I'd Love You To Love To
by Dashel
Summary: Continuation of the I Want/I Need series. Sasuke and Naruto still see each other only occasionally and its never enough for either of them. So Naruto decides to leave the village for a little while and spend some uninterrupted time with Sasuke.
1. Chapter 1

_Warnings, background and general stuff:_

_Welcome back everyone, sorry about the wait, but I just wanted a little break._

_Warnings: This fic is **rated M for adults only **for a pretty good reason. Sex, swearing, maybe a little violence._

_This is also the third installment in a trilogy. If you haven't read the other two I suggest though not demand that you go back and read the first two._

_Oh and guys, I never really began the first one with a view to add two more installments either so with that in mind I'm kinda stepping away from the real timeline a little. I've kept it vague up until this point because of that but I will warn you I'm pretty much throwing it out the window at this point._

_Coverart for this instalment beautifully done by roxx1407. You're awesome roxx, thanks for the pic!_

_Dash_

* * *

><p>I'd Love You To Love To<p>

Chapter 1

Sasuke was sick of pacing so he stopped for a moment and tried to gauge how much daylight was left by how much light he could still see through the leaves above.

Not much, the sky was fading to a sort of yellowy orange already. That meant that he'd been out here pacing for the better part of an hour now. Maybe his message hadn't gotten through, maybe he wasn't there to even receive the message. Sure he'd sent that message a couple of days ago, but he could have left for a mission before that and therefore been none the wiser.

Sasuke just couldn't wait here much longer. It was very dangerous for him to be here. If someone saw him his life would be over.

Of course if he was going to be completely honest with himself, he had to admit that his lack of patience with the situation wasn't because he was risking his life and freedom. He was just impatient because he'd been looking forward to this for a whole week and now that the waiting was over he had no patience to wait even an hour longer.

He started pacing again.

"You'll wear a groove in the dirt if you keep pacing like you're pissed off with the ground or something."

Could he have been so introspective that he simply hadn't heard or sensed the other ninja sneak up on him? It was entirely possible. But then again, it was also entirely possible that he was underestimating the other ninja.

Despite his relief that the wait was over, despite all his other feelings, he glared at Naruto in such a vile way that far older and more experienced ninja had been reduced to word stammering terror by that look from Sasuke. Naruto knew better than to he fazed by it though and just grinned one of those big goofy smiles at him.

"So sour, Sasuke? I didn't expect chocolates and flowers but that stare isn't exactly the warm welcome I had imagined."

Sasuke took a few moments to look Naruto over. He hadn't really come dressed for a long outing. A black t-shirt, his usual orange pants and that was about it. He didn't even have his headband on. It was just like he'd stepped out of his apartment to go down to the shops or something. Which really had pretty much been the case minus the shops part. They were so close to Konoha here that Sasuke could swear he could smell Ichiraku's. It was possible though that the smell was coming from Naruto. Naruto's overall appearance and smell made Sasuke remember what Naruto had said to him previously as it always did when he met up with Naruto this close to the village – which had become all too often lately – that it would be good if Sasuke returned. They could see each other every day, every night. He could see Naruto like this, casual, not dressed for battle and smell not of dirt and traveling but of his favorite food and whatever soap he had used on himself that morning. It always surprised him how he felt about that particular temptation. Knowing what he was missing out on made him feel a little hollow.

Naruto was leaning up against a tree watching Sasuke watch him like it was the most fascinating thing in the world. Until Sasuke moved then he saw that familiar look of anticipation cross his features. Sasuke walked right up to him, backing him into the tree he was standing against and kissed him roughly.

He wasted very little time on visits like this, every moment he was here put them both in very real danger, which was a pity in a way. He wanted to take his time, wanted to spend time with him afterwards, but the location made it impossible. And besides, he'd been waiting so long now, merely having a casual chat with him just wasn't going to cut it. He needed him, now.

He only let loose Naruto's lips when he needed to rid him of that t-shirt and his own shirt while he was at it.

"This is more what I expected," Naruto informed him.

He really should know by now what to expect on these visits. It had happened all too frequently lately. The last time had only been a fortnight ago.

It had been four months since the Land of the Sun give or take a week or so. And after they'd parted ways there it had been only a month before they had run into one another again. It was almost funny. Naruto had told him how hard it had been to find him before, now it seemed like the universe just couldn't keep them apart.

Naruto had been on a mission and Sasuke had just happened to see him on the street in a village he was using to hole up in for a while. He hadn't approached him then, Naruto had been with his teammates. But seeing him and not being able to talk to him had driven him nuts. He'd tossed and turned in his bed so much that he'd very brazenly gotten up and searched out the place where Naruto was staying. He'd been sharing a room with that Sai guy unfortunately, but Sasuke still managed to creep inside and leave a note for him without either of them waking up. The note had been simple enough.

_Room 34_

_The White Lotus_

_You still owe me._

It was a little vague maybe and he worried for a time that perhaps Naruto wouldn't get the meaning, wouldn't come or would come with reinforcements to take him home. But Naruto had shown up the very next night, alone, smiling and told Sasuke that he didn't owe him anything anymore because he had already paid that particular debt off the last time they had been together. Again, and again.

Of course that didn't stop him from a repeat performance that night either.

Sasuke had been very stupid that night, he couldn't believe he had risked so much just to see him again and it forced him to wonder why. He kept telling himself that he just needed the contact with another person, and that it wasn't about Naruto. And he still almost had himself believing it too. But the fact of the matter was that he was risking his life in order for that contact with a very particular someone. He trusted so few people to see the side of him that he let Naruto see and perhaps he thought it was just easier to go back to him rather than find someone a little safer, but truthfully, he just couldn't bring himself to do it. He'd tried and failed on a couple of occasions. These people he'd tried with were just too… unchallenging. No matter what he asked of them, they would do. No matter what he said to them, they never disputed him. They were boring and compliant and they weren't…right. If Sasuke said something bizarre, Naruto would question it. If he told him off, Naruto would always have some sort of comeback, lame or not. He wasn't afraid of getting into a fight with him, he wasn't afraid to tell him when he thought he was being too grumpy or stupid. He treated Sasuke like nobody else treated him, like a normal imperfect person. And it didn't hurt that he was pretty nice to look at either.

Sasuke had spent a few precious minutes the night he had crept into his room to leave the note, watching him sleep, bathed in the moonlight, snoring like a champion and had felt himself smile. Even with his mouth half open, limbs akimbo and twisted in the bed sheets there was something truly charming about him. Or maybe pleasing was a better word. It was all he could do to keep his hands to himself actually.

After their night together the following evening, Naruto had to leave the next day, mission accomplished but had left Sasuke another note while he'd been sleeping off their night's activities. The note's contents had surprised him more than his own apparent inability to not visit Naruto the night before.

_Same day next month at midnight._

_Fern Valley_

_We can work out what you now owe me._

And so it had begun. They'd send each other a letter occasionally, always taking turns on where, when and who owed who what this time. It had started being a month apart but gradually the notes had been sent with a little more regularity so much so that it was becoming difficult for them both to get time away from what they were doing to actually meet up with each other. And this is why Sasuke had found himself so close to Konoha so often lately. Naruto had the least time to spare and more missions to complete that Sasuke had just given in and started meeting him closer to home in order to assure that he could see Naruto when he wanted to.

It was stupid and dangerous, and after each time he would vow to himself not to take such a stupid risk again. But then he'd get a message from Naruto and he'd end up doing it all over again. He felt like someone else was controlling his actions, he just couldn't stay away the urge to see him again was just so strong.

Sasuke was sitting against the tree, getting his breath back a little while later. Naruto was lying on his back amongst the fallen leaves on the ground in a similar state. Sasuke knew he should leave soon, he just couldn't afford to dawdle. But his legs felt weak and his heart was still racing and he just didn't want to move yet.

"We need to plan better next time," he told Naruto.

"Sure easy for you to say. You're as free as a bird till your teammate recovers or whatever you told me last time. I still have to go on missions you know. The only time I ever get more than a couple of days off is when I'm in the hospital."

Sasuke scowled down at him. "Maybe you like the idea that I might be captured and taken to the village."

Naruto scowled right back at him. "You were the one that first suggested we start meeting here."

"I was hoping it was just going to be a one off."

"Look," Naruto began sitting up. He still had leaves in his hair sticking out amongst the yellow spikes. It was almost adorable. "People get suspicious if I leave the village after each mission for sometimes days at a time. And that's if I get the luxury of even having a few days off. What do you want me to do?"

Sasuke had been thinking about this actually and now that he had the perfect opportunity to voice that thought he found he simply couldn't. He had told Naruto on a previous occasion that, 'You can't get too involved because you don't know what might happen in the future.' And if he went ahead and suggested what he was thinking that would definitely constitute as getting too involved. He had rationalized it by telling himself that his idea wasn't because he wanted anything more than what he already had with the possible exception of a little more freedom. It wasn't because he wanted more on an emotional level; that was just crazy.

Naruto took his silence to mean that Sasuke just simply couldn't think of anything. And so Naruto got to his feet.

"I better go,"

Upon hearing that, Sasuke forced himself to make the suggestion after all. He had to get it out or it would bug him on the way home. He didn't like to leave things unresolved.

"You're always trying to get me to come back. Why don't you just leave instead?"

Naruto stopped just as he was about to put his shirt back on.

"What?"

"Why don't you leave?" Sasuke repeated more slowly as though Naruto was hard of hearing.

"You mean come with you?"

Sasuke frowned, it seemed Naruto was getting the wrong impression.

"Wipe the stupid expression off your face, I'm not asking you to marry me Dobe, just to leave for a while."

"I'm not a rogue," Naruto told him darkly.

Sasuke didn't appreciate the tone. Especially since he was technically a rogue himself. "I'm only suggesting that you get out of the village and make a life for yourself somewhere else. Didn't your Master spend time out in the world just wandering? They never called him a rogue. Have you thought about doing that yourself?"

Naruto's expression softened a little at that. Apparently he did spend a moment thinking that over before shaking his head. "I couldn't. People rely on me. Besides spending more time with you shouldn't be the reason for leaving the village. I wanted _you_ to come back. That wasn't just for me you know."

"Uh huh, whatever. As if I'd want to come back just to make Sakura happy."

"It wouldn't just be for Sakura," Naruto told him as he roughly tugged his shirt back over his head.

Sasuke sensed he'd said the wrong thing. Usually he could care less, but for some reason he didn't feel like ending tonight in a fight. So many nights usually did, but after finally being able to voice his suggestion, he wanted to make sure Naruto didn't leave angry.

He got up and went over to where Naruto had just finished dressing. Naruto wouldn't look at him. Sasuke grabbed his chin and made him look into his eyes. He wasn't gentle about it.

"Even if it was just for a week or something, tell them you need time off, I don't care, just think about it."

Reluctantly, Naruto nodded. "Sure Sasuke." He looked on the verge of saying more but instead said, "I gotta go now and so do you. Be careful okay?"

Sasuke sighed and nodded and watched Naruto leave. Next time would be Naruto's turn to write the message. Sasuke wondered weather he'd even get one this time.

* * *

><p>It had only been a couple of days and Naruto was sitting at his table in his apartment, head in hand, staring out the window into the night and tapping his pen on a blank sheet of paper.<p>

It was too soon. They'd only seen each other three days ago and yet here he was, contemplating sending another letter to Sasuke. There was something definitely wrong here. Of course he'd been obsessed about Sasuke before their time in the Land of Shadows but now that obsession had turned into something a little bit different. And a little bit unhealthy if he was going to be honest with himself. His last mission had only been an overnight affair and the entire time he'd been distracted by thoughts of Sasuke who he'd seen only the night before.

He'd been hiding his little encounters with Sasuke for months now and it was getting a little difficult to keep up the charade. The people around him were beginning to notice how he had changed and how he often went missing for days sometimes. It was harder still to hide the physical marks left on him by the encounters. Sasuke could be gentle when the mood took him, but that sort of a mood was pretty rare and generally only happened if he got a shade too carried away and Naruto objected to the treatment. Usually by yelling at him and telling him off. Afterwards Sasuke would be gentler for a little while at least, but that wasn't often. It also wasn't often that Naruto felt the need to tell him off though. He liked to see Sasuke all impatient and demanding because it made him feel very wanted, very needed. Oh yes, he liked it when Sasuke lost control of himself that little bit, because he wasn't seeing that cool calculating mask anymore. It took him a little out of himself and Naruto imagined he saw glimpses of the raw unchecked person beneath the mask.

But enjoying rough sex also had its major drawbacks. The biggest one while trying to keep his jaunts with Sasuke a secret were hiding the marks left on his body from the experience. Lucky for both of them he was a fast healer but it wasn't fast enough sometimes. He still had marks on his back from the jagged tree bark Sasuke had him up against, barely healed teeth marks on his shoulder and a few scattered bruises all over his body. Naruto wasn't complaining he had enjoyed every single moment of it and no doubt Sasuke had a few marks on his body as well.

But he'd gotten a graze on his arm from the last mission and Sakura had to heal him. He'd kept his shirt on but she had noticed a little of the damage to his shoulder from the tree and gone off at him for not telling her that he had even more injuries that he hadn't told her about. She had demanded that he take off his shirt so she could take a look but he had managed to talk her out of it telling her that it had happened days ago and had already been treated. She had very dubiously allowed him to stay dressed. The tree bark might have been easy enough to explain away, but how do you explain how you got teeth marks on your shoulder?

His reluctance to let Sakura fuss over him hadn't been totally lost on Kakashi though, and neither had his total inability to focus on the rest of the mission. His head was in another place and although he tried to focus on the task at hand it was obvious that he wasn't performing up to standards. Kakashi had asked him if anything was bothering him and Naruto had denied it with a grin and a story about not getting a lot of sleep the night before, which was true enough. But Kakashi had still kept him only as support when the real fighting began and it bothered Naruto a lot that he could no longer be trusted to help out to the best of his abilities.

Naruto got up from the table and threw the pen down angrily. How could he be thinking of setting up another rendezvous with Sasuke just after he'd seen how much it was affecting him out in the field? What was wrong with him?

According to Sasuke it was just all a bit of fun, a needed way to unwind. Well fine, it might be that way for Sasuke, but Naruto found that he couldn't just turn off like that afterwards. He thought about him, dwelled over what they did and it was beginning to get to him in more ways than one.

Deciding he needed air and to get away from all sorts of writing implements, he left his apartment and wandered through the lamp lit streets and attempted to clear his mind. It didn't work all that well. While he was walking he realized something had to be done. He couldn't keep going this way. But Sasuke refused to come back so what was left? Stop seeing him obviously. The thought was not a pleasant one. It had only been a couple of days now and already he was getting urges to see Sasuke again like the man was some kind of drug he was addicted to. And just like a drug, going cold turkey was going to be painful.

Someone grabbed his shoulder stopping him before he could walk right into them. He'd been so focused he hadn't even noticed that he was about to run into someone. Lucky for him, the someone had stopped him in time. Unluckily for him, that someone had been Kakashi.

"You look distracted," Kakashi greatly understated.

"Just thinking, Kakashi Sensei. Sorry about running into you, I wasn't watching where I was going."

"Yeah, I could see that." Kakashi watched Naruto's forced grin for a few moments longer before apparently deciding on something. "You don't have to tell me what's bothering you Naruto, but maybe I can help you get your head on straight if you at least give me some sort of clue what this is about. I don't want to pressure you, but I've been thinking of leaving you behind on the next mission."

Naruto scowled at what Kakashi thought of as not wanting to pressure him. Obviously Kakashi was done tiptoeing around the issue. Naruto's behavior had been different now for months and he probably didn't seem to be getting any better only worse. Of course Kakashi was losing faith in him. He thought he'd be angry at being left behind, but his already morose mood told him that it was probably inevitable considering how poorly he been performing lately.

Kakashi wanted to help and Naruto desperately wanted someone to talk to, but he could never reveal what was really going on. Kakashi might be able to see there was an issue, but he couldn't know what that issue was. However, Naruto knew he would never be trusted again if it didn't seem like he was willing to let someone help him with his problems. He decided that talking about it was probably the best solution so long as he could be vague enough. Nobody was around at this time of night so the sooner he did it, the better.

"You're right, something is bothering me. I have something on my mind and I just can't stop thinking about it. But I never get enough time to deal with it. Whenever the chance presents itself, there's just never enough time. We barely spend more than a day or two in the village now before we have another mission."

Kakashi just watched him impassively for the moment. Obviously Naruto saying that he was going on too many missions was a very alien thing for him to say. "Do you think this issue can be resolved if you had more time to deal with it?"

That wasn't a question Naruto felt he could confidently answer. Sending more time with Sasuke might make things worse.

"Maybe, I don't know."

"Naruto, what if I told you to take a week to find out. I admit I was going to stand you down for the next mission anyway so why don't you take the time to see if this can be resolved. You never know, devoting yourself to the problem, even if you don't get a resolution to it might mean that you aren't at least as plagued by it anymore."

Kakashi had a point. He may find that nothing changed but just maybe if he got a long enough time to scratch this obsessive itch, he might not remain so engrossed in when he was getting his next Sasuke fix at the very least.

He still didn't like how he was getting this time to find out, but one way or another, he was going to try and sort things out so that it might never happen again.

There was just one more problem.

"Kakashi Sensei, I'll need to leave the village."

"The Hokage won't like the idea that you'll be leaving the village on your own.

Naruto frowned at the ground by his feet.

"But still," Kakashi continued a little more brightly. "I doubt she'll like the idea of a possibly mentally troubled jinjuriki staying in her village even less. I'll get it sorted for you."

Naruto smiled up at Kakashi. "You're the best Kakashi."

"Yeah, I know."

Naruto left Kakashi soon after, running home. He did, after all, have a letter to write.

* * *

><p>Any letters that Naruto sent to him went directly to Granny Cat. It was the only safe place Sasuke knew he could return to and did return to with any sort of regularity. He mainly went there to pick up weapons but since he was getting his mail through there now, quite often Granny would send the letter along with a messenger cat when it wasn't likely Sasuke was going to drop in to pick it up soon. The ninja cats could always find him no matter where he was.<p>

He was still near the Fire Country and only just met back up with his team a few days ago when the cat arrived with his letter. Sasuke was very confused because it was too soon to be from Naruto. Surely he couldn't be setting up another tryst so soon. Of course after their last conversation, Sasuke had wondered whether he'd ever get another letter again and was now thinking that this might be a final sort of letter. 'We can't keep doing this, we should forget the whole thing', something like that. Sasuke was surprised at his reaction to that thought. It was the first letter he'd gotten that he didn't tear open right away, eager to read it. He simply didn't want to open it. But he didn't expect to feel so empty at the very idea of getting a letter like this. He didn't understand what emotions caused the reaction and he really didn't want to find out. He almost threw the letter away unopened but knew he couldn't do that. So telling himself over and over again that it wasn't a big deal, whatever the letter said, that he didn't care if he never saw the Dobe again, he ripped open the letter and read the contents. Slowly his frown turned into a look of surprise and he suddenly had to sit down.

Meanwhile his team mates had been watching this all from their various seats in the room, stunned over their leader's rapid change in moods. They looked at each other puzzled when Sasuke finally sat down letting the note fall from nerveless fingers.

After a few moments of staring at the floor he seemed to come back to himself and caught them all staring. "I'm leaving again," he told them shortly. "You all have jobs to do, go and do them."

"But you just got back," Karin protested.

Sasuke stood up again and fixed her with a cold look. Karin didn't utter another word and neither did Sasuke, he just turned and left the room.

Karin picked up the letter Sasuke had dropped and read the short note that had so obviously gotten to him. They were used to Sasuke getting notes and then announcing he was leaving for a while, but this had been weirder.

It said simply,

_You said a week, so I got a week._

_I'll see you at the waterfall as soon as you can_

_You owe me BIG for this._

She had to assume Sasuke knew what it meant, but for the life of her, she couldn't figure out why he had been so effected by it.

* * *

><p><em>Notes<em>

_A whole week and no back plot to deal with. The possibilities might just be endless…_

_Well, welcome back everyone! It turns out the break between fics wasn't as long as I imagined it would be so yay. I will warn you all that there isn't really going to be a back plot in this one. Really the plots for the other two were only there to get some interesting interactions out of our boys but I think it's time to deal with them mostly on their own since I want to wrap this one up emotionally for the pair. Doesn't mean I won't be dwelling on a little physical interaction either but you get the idea. It's hard to deal with all the deep emotional stuff sometimes when their pair are being hunted by ninja's all the time. I just hope it doesn't make it too boring for you all but somehow I doubt this will be the case. Oh well, keep a look out for the update and review the opening chapter for me to let me know how you all think it's going._

_Thanks,_

_-Dash_


	2. Chapter 2

I'd Love You To Love To

Part II

It hadn't taken a genius to work out which waterfall Naruto had been referring to. It was the one inside the Land of Shadows where they'd had their first kiss. Well, their first intentional kiss anyway.

Sasuke wasn't the first one to reach the waterfall and that surprised him a little. Even though he hadn't received the letter until probably days after Naruto had sent it, he didn't figure Naruto had left the same day as he'd sent it. Not to mention Sasuke had been closer to the Land of Shadows to begin with. But he was hardly displeased at this turn of events and when he caught sight of him, his need to keep rushing stalled for a moment.

Naruto had obviously just been in the lagoon. He wore his pants and nothing else. Water still plastered most of his hair to his head and was still apparent on his arms and chest. He was wandering around his little camp looking for something he must have misplaced, a confused expression on his face. Sasuke just watched him for a little while.

By the look of the recent campfire, Naruto would have gotten here yesterday so he must have sent the letter and then left the very next day. That seemed eager, even for Naruto. Well he couldn't just hang around and enjoy the sights all day…

Naruto straightened up from looking in his pack and scratched his head.

"Lose your brain again, Dobe?"

Naruto wasn't surprised in the least when he heard Sasuke's voice. He just smiled and shrugged. "Lost my map."

Sasuke walked the rest of the distance to the camp and stopped just a few paces away. "I have a map, but the question is, why do you need one?"

"So I don't get lost." Naruto told him as though it were obvious.

The simple answer, the fact that he thought it was a stupid question was one of those distinctly Naruto moments Sasuke missed a little when they didn't have time to talk much to each other. He supposed that wasn't really an issue for the moment though. He took a few more steps closer, a determined look on his face, ready for their fun time to begin when Naruto took a smart step backward and held up his hands, seemingly to ward him off. Sasuke stopped abruptly and raised a single eyebrow at him.

"It's a little late to act hard to get isn't it? I was only going to kiss you."

"Yeah right, your kisses aren't just kisses. You only kiss me when you want something more and we don't have time for that."

Sasuke didn't feel good about where this was heading. "I thought you said you had a week?"

"Yeah that's right, though my week actually started yesterday. But that's not important, we need to leave. If I can find my map, I can show you where we need to go."

"You don't like it here?"

"I don't want to be anywhere where there are ninjas. You're a rogue, I'm a Fire Country ninja and I don't want to be anywhere this week where we have to look over our shoulders every five minutes to see who's gonna kill us. Call me crazy but I'd like to spend my vacation a little more peacefully."

Sasuke gave him a half smile at that. "You want a serene vacation and you decided to spend it with _me_?"

Sasuke had a point. Their interaction probably wasn't the most calming way to spend a day, but it sure was relieving. But the way Sasuke said that Naruto was spending his vacation with him almost made it sound a little romantic causing him to color slightly at the implication. He hadn't really thought of it that way. Primarily, he was away from the village to spend time with Sasuke and hopefully get over his obsession. Saying it was his vacation gave this week a different kind of undertone that made him a little embarrassed. But in all reality, that's pretty much how it was.

"You don't have to say it like that," Naruto told him going a little pink about the ears. "I'm on vacation and you wanted me to spend more time outside the village. Two birds, one stone and all that. You're making it sound so…"

"Amorous?" Sasuke asked with a smirk.

"And now you're making fun of me." Naruto told him, not really knowing what the word meant but understanding the intended gist of it anyway. "You don't have to come you know. If you want we can spend a couple of hours here doing what you came here for and then you can leave and I'll go on without you. Whatever, it was your idea."

Sasuke shrugged like it didn't matter, however there was no way he was going to let this opportunity slide by. He wasn't sure when it had become about more than just sex, but somewhere, sometime, it had. He still maintained that didn't mean they were getting too close or anything but he had to at least fess up to the realization that he enjoyed hanging out with someone else for a change. Someone who wouldn't blindly follow him, someone who would actually argue with him occasionally, and someone who genuinely seemed to care about him, at least a little. He had missed all that when they had just been meeting to indulge only in the physical side of things so there was no way Naruto would be leaving here without him. This week was not going to be about either of their normal lives and the restrictions and angst that went along with those lives. This week was going to be about them. It wasn't just a vacation for Naruto, it was a vacation for Sasuke too.

"You think you're going to get off that lightly? Think again, Dobe."

Naruto gave him a sort of smile and tried to act casual. Sasuke could see how pleased he was by the news though, even if he was trying to hide it.

"Alright, but we have to get moving so don't get comfortable."

* * *

><p>This was possibly a new record. For the first time in many months, they had so far spent almost an entire day and a half together without even the slightest of physical contact. Sure, Sasuke had admitted to himself that physical contact wasn't <em>everything <em>but it was still good to have. But Naruto seemed adamant that they keep moving though and Sasuke didn't force the issue, realizing that he must have his reasons. One of those reasons being the fact that it took them nearly a whole day to reach their destination and that was at the fastest pace they were both capable of. Sasuke felt like pointing out that so far he had wasted two days traveling but was cut short when they got to where they were going.

It had gotten colder the further north they had traveled and when they neared where they were going they started to see snow on the ground. Winter wasn't far away it seemed and it always hit the northern areas of the continent first. But it did make the view more beautiful when they arrived in the township of Michiko. The small town was nestled against a tall steep mountain that Sasuke realized must have been Mount Michiko, an active volcano. He'd heard stories about this place but he hadn't heard about the hot springs resort at the edge of town. It looked luxurious beyond anything Sasuke had stayed at in, well, ever and he wondered how they could afford to be staying here. But apparently Naruto had quite a bit of money saved from the numerous missions he'd been on recently and told Sasuke it would be his treat, at least for a couple of days. It was night time when they arrived, but the staff in the resort were only too happy to greet them and take them to their room, even as travel stained and poor looking as they were.

As they entered their room, Naruto told him a little about the town and what he'd heard. Apparently they made weapons of good quality here that were rarely seen back in the fire country and he wanted to check it out. At least he knew now how Naruto had known about this place because apparently Tenten had recommended it to him the last time they had been out on a mission together. And while Naruto was more interested in the luxuries offered by the resort and the hot springs than the idea of the weapons Tenten had drooled over, he was still pretty keen to see if he could get anything interesting to help him with his training while he was here.

"So, this was your grand scheme was it? You want to bum around a resort town for the entire week?" Sasuke asked when they were alone.

Naruto scowled at him while he entered the room and dumped his bag in a corner. It was a very nice room and the two nights they'd be staying here had cost him just about everything he had saved. But lately he'd begun to think of sleeping in his own apartment as opulence due to having to sleep on the ground during missions more often than not. He figured it was about time to gain some perspective and this was probably the only chance he'd have to do so for a very long time. It was a huge room, or rather set of rooms with their own walled in hot spring just outside. He was glad about that, he wasn't sure if Sasuke could be trusted to keep his hands to himself in the public baths. It wasn't as though he was grabby, but he didn't care if he made a scene or not and would probably do it just because it would annoy the other patrons and Naruto.

"Not for the whole week. I thought a couple of days here then up the mountain for a bit of sightseeing."

"Up the mountain?"

"Sure."

"The mountain that happens to be an active volcano?"

"Why not?"

Sasuke gave him a brief half smile. "I see your definition of a relaxing vacation differs a little from that of normal people."

"Look it's not like the thing is gonna explode unexpectedly is it? I just wanna have a peek, that's all."

"Dobe, that's what active volcanoes do, they explode unexpectedly."

"I bet there's been no earthquakes lately. Besides they haven't had a big eruption around here in decades. Must be safe enough otherwise why would they build a town here?"

"Because people are idiots." Sasuke told him bluntly.

"I still want to have a look. An active volcano should be exciting, right?"

"And the fact that some folks say there's an ancient ninjutsu scroll hidden somewhere up there by the last of the Mael clan doesn't factor into your decision at all?"

Naruto tried to keep his face as expressionless as possible without much success.

_How had Sasuke known?_

In another time and place he might have been happy that Sasuke knew him so well but right about now, he just didn't want to give the smug bastard the satisfaction.

"Oh," he replied as nonchalantly as he could, turning from Sasuke to take a look out the window. "I hadn't heard about that one."

He felt rather than heard Sasuke move. He felt the press of a body behind him then saw Sasuke's arms snake around his waist, palms flat against his belly. In front of him was one of those huge floor to ceiling windows and Naruto could see Sasuke smirking from behind him in the mirrored reflection due to the darkened room they were in, his chin resting comfortably on Naruto's shoulder, Sasuke's lips just near his ear.

"Remember that I do enjoy it when you lie to me. I wonder what else I could get you to lie about."

"Ask me if I think you are at all funny and I'll tell you you're hilarious. That oughta do it." Naruto told him with little humor.

Sasuke pressed into him more making Naruto have to lean up against the window with both hands. He could have stepped forward a little or held his ground but that would've meant losing that contact with Sasuke.

Sasuke slipped his still very cold hands from the chill outside up inside the bottom of Naruto's t-shirt. Those cold hands sliding up his stomach gave him shivers.

"Oh I know how to get you to lie." He heard in a smug tone. "Tell me you want me." Sasuke whispered into his ear.

Naruto closed his eyes and he felt those hands slip lower, fingers gliding teasingly just under the waist of his pants.

"I want you," Naruto told him after a moment. It wasn't a shocking statement really. It wasn't like he hadn't said as much to Sasuke before just maybe not in those exact words.

"Hnn, not lying. That's interesting. Okay then, tell me that you _need_ me."

Hands moved lower dragging his pants down just a little as they went. He felt cool air about an inch below his waist. Damn Sasuke and his teasing. He didn't _need_ Sasuke, that was ridiculous, but he was willing to lie if it meant this would continue.

"I need you."

Sasuke's hands paused briefly, but only for about a second. It seemed that Naruto had surprised him for a moment.

"Also…not a lie."

Naruto's eyes snapped open then. Wasn't a lie…what?

What Sasuke was doing to him wasn't giving him a moment to think, which was probably Sasuke's intention. One hand moved lower, palming him while the other moved back up to his lips, fingers seeking entry. Naruto obliged, and knowing where this was going, coated them well before the fingers went away and he felt them slip down in between their bodies to push at his opening. Somebody sure was impatient though because the preparation didn't last long and Naruto felt something else prodding him almost as soon as he felt that hand return to grab his hip.

"You're not playing along, I want to hear you lie. Fine, tell me you care about me, that you love me even."

Naruto half opened his eyes to watch Sasuke's expression over his shoulder reflected back in the dark glass in front of him. Not even to please Sasuke would Naruto say that he did in order for Sasuke to finally hear him lying. Sasuke wouldn't stop now, so Naruto wasn't about to give him the satisfaction of getting him to lie.

"Of course I don't, Teme."

Sasuke looked perfectly dismayed…for about half a second. And then that smirk came back, but something was off about it. It was almost enough to jolt Naruto out of the moment but not before Sasuke pushed forward just a little and Naruto stopped thinking entirely for a while.

* * *

><p>Later they were sprawled out on the futon and Sasuke had already fallen asleep. He had gone to sleep facing Naruto who was sprawled on his back in what would probably turn out to be a vain and painful attempt to bend his spine back into a proper shape. Naruto could feel the slight touch of the back of Sasuke's hand against his leg which was becoming something of a habit. Since that last night in the village of the Sun whenever they actually had a chance to fall asleep in the same room as one another they would always have the slightest of contact between them. Usually their fingers would be touching but tonight Sasuke had shifted in his sleep and they'd lost that contact. Moments after it had happened though, Naruto felt this new touch on his leg because Sasuke had changed position again in his sleep in order to get that contact back again and hadn't moved an inch since. Naruto had to wonder if he did the same thing in his sleep. If he moved in the night and broke that touch between them, did he unconsciously reach out again to regain it? He could believe that he did, because they never woke up together without some small part of them touching each other. It was always slight, barely felt, but always there. He wondered what that meant and if it was a reflection on how lonely they were.<p>

Actually, as he lay there occasionally watching the face of the man sleeping next to him he wondered about a lot of things, especially about Sasuke's questions from earlier, and his reactions to the responses. Okay so before he had compared Sasuke to a drug he was addicted to so he supposed in a way it shouldn't be a surprise that he felt he might need Sasuke. Okay problem solved, he could live with that revelation and he wasn't surprised that Sasuke knew he had been telling the truth without actually meaning to.

But he knew he didn't love Sasuke. He cared about him in his way, but love him in the way Sasuke was suggesting? No, he couldn't believe that. But Sasuke hadn't told him whether he thought Naruto had been lying or not. Naruto had been as surprised as Sasuke in response to the second question. He hadn't realized himself that he might have been telling the real truth. But that was just it, Sasuke could always tell. So what had Sasuke learnt from that last question, what real truth had he uncovered that not even Naruto had been aware of? The suspense was killing him. He wanted to shake Sasuke awake and make him tell him. But on the other hand, ignorance might be easier to deal with. Talking about your feelings or lack thereof with Sasuke wasn't some of the best conversations they'd had in the past. Either way, Sasuke hadn't seemed at all put off by his response in the end, just that moment of apprehension, so he had to assume that he'd been telling the truth and Sasuke had been expecting something different. Maybe he'd been a little pissed that Naruto hadn't lied for him? That's probably what it was. Either that or he had been surprised that Naruto didn't in fact love him. Knowing Sasuke, he probably thought everyone was in love with him, and sure, just about every girl and a few guys seemed to fall instantly in love with him despite his personality, but Naruto wasn't some girl with a crush and he would have thought Sasuke realized this. Oh well, who knew the depths of Sasuke's ego?

Giving up on his back, Naruto turned on his side to face away from Sasuke and get some sleep. He hadn't realized he'd broken that light contact again. But just before he dozed off he felt the soft touch of a hand on his side. Naruto allowed a small smile and fell asleep.

* * *

><p>The next morning he woke up to the odd but extremely pleasant sensation of a warm talented mouth encircling his cock. The light, teasing suction, the swirling tongue, one arm wrapped around his upper thigh, the other hand on his hip both keeping him still and bracing the owner of that wonderful mouth up, and the tickle of soft raven black hair moving low against his belly.<p>

"Sasuke?"

"Mmpf," was the muffled reply from someone with their mouth most definitely full.

The plan for today was going to be to explore the town and take in the sights like a true vacationer. However this situation was beginning to make him think that staying in the room for the next couple of days might be a better option.

Lying on his back, Naruto had two fistfuls of bedding clutched in either hand while Sasuke worked on him. It was too much, and soon after he was laying there spent, breathing heavily while Sasuke sat up and watched him with that half smile that always made him feel like he was the butt of some private joke. He was pretty far from caring though.

"Morning," Naruto managed after a moment.

"Morning. You know, you sleep pretty heavily for a ninja."

Of course when Sasuke was having one of his nightmares nothing short of violence would wake him up but Naruto figured that this wasn't the time to mention such things.

"You're going to break me," he said instead.

"Sounds like a plan. I sent for some breakfast for you while you were asleep. I doubted you'd want to explore today since it's been snowing all morning."

"Oh," he replied a little crestfallen. He'd been looking forward to having a look around town in the daylight. But staying inside all day wasn't a bad alternative either. "Breakfast for me? Did you already have something?"

Sasuke grinned and gave him a significant look. "Yes."

Not the quickest thinker, it took Naruto a little while to see the joke for what it was. "Oh. Funny."

* * *

><p>Breakfast came and went – with no pun intended - just after they'd put on the barest necessity of clothes for modesty. The room was well heated but outside looked freezing. Naruto was looking out the window at the heavy snowfall that might end his plans for the week while Sasuke was doing much the same, only he was more lamenting the fact that he couldn't use the private spring outside their room while it was still snowing.<p>

"I could have done with a soak, my muscles are pretty sore," Sasuke told him sitting down next to him on the floor by the window that overlooked their private spring.

"_Your_ muscles are sore? Teme, I'm surprised my back is still working after last night."

"You're such a lightweight," Sasuke scoffed.

"Maybe you're just rough," Naruto countered.

"I didn't hear you complaining," Sasuke pointed out. "I heard you groan and moan my name a few times, but I never heard you say 'stop'."

"As if you would have if I did," he teased.

Sasuke lost all traces of humor from his face and turned a stony look on Naruto. "You think I would force you?"

Naruto, a little taken back by the change in atmosphere, gave Sasuke a very confused look. "I guess not. But you're the one that keeps telling me what a badass you are these days, why would you care if I thought that?"

"Do you really think so?"

"The way you make it sound, I think you might kill someone for looking at you funny, so I suppose there's a lot of things you might be capable of."

Sasuke was looking distinctly angry now. "So how many times have you wanted to tell me 'no' or 'stop' then and you just didn't because you thought it wouldn't make any difference to me?"

"What? None. I'd never do anything I didn't want to do. As if you could ever force me if I didn't want to anyway. I'm not some helpless damsel you know."

"But you think I would."

"No, not really." Naruto confessed. "What's up with you anyway? I was just teasing you, but you're getting so defensive. I notice you don't care if I think you'd kill people for no good reason, so what gives?"

"Nothing." Sasuke muttered turning away. "You're right, I don't care what you think."

And that would have probably ended the conversation right there if someone had let it. For once though, it wasn't Naruto that couldn't let something go.

"You always think the best of people, even sometimes when they're trying to kill you. No matter what you think I've done, you still want to save me from myself and take me back to the village so how could you want to save someone you obviously think is evil?"

Naruto gave him a funny look. "I don't think you're evil. Sure you can be an asshole, but you're still my friend. Look if it bothers you that much, no I don't think you're the sort of person who would force themselves on anyone. As if you'd ever have to. Everyone that ever meets you seems to throw themselves at you."

"You can't be jealous of me," Sasuke replied not bothering to deny the statement. He seemed a lot less riled after Naruto's little speech though. "It's not as good as it sounds."

There was a darker note still in there and Naruto couldn't figure out where it was coming from, but he just didn't know what to ask first. He thought briefly that maybe he should let it drop because it would probably piss Sasuke off, but he'd learnt that when Sasuke was pissed, he tended to let the most slip. Sasuke seemed to need to win arguments so badly that he'd divulge things that he probably otherwise would have kept secret just to prove his point. And Naruto knew how to press his buttons.

"Oh, I suppose all the weight of those girls hanging off you must be a real burden. You don't know how many people would kill to have whatever it is that makes you so popular. Sure you're nice enough looking I suppose, but you're a real jerk too so I don't really get what they see in you."

His little speech didn't seem to have the desired effect though. "Says the person who just had sex with me last night. You might answer your own question then because obviously you seem to be one of them."

"I'm not some brainless groupie that follows your every word and gesture with moon eyes and you know it."

"Which is why I'm here with you and not off with some brainless groupie."

"Wait a minute, last time we talked about this you said this was just some entertainment, some fun. So why does it matter who it's with?"

"Does it surprise you that I find actually being able to talk to someone who doesn't just blindly follow my every whim to be part of that fun?"

Naruto thought about that for a moment but it didn't help. "Yes."

"And here I thought you knew me better than most."

"It's just that most of our conversations are arguments, how can you call that fun?"

"Maybe 'challenging' is a better word." Sasuke replied actually smiling.

"You know I'm trying to argue with you now too, why the hell are you smiling?"

"Because you lied to me again earlier," Sasuke told him. "You said I was 'nice-enough looking', you lied."

"And that makes you happy? Are you so besieged by compliments these days that you actually like it when someone doesn't think you're so gorgeous?"

"You didn't mean it like you thought I was ugly," Sasuke explained. "Just that you were holding back."

Naruto shifted uncomfortably. Obviously he felt some kind of attraction to Sasuke, but it wasn't like he wanted to discuss it with him either. Sasuke must have thought he was going to get up because he caught his arm to hold him back, causing Naruto to look around at him. Sasuke wasn't smiling anymore.

"Those eyes of yours, I can never seem to get away from them," Sasuke told him. It was a compliment of sorts and it was weird to be getting one from Sasuke. He looked perfectly serious though as he stared into the subject of their conversation. "Your eyes tell me everything I need to know, it's how I know when you're lying to me most of the time. Sure I can hear it in your voice too, but your eyes give away so much of what you are feeling I doubt you or others know that this is the reason people tend to trust you automatically. Everything is laid bare when you look at someone and I cannot understand how you can so obviously lay yourself open to people."

Naruto's first thought was to think that Sasuke had gone crazy. But compliments from Sasuke were pretty rare so he decided to play along.

"It's just the way I am I guess."

"Exactly," Sasuke agreed reaching up to move a lock of hair away from Naruto's eyes. It was an oddly affectionate gesture. "Your every mood is reflected in your eyes just waiting for me to read." He paused for a moment, apparently reading. "Right now you want me to kiss you."

"I think you're projecting rather than reading," Naruto told him.

"You're lying."

"Yeah," Naruto swallowed, "I am."

They both leaned forward enough to make that soft contact with their lips. It had been a while since they'd shared a tender sort of kiss. Probably not since they'd started sleeping together actually and it was nice in all the right ways.

When it was over and Sasuke drew away, Naruto opened his eyes slowly to see Sasuke just sitting there watching him. It wasn't an expectant look which was good because he wasn't sure what would be expected after that. They didn't _have_ these sorts of moments. It was pretty rare when they even had a discussion together that wasn't either an argument or talking about sex. Sex and fighting, that was typically their thing. Naruto had always figured that was all Sasuke really wanted anyway and hadn't really thought anything about complimenting him or even just simply touching him for no sexual reason at all. It wasn't like Sasuke made a habit out of this sort of stuff either but if he thought back on it, it had been Sasuke who had always initiated each level of closeness they shared. There were probably quite a few reasons for this but only three really stuck out in his mind at this point.

The first reason was because Naruto had never had any sort of attachment like this with anyone ever and he really didn't know how things were supposed to go. Though he figured that not a lot of people had the same kind of relationship he shared with Sasuke. It wasn't a romantic thing, Sasuke had made that pretty clear. It wasn't a friendship exactly either, because simple friends didn't tend to have sex with each other a lot. At least not generally speaking. Whatever they had was cloaked in some kind of perverse gray area between the two and that made working out what was okay and what was too much a little difficult. Naruto had never had a romantic relationship before so he tended to treat their non-sex time the same way he'd treated Sasuke when they were friends, with an odd mixture of camaraderie, caring, and odium when Sasuke was being an asshole. So he didn't make any affectionate gestures and he was never the one that started the pre-sex teasing because simple friends just didn't do that.

The second thing was pretty basic. Sasuke just didn't seem the type to be very accepting of anything too affectionate that wouldn't immediately lead him into getting laid. Most of the time, that seemed to be the whole point of them getting together and mushy didn't seem to fit in with that view of what he really wanted. Until he did something like this of course.

The third and most important thing was that Naruto didn't want to scare him off. Which seemed absurd in a way. Every other conversation he had with Sasuke was telling him off or arguing with him so it seemed a little stupid that he would care that if he did something wrong as far as deep and meaningful conversations and affectionate touching was concerned. But fighting was something he was used to with Sasuke so maybe that's what made the difference. Sasuke wouldn't care about something they'd done since they were children, but something new could make things awkward.

So in the end he'd basically let Sasuke lead. Let Sasuke set the boundaries and offered nothing new in return. He still wasn't sure if that was a mistake but he did wonder if Sasuke might expect something more after giving his own little inch.

He wasn't quite up to compliments yet though, he wasn't sure how to go about it anyway. How could he tell another man he was handsome without it sounding mushy and girly? It made him wonder why he was even in this position. Like Sasuke had told him, Naruto should be able to figure out some of the reason why others instantly swooned over Sasuke because while he wasn't exactly swooning, he had sure been obsessed with the guy for long enough. And oh, that's right, he was fucking him too.

It wasn't even about that promise he made to Sakura anymore. Sure that was the main reason he'd told himself why he'd gone after Sasuke so doggedly at first, but that hadn't been it, not really. If he was honest with himself, he'd used Sakura's request as an excuse to do what he'd wanted to do anyway and it had allowed him to pursue Sasuke with an abandon that otherwise might have seemed a little fanatical to others had they not known about the obligation he was under. He could seem fanatical about a promise a lot more easily and unquestionably than the alternative. But it was an excuse. Sasuke had been special to him. Sasuke had pushed him to be better, faster, stronger, and more powerful just by being there and being better, faster, and stronger than Naruto to begin with. His friendship/rivalry was the first real bond he'd made with another person his age and the thought of losing that had been too crushing to contemplate.

Sasuke had been so perfect, so handsome, such a prodigy, so popular and basically everything else Naruto had never been in the eyes of anyone else. That Sasuke had ever begun to think of him as an equal had been one of the best times of his life. But how did any of that have any bearing on what they were doing now? He could put it all down to Sasuke taking the lead, he was the one who'd kissed him first, sure. And at first Naruto had been…flattered was probably the best word for it. He knew that Sasuke was pretty stand offish about getting close to people in a physical way and if that hadn't changed since when they were younger, then it was a pretty big deal for him to want Naruto. And he had, he'd seemed so rash, so impulsive to get some sort of contact with him that Naruto had at first thought to use it. He would have done anything for Sasuke to return to the village and he'd wanted Sasuke to know that too. He'd wanted Sasuke to want to come back and if that meant giving him something else he might want, then Naruto would do that. Being with Sasuke as it turned out hadn't been a chore, he'd enjoyed it and nothing about it had seemed weird or uncomfortable like he'd imagined it might.

The weird thing was that he almost saw it as the natural or maybe unnatural progression of his unhealthy obsession. Now he looked forward to spending time with Sasuke, lived for it sometimes and it wasn't just the bond, it couldn't have just an emotional level to it, there had to be something physical too. He remembered that time spent in the darkness, admiring the feel, the taste, the touch and the sensation. He remembered trying to picture him sitting in his lap sprawled out, discovering what that looked like through his hands and he had to admit, it had been pretty hot.

But putting any of that into words…

"Do you remember what I just told you about your eyes?" Sasuke said interrupting his thoughts.

For a disturbing moment Naruto thought maybe Sasuke had just read everything he'd been thinking off his eyeballs but then realized that Sasuke wasn't a mind reader and that was a stupid thing to think.

"Yeah, so?"

"You look thoroughly confused about something."

Naruto decided on something in that moment. For the next couple of days at least, he wasn't going to be led all the time. It would be his way of returning the compliment without actually saying anything just yet. And at the very least, Sasuke's reaction to his more forward approach might help him sort out a couple of things.

He reached down between them and took Sasuke's hand. The other man raised an eyebrow at the gesture but remained silent and didn't pull away. Together they turned toward the window and watched the snow continue to fall.

* * *

><p><em>Notes: okay that was a long chapter, longer than usual. Don't get used to it hehe. I just couldn't cut it off midway once I got rolling. I know this was a big slab of reading to get through too and I hope I didn't lose you all halfway through it. Anyway, things are moving along, albeit very very slowly, but to be honest when the first fic was written as a stand alone I sort of skipped to the sex right away and am now trying to attempt to write a backwards romance where you start with sex and then work back to an emotional bond rather than the other way around.<em>

_ Also you might have noticed that unlike my first two fics this one is not being wholly written from one person's perspective and I'm flipping between them whenever I feel like it. It's easier and because it's the last one gives it a nice sort of symmetry in a way._

_ Anyway, let me know what you think,_

_Dash._

_Special thanks to all of you who offered their beta reader services to me I REALLY appreciate the want to help. Nothing personal in my choice to who got it, just like last time it was first in who got the job. PJ was the lucky winnder and was the one who helped with out with this chapter so big thanks fo PJ for making this all readable once more!  
><em>


	3. Chapter 3

I'd Love You To Love To

By Dash

Chapter 3

The snow stopped just as evening fell, and the pair stopped what they were doing and watched the lack of snowflakes in the dimming evening light. For hours now they had been playing around with elemental chakra. Since the Land of Shadows and the elemental boost Naruto had given Sasuke's fire attack, Sasuke had apparently been keen to know just how he'd done it, but time hadn't been afforded to him in the past to ask or find out.

"It's typical that my element would make yours stronger. Couldn't be the other way around could it?" Naruto had said bitterly.

But the half assed training session had kept them occupied without the aid of sex or arguing for many hours now and the pair both seemed surprised that they had spent so much time talking and practicing.

"So much for exploring." Naruto lamented, joining Sasuke by the window to watch the now just barely visible sunset.

"There's always tomorrow."

"Yeah, you're right!" Naruto said perking up. Sasuke assumed he wasn't used to having all this time on his hands, that he forgot sometimes he didn't have to rush everything.

Sasuke caught sight of the steam rising off the spring through the windows and started to take off his shirt. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Naruto watching him and slowed down a little bit, giving his companion the best possible opportunity to watch as skin was exposed without giving the impression he was doing it on purpose.

"It'll be freezing outside," Naruto warned him once he let his shirt drop to the floor.

"Do I look like I care? It'll be warm in the water anyway."

Naruto smiled suddenly and nodded. He still hadn't put on a shirt or jacket since this morning but he was quick enough to start on his pants, all with hurried movements as though he could already feel the cold outside and was keen to get into the water. Once naked, he grabbed a couple of towels from the stack, wrapped one around his waist and turned to hand one to Sasuke, but Sasuke hadn't moved yet watching Naruto's eagerness with a faint smile.

To free up his hands, Naruto draped the extra towel over Sasuke's shoulder. He tugged on the laces of Sasuke's pants and let them fall around his feet and then grabbed his hand.

"C'mon before we freeze."

Sasuke was unprepared for this take-charge attitude and Naruto threw open the first set of doors that would lead them outside before he'd braced himself for the cold. It gave him chills immediately. He worked his hand free of Naruto's and wrapped his own towel around his waist and then shut the interior door just as Naruto opened the outer door into their private little bathing area. The cold was like a slap and stepping down onto the snow without bringing out shoes of any kind was a bit of a jolt as well, but it wasn't as bad as he imagined it was going to be. Sasuke followed Naruto over to the spring, letting his companion get to the spring first. He watched carefully as the towel was dropped by the side and saw nothing but uninterrupted tanned skin. Muscles flexed here and there as he moved to step down into the bath and Sasuke found himself quite content to watch for the moment. Naruto eventually spoiled it for him almost entirely by turning to him once he'd submerged most of himself in the water, and giving him a stupid expression.

"What?"

"Nothing," Sasuke replied dumping his own towel down on top of Naruto's and stepping in as well. The warm after the cold was almost more of a shock than the initial cold had been and it took him a little while to not feel like he was being roasted before he started to feel properly comfortable. He was about to lie back when his shoulders were grabbed and he was pulled back to instead lie against something else. Something else being Naruto. Sasuke might have complained a little except that this didn't seem like a hugging moment. He was lying back against Naruto with his head against the other's shoulder, but there were no arms wrapped around him, no other contact at all except for his head and his back against Naruto's chest and Sasuke found himself too comfortable to move, and too bewildered by Naruto's newfound attitude to care.

He wasn't really a touchy feely person but this he could handle. Casual touching was nice as far as he was concerned, and he was actually surprised that he was liking how much Naruto had gotten into the idea. He hadn't expected to feel that way actually. He supposed it had a lot to do with his trust issues that he didn't really like to be touched or grabbed much, but he'd never really had such reservations with Naruto because of the simple fact that he trusted him. If it had been anyone besides Naruto, they would have found the blade of a kunai pressed to their throat within two seconds of attempting this kind of contact.

"If you keep grabbing me I might start getting funny ideas," Sasuke told him.

"You already have funny ideas," Naruto told him in a half dreamy voice that indicated to Sasuke he was really relaxing in the bath.

"I'm trying to be a letch here if you don't mind."

"You already are a letch."

"You know if you said that to anyone else they wouldn't believe you."

Naruto seemed to think this over for a moment before replying. "Wow, you're right. Can you imagine if I told Sakura or Sai that you are perverted sex addict?"

Sasuke frowned. "Sai doesn't know me anyway, so who the hell cares what he thinks?"

This caused another pause. "I still don't get your problem with Sai. You're right, you don't know him, so how could you hate him so much? Okay sure, on first meeting Sai is kinda an asshole but he's not so bad in the end. Is it 'cause he took your place in the team? I'm surprised you'd care."

"I don't," Sasuke lied.

"You know Sakura-chan thinks he looks kinda like you, but I don't see it. I must be the only one though 'cause Ino thinks so too. I think she really likes him. Not as much as she still likes you of course, but still…"

"Dobe, I don't care," Sasuke interrupted briskly.

"You can't be jealous of him," Naruto scoffed with genuine insight for once. "You never wanted any of the girls from the village anyway. Or are you jealous of the team thing? I know you said you weren't but there's gotta be some reason you hate someone you haven't even properly met."

"You're right, I'm not interested in the girls and I don't care about the team, just drop it okay."

"Well, whatever. Just stop talking like you've already made up your mind about him. If it weren't for him, I would have been in the hospital so much more. We have this habit of saving each other now-"

"Just drop it would you!"

There was that annoying few moments of silence again while Naruto rearranged his thoughts. When he spoke again it was with a certain amount of smugness.

"You're jealous of him, because of me?"

"What? No!"

"Right, okay. But you know, I suppose he does look a little like you now that I think about it. And we became friends a lot quicker than you and I did. He actually reads books on how to impress us and get closer to us…"

Sasuke was planning to show his irritation at this conversation by the simple method of leaving the bath entirely, but Naruto threw an arm around his waist as he went to move.

"Just admit you're jealous and I'll stop," Naruto told him.

"You're lying," Sasuke informed him.

"Okay, I'm lying, I won't stop. Tell me why you aren't jealous of Sakura? Back in Team 7 you knew I liked her. Why aren't you jealous of her but you are about a new team member you never saw till just recently?"

"Call me crazy, but I just assumed you were more interested in guys these days."

"It has to be one or the other?" Naruto asked with some confusion.

"No, I guess not," Sasuke conceded.

"You don't like girls at all?"

Sasuke sighed. He couldn't leave while Naruto had hold of him without seriously trying to hurt him, and Naruto would just keep guessing if he didn't answer. He just had to be careful where this conversation went.

"I don't really like anyone."

"Um, my twisted spine kinda tells me you're lying. I don't mean have feelings for, just you know, attraction and stuff."

"People tend to annoy me and it's hard to feel any sort of attraction to them. You are…" _Careful, careful,_ "the only person I've been with by my own want. I was never exactly forced, I consented, but I would not have decided to participate by my own volition if I felt I had any real choice in the matter. In the past, I felt like I had to do it to further my ambition, and no you can't ask questions. And if you don't drop it right now, I will leave or drown you. Or both."

That shut Naruto up well enough. He didn't feel good about revealing so much and he wondered why he didn't just lie about it. He could have, Naruto wouldn't have known the difference and he wouldn't have had to share. But in the end, he just hadn't lied. Maybe because he had never met anyone who knew and would be sympathetic to what had happened to him. Maybe he'd just wanted someone who cared about him to know the truth. Whatever the reason, he didn't feel any better for sharing. At least not until Naruto said very softly:

"Sorry,"

"Why should you say 'sorry'?" Sasuke snapped.

"Because somebody has to."

To Sasuke's ears, it sounded like a stupid and simple explanation, but he did feel an unexpected rush of warmth that didn't come from sitting in a hot spring.

He relaxed again back against Naruto and didn't even flinch when this time Naruto wrapped both arms around his shoulders in an absurdly protective gesture. Sasuke didn't want to admit it, but It actually felt pretty nice.

* * *

><p>For once in a very long time, Sasuke didn't feel like starting anything that night. For some odd reason he just wasn't in the mood. It was probably a culmination of a lot of things that had happened throughout the day that made him want to hold back. Past experiences wouldn't stop floating through his head and to top that all off he found he was still bothered by Naruto's comments earlier about him being rough and pushy. So in the end he felt no eagerness to strip the other man naked and have his way with him like he usually would, and that bothered him a little. Actually it bothered him that everything else bothered him enough to not make the prospect appealing anymore. He kept telling himself that he shouldn't care and it shouldn't get to him, but here he was making no effort to get laid and getting ready to go to sleep instead.<p>

The bath had made him a little drowsy anyway and he was yawning by the time they came back inside to get into their robes. Naruto was looking at his map just after a maid had come in to spread out the bedding and deliver them a belated dinner, and looked up only when Sasuke lay back on the futon next to where Naruto was sitting, stretched, and closed his eyes.

"Aren't you going to eat anything? You haven't eaten all day."

It didn't come as a shock to learn this. For Sasuke, getting regular meals was something he was unused to considering his usual lifestyle so he didn't tend to think about food till he was really hungry. Being reminded about it now though caused his stomach to grumble a little. He turned onto his side and reached past Naruto's crossed legs to snag a dumpling off Naruto's plate. With his head held up in his hand he chewed the food and watched Naruto go back to studying his map.

"We won't have much time to have a look at the town tomorrow. Looks like the best place to camp up on the mountain will take the better part of the day to get to, even for us."

"We can stay here another night, there's no rush to move on."

Naruto dropped the map and started eating some food himself, but not before he passed another dumpling to Sasuke.

"Uh, there kinda is. I'm not real rich and staying here is pretty expensive."

"I have some money," Sasuke told him. "I may not get money from missions like you do, but I'm not above taking money from people bent on trying to kill me."

Naruto gave him a shocked look.

"Don't look so surprised. If somebody tries to kill me, the least of their worries is my robbing them afterwards. One person in particular who wanted to kill me and steal my body was really rich."

He'd apparently said the right thing. Killing and robbing Orochimaru would have been too good for Sasuke's old master in Naruto's eyes.

"Alright, one more night then. But the day after tomorrow I want to leave. It's not just the money, I don't like sitting around like this, I want to go out and explore."

Naruto finished his dinner and got up to turn the lights off. He left the small brazier in their room going though for the warmth and sat down on his futon next to Sasuke's. The light from the brazier lit the room with a soft orange light, highlighting Naruto's hair with a deep golden glow.

"How can you stand it?"

"Stand what?" Sasuke asked rolling onto his back to see Naruto better, arms stretched above his head, hands tucked beneath the pillow he was using.

"Sitting around, not doing much."

"Maybe because I so rarely get the chance to."

"Neither do I," Naruto told him.

"Yes, but you're hyperactive. I'm surprised you even stop to sleep."

"I'm not tired enough to sleep," he continued either not biting at Sasuke's comment or really listening in the first place.

"Then go play outside," Sasuke told him dismissively closing his eyes.

Naruto lay down on his side propped up on an elbow and smirked at him. "You think you're so funny and charming, I'll bet."

"I am," Sasuke replied not opening his eyes.

Sasuke felt the blankets covering him being dragged down a little to expose his chest and stomach to the cooler air of the room. After being so warm under the blankets it made him little cold. He didn't complain though because he felt a warm hand on his stomach, fingers gently moving.

"You're not so hot you know."

It wasn't often he heard that playful tone of voice from Naruto and he almost never had him touching him like this out of nowhere. All night and most of the day he'd been doing things like this when he never really would have before. His touches in their past encounters were usually a reaction to whatever Sasuke was doing to him, but in most instances today Sasuke had been doing nothing very suggestive, but Naruto had grabbed his hand a couple of times, pulled him in to lay against him, held him, and now was apparently teasing him out of his own want to. It did a lot to bring Sasuke out of his earlier mood of not wanting to start anything tonight. Just those simple touches, reassuring him that he wasn't actually pushing anything unwanted, wasn't forcing anything, was more of a relief to him than he would ever have imagined it would be. But at the same time, he was still determined to keep his hands to himself. He was curious as to where Naruto would take this on his own without being led. Would it stop at teasing, or would he want more? Of course being on the receiving end was a tough thing for Sasuke to handle emotionally, he could admit that much now. He also knew how badly he needed to get over that. He needed someone to take charge every now and again, someone he trusted so he could get over this fear of being physically and emotionally hurt and used. There was no room in his life for fear and he wouldn't be a slave to it anymore.

Sasuke smiled. "Yes I am."

"Your hair is pretty stupid, the way it sticks up at the back like that."

"Yours sticks up everywhere," Sasuke reminded him.

"You're so pale it's almost like a fish's underbelly."

"You're skin looks like you've spent a life as a farmer out in the sun all day."

"You don't eat enough, you're getting too skinny."

"All that ramen you eat, you're getting a little fat."

"I am not, you're such a liar."

"So are you."

"You're still a jerk."

"But you love me anyway," Sasuke returned. He still didn't open his eyes, he didn't want to see the look on Naruto's face.

"Yeah, right." Naruto replied sarcastically.

He'd wanted to hear it again and he didn't know why. Naruto had lied to him again and Sasuke very much believed Naruto didn't realize it yet.

He'd been shocked to hear the lie last night and at first he'd been aghast by the unintentional admission. That wasn't the point of this, it wasn't meant to be anything more than what it was right now, it was stupid to get attached and all the rest. But after hearing it last night, after the shock had worn off, all he'd wanted to do was be with him, feel him and kiss him. He'd had to have him right them, he couldn't help himself. He tried not to think too seriously about what that meant, but he'd wanted to make sure of what he'd heard last night and he'd also wanted to check his own reaction to it again now. He didn't feel disappointment like he'd expected, he felt…relieved?

He felt Naruto lean over him, felt the brush of lips against his and the whispered words, "You wish."

That was pretty true, he supposed. That relief he felt, it could only really mean one thing.

Still with his eyes closed, he moved his head up a little to make that contact with Naruto's lips again. They were soft and yielding, unlike the hand on his belly that had begun to creep downwards. At the first touch of that hand Sasuke gasped softly, breaking the kiss. And when no other kisses were forthcoming he opened his eyes, but Naruto had shifted downwards, laying a trail over kisses down his body, down over his chest, pausing briefly for lips to close over a nipple then move further downwards till he felt warm breath flutter against his rapidly hardening cock. He let his head fall back against the pillow as he felt a tongue lick it's way up the underside, a quick hot flick over the tip and then he felt those soft lips wrap around him and take him in.

This was the first time he'd received this kind of treatment from Naruto and it was most probably a first for Naruto too, but he was, Sasuke was very happy to admit, a little bit of a natural. There was no uncertainness, no hesitation as you might expect as he licked and sucked him into that warmth as though Sasuke were the best tasting thing in the world. Sasuke felt a finger tease his hole and then eventually slip inside. Sasuke couldn't stop himself and moaned loudly when Naruto found the right spot.

The noise surprised him a little. He didn't usually make much noise but he'd been a little caught up in sensation and couldn't help it.

After a little while Sasuke made himself very reluctantly sit up a little and say, "Stop."

Naruto raised his head almost immediately and asked, "What's wrong? Is it, not good?" His lips were a little shiny, his eyes a little glazed with desire.

"Too good," Sasuke replied dropping back onto the bedding. "You're making me want more."

Naruto grinned and climbed up in between his legs, over Sasuke's body and kissed him again. Knowing, and very much wanting what was about to happen, Sasuke drew his legs up bracing his lower body up a little till he could feel the insistent push of something far larger and more satisfying than fingers press against his opening. Naruto must have felt it too. He didn't break the kiss but after a moment pushed into him a little at a time. Sasuke was holding onto the arms Naruto was using to brace himself, and after he was all in Sasuke just gripped his arms more tightly, kissed him harder and gazed into those open eyes.

* * *

><p>The next morning Sasuke woke up very warm. By now he was used to waking up with a hand on Naruto, or fingers locked together, but this was the first time he'd woken up with the other man pressed flush against him. He'd been lying on his side and he could feel warm skin against him all the way from his back down to his legs. He was being spooned apparently. Well, not for long.<p>

He sat up and regretted it immediately. Not only was the morning air a little cold after letting the brazier burn out last night, but he was still a little sore from last night. It wasn't often he was in that position when they were together so he never really got used to it. Actually even before Naruto, he'd never really gotten used to it and Naruto was a little bigger in that department than anything previous so it always made him sore the next day. He never regretted it, but it was still uncomfortable.

"What's wrong?" Naruto asked sleepily before yawning hugely.

"Nothing," Sasuke muttered trying to shift into a more comfortable position.

Naruto sat up to face Sasuke, rubbing sleep from his eyes. He took in Sasuke's slightly pained expressed and saw the way he was sitting before laughing.

"Oh, shut up."

"Poor delicate little Sasuke."

Sasuke gave up on sitting and Naruto's taunting and got up to get dressed. Or at least tried to. Naruto chose that moment to lay back down and stretch. The blankets were down around his legs and the sight was a little distracting.

"Actually I could do with a bath before breakfast," Sasuke said instead dropping his clothes.

Naruto agreed and after they'd had a soak, Sasuke had his breakfast and Naruto ate some actual food, they got dressed and headed off into town.

It was weird for both of them, walking down the street together in broad daylight. It was something neither of them had done since Sasuke was a part of team 7 and that was to be seen in public together, on a street, in the middle of a village during the day when anyone could see them.

For Sasuke, being able to walk down any street without having to fear ambush was a bonus any day, but for Naruto it made them being here together not such the dream it always felt like, but cold light reality. It made him happy in a way, but also made him depressed in another. This was something they would never do back home, simply walking down the street because it reminded him what he'd lost and what Sasuke had become. It made him think about the future too.

Normally he wouldn't let it bother him too much because what he and Sasuke had together was not a romantic relationship according to Sasuke's in no way vague hinting. It was only ever supposed to be for fun apparently, but Naruto had become addicted to that kind of fun, and being able to spend time with his friend. He had hoped that this little trip was going to cure him of that for better or worse, but at this point he had a hard time believing that would happen. As far as he could see he had two options open to him, neither of which were pleasant. He could break whatever they had off completely and move on, or continue and therefore continue to let it affect his work, his other relationships with his friends, and let himself become vulnerable to his enemy, in more ways than one. Of course there was always a third option, he could make this little vacation permanent and never go back to the village. But then what? Even if he could find it in himself to abandon his village and his friends what would he and Sasuke do? Sasuke wouldn't give up his own mission for Naruto and that meant he might have to fight against his village. He couldn't do that, no way, not even for Sasuke.

"Dobe, you asleep or something?"

Naruto came out of his thoughts to find Sasuke had grabbed his arm to stop him in the street.

"No, why?"

"Isn't that the weapons shop you wanted to go to?" Sasuke asked closely watching his face.

Mindful of what Sasuke had told him of being able to read his eyes, Naruto grinned and scratched the back of his head.

"Oh, yeah. Must have zoned out. C'mon, I want to see if they have any of those special kunai Tenten told me about."

Naruto found a knife he liked the look of. It was a simple little thing of blackened steel with braided green cloth around the hilt. Just above the hilt the village emblem of the volcano had been stamped. He bought two of them, giving the second one to Sasuke as they walked back toward where they were staying.

"What's this for?" Sasuke asked taking the weapon suspiciously.

Naruto shrugged. "A souvenir." He said simply. He half expected Sasuke to scoff at him or refuse to take it. But Sasuke surprised him by looking the weapon over and tucking it into his belt.

"Thanks."

* * *

><p>Their last night at the resort went pretty much the same way as the two previous nights. They spent a little time playing with chakra and even more time in the springs. Naruto was very tired the next morning when he awoke. When he got up, he looked eagerly out the window checking to see if it was snowing. It wasn't. The sky was a clear bright blue and though the ground still had snow on it, it didn't look like it was going to start up again anytime soon.<p>

He grabbed Sasuke's shoulder and shook it to wake him.

"What?"

"Breakfast and then packing. Today I want to go up the mountain."

It took Sasuke a few moments to wake up and then focus on what Naruto had just said to him. When he did he gave Naruto that smug half smile.

"Did you say breakfast?"

After Naruto ate some food, they packed their belongings and got ready to head out. Sasuke didn't look happy about it. He would have preferred to stay here the rest of the week where it was warm, dry, and could at least spend the time fucking in relative comfort. He'd gotten used to being here with Naruto and he was sorry to see that time gone. But Naruto was set and Sasuke figured he might as well go along.

The snow didn't slow them down any and they made good time up the path Naruto had chosen. They were about halfway to where Naruto said there was a cave they could use as cover for the night when they felt the ground quake a little.

Both stopped and stared up at the mountain.

"Do you think that's a bad sign?" Naruto asked Sasuke.

"They might have quakes all the time around here, who knows. It wasn't much of a rumble."

Naruto shrugged and they both continued on. The next one wasn't so subtle.

After Sasuke regained his balance, and Naruto picked himself up out of the snow, they looked at one another and then at the mountain again.

"I don't think that was a good sign." Naruto said.

"Uh-huh."

"C'mon you felt that quake, you know what it means."

"What, that the volcano is going to blow up unexpectedly? No, never," Sasuke said sarcastically.

And then the mountain did blow up unexpectedly. Well not blow up, but a vent in the side opened up and a bright red gush went up along with it. It was beautiful in a way, but disturbing in every other way.

"I thought these things gave off more warnings than this!" Naruto said scowling up at the bright red lava flow.

""For all we know there could have been earthquakes all over the mountain for weeks before we showed up. We might have been having little tremors the last few days and not noticed it in the town." Sasuke pointed out.

"We have to warn the town," Naruto said watching the oncoming lava flow with determination.

"You think they aren't aware that the volcano has erupted? I think the entire continent is aware that the volcano has erupted, Dobe."

"So? That doesn't mean they're prepared or can evacuate in time."

"If they aren't prepared for this they're morons," Sasuke told Naruto dismissively. "They live next to an active volcano, what did they think was going to happen?"

"Doesn't mean they deserve to die, Teme."

"Doesn't it?"

Naruto frowned at Sasuke, not quite believing what he was hearing.

"You think the entire town deserves to die just because of where they live."

"I didn't say that. But nature does seem to have methods of killing off the terminally stupid."

Naruto's frown deepened and Sasuke sighed.

"Look we only have a couple of days left, do you really want to waste that time helping villagers to move house?"

"Yes," Naruto replied obviously. "My holiday isn't more important than other people's lives. We can see each other again, it's hardly a contest."

"Yeah right, when?"

"Are we really having this discussion? Are you seriously bitching about a spoilt vacation when people's lives are in danger?"

"Like I said, they live next to a volcano, they'd be idiots not to be prepared for something like this. I just don't think we should waste what little time there is helping people that probably don't need it."

"You can't know that for sure and it isn't worth the risk. Like I said, even if it takes us all the days we have left to help the village, we'll see each other again."

"Not like this,"

"You know we could if you just came back to the village. The only one making this difficult is you!" Naruto snapped finally losing his patience both with Sasuke and the situation. "_You've_ got the twisted priorities. I might think possibly saving hundreds of lives is more important than our time together. You obviously don't agree. All you think is more important than this is your own never ending quest for personal revenge. Orochimaru is dead, your brother is dead, so many are dead but you just won't let it go!"

"My entire clan was killed, don't you get that? My revenge won't end until every last person responsible is dead!"

"You're insane, don't _you_ get it? You'll always find more people to blame because no matter how many people you kill the pain never stops. You think that's because you haven't finished but it's because there is no quick fix for what you've suffered. Even if you set fire to the entire world, that pain will never go away. But we care about you in the village, we can help you!"

"I don't need your help! I told you I'm never coming back, I don't know why you keep asking."

"Because I…I want you to come back. I _need_ you to come back Sasuke, don't you get that by now?"

"If you've been harboring this hope all this time that I'll come back, that all this running around and hiding was only temporary, you're in for a big shock."

It was in that moment, that Sasuke made Naruto see the truth of what he'd been doing. Somewhere in the back of the mind he had thought that all of this running around, meeting in secret and lying _was_ only going to be temporary. There had been a part of him that believed that one day Sasuke would come back, and all would be right with the world once more. He realized the truth and then he realized the truth of what Sasuke had just told him. Did he really want to spend the rest of his life this way, or at least as long as it took powerful ninja to finally hunt down and kill Sasuke? Because that's what would happen. The best he could hope for at this point would be a couple more years of sleepless nights and sneaking around until one day the letters stopped coming and he would get word that Sasuke was dead. Could he really live like that? Did he want to anymore? This would just go on, sex, uncertainty and fighting before he suffered even more pain and lost him for good.

It was like a physical slap across the face when he realized that no, he didn't want that anymore. The possibility for more pain was too great and he couldn't continue to live like that.

Sasuke had been watching his face closely and apparently didn't like what he was seeing.

"I didn't mean for you to have a heart attack right this instant," he told Naruto uncertainly, a lot calmer than he had been a few moments ago.

The lava was drawing ever so slowly closer to them, ash was falling from the sky and the air was getting harder to breathe. He had to leave now to give himself and the village the most time he could, but there was just one more thing he had to do before he left.

Sasuke was watching him a little warily. Not because he expected Naruto to get violent, but he must have realized that his hastily spoken words must have had a big impact on his companion. He would be too proud to admit it, but he was deeply regretting saying what he did.

But it had been the truth, and Naruto knew it was better for him to hear it now rather than later. It made the decision between his two options easier at least.

"You're right, I've been stupid. You'll never want to come back, you don't need to and you'd never love…" Naruto was pretty angry with himself, more so than at Sasuke, so he made himself calm down. Naruto walked up to him gave him a brief but tender kiss and turned away.

"Goodbye, Sasuke."

Sasuke watched Naruto leave with a dumbfounded look on his face. By the time he'd thought to call out for the other to wait, it was way too late.

* * *

><p>The village was in disarray when Naruto returned. Sasuke hadn't come after him and he was surprised that he actually felt glad about that. It had all been said and done, and now, so were they.<p>

He helped where he could and the villagers starting moving out. The lava would take a while to get to them but there were a lot of villagers to move and a lot of possessions to help carry. It took a long time for them to get clear of the danger, and Naruto didn't see Sasuke in the entire time.

When he was about to leave with the last of the villagers, he looked up at the mountain playing with the dagger he'd bought and thought about leaving the thing behind. He really didn't want the reminder.

Eventually he tucked it into his pouch and turned away. Well, someday he might want it.

* * *

><p>"How was the holiday?" Kakashi asked.<p>

Naruto considered lying for a moment, but he just didn't really have it in him anymore. They had met near the gates of Konoha just days after Naruto's return, ready to head out on another mission. The whole team was gathered together.

"I stayed in a five star resort with a gorgeous brunette for a couple of days then went for a hike up a volcano which exploded while I was standing on it. I helped evacuate the village, became a hero and came home."

His teammates were shocked into silence for a good couple of minutes before Sakura snorted and said:

"Yeah, right. A volcano huh? And as if you would know what to do with a girl even if you could find someone stupid enough to like you. You probably spent the entire time on your ass in some crummy Inn somewhere with a box of ramen in front of a TV."

Naruto forced a smile and shrugged. "Hah, you got me there Sakura-chan."

"Now if we're done with catching up, you three might like to know about today's mission."

* * *

><p>In the time following, Naruto got the occasional unsigned letter that was obviously from Sasuke, but he threw them away as soon as he got them without reading them. He'd lost that addiction he'd felt before. It had become something more of a dull ache rather than an intense hurt now and while he didn't find it very easy to throw those letters away, it got a little easier as time went by to ignore the pain. As the years passed, the frequency of the letters dwindled until they eventually stopped altogether. Occasionally he heard reports of someone spotting Sasuke, sometimes very near the village. Naruto found it unlikely that Sasuke had risked his life to come and see him, but it was a possibility that he was the reason behind the sightings.<p>

Occasionally he made a show of still searching for Sasuke for Sakura's sake but it was halfhearted and he was careful not to follow any leads that might actually be useful. It was hard to do, getting Sakura's hopes up only to keep failing. But Naruto knew Sasuke would never come back and he was just hoping for the day that Sakura would realize that for herself and save herself the more painful way of finding out the same way Naruto had.

This was the end of chasing Sasuke for Naruto, the end of that obsession, the end of wanting him, needing him and…everything….

_The End…._

_haha, got ya, not yet it isn't. Stayed tuned for the next chapter!_

* * *

><p><em>Notes: Yeah I know, I'm a terrible and cruel and bad person. No I'm not ending it there, how could I? There is at least one more but probably two chapters to come so keep an eye out and we'll get this thing settled. Don't forget to <strong>review<strong>. **Please. **I love hearing everyone's feedback so much so please feed my addiction and I will do my best to help you feed yours_

_Dash._


	4. Chapter 4

I'd Love You To Love To

Chapter 4

Sasuke sat by the waterfall, frowning deeply and staring at the dagger in his right hand. He took in every detail of that dagger while he glared at it to the point that he could have sketched the detailing of the hilt and the crest stamped into the blade all with his eyes closed. He stared at the dagger often these days, torn between keeping it with him and throwing the blasted thing off a cliff. Every time he went to get rid of it, he found himself unable to do it, unwilling to part with it as though it were a certain part of his life he couldn't bring himself to throw away.

It was why he was here at the falls. In his last letter to Naruto he'd told him that he'd be here on the same day every year, waiting to pay up what he owed. Naruto hadn't turned up that first year. Actually this was Sasuke's fourth visit to the falls since he'd sent that letter and unsurprisingly this was going to be the forth year he waited in vain. He'd been here for three days already hoping that this year would be different, this year Naruto would show up, but deep down Sasuke had known it had been a wasted effort to come here even that first year.

This year nothing would change, he knew that, but he still kept coming back here year after year hoping for the first time in his life to be proved wrong.

He hated himself for coming here. He hated everything about this dependency he had on another person and he absolutely hated the fact that he couldn't just forget all about it now that it was apparently over. He hadn't wanted to get attached, but he had despite his best efforts not to. And just when he'd started to think that such an attachment might not be so stupid after all, he'd screwed it up by being stubborn, hardhearted and distant.

Basically he'd screwed it up by being himself.

Perfect Uchiha Sasuke, so good at everything, only ever seemed to fuck up was what _really_ important to him. Probably because he never realized what was truly important till it was too late. He'd done the same thing with Itachi, he'd assumed nothing but the worst and didn't find out anything different till after he'd killed him. The pain and anguish he'd felt finding out Itachi had done everything to protect him had been all consuming.

Of course his situation with Naruto was very different, and it didn't cause as much heart ache, but he knew that if he left things as they were now he would just be heading down the same track. Sasuke would carry out his mission to destroy the leaf, Naruto would try and stop him, and he would kill Naurto. Again someone who had done nothing, but try to save him. The only difference this time was that Sasuke knew all the facts ahead of time and this time he had a decision to make. He would not have killed Itachi if he had known the truth, so why would he kill Naruto knowing what he knew now? Of course that decision might have been made easier for him if Naruto hadn't walked away from him.

At first he'd thought it would be for the best. He was getting emotionally involved and considering the path he'd chosen for himself, it was stupid of him to have any sort of relationship with someone he should have thought of as an enemy.

But almost as soon as he had left the mountainside, he'd wanted to go back. He hadn't though, he'd pushed himself onwards and away hoping to accomplish with distance what he had been unable to accomplish through iron will.

Having some distance between them hadn't made much difference in the end. He'd tried to find other 'entertainment', but had been unable to work up enough interest to go through with any of it. He'd tried to close himself off entirely from any emotion other than his hatred, but it became rapidly more difficult to nurture hatred for the leaf village knowing who would protect that village to their last breath.

So he'd put off that particular part of his revenge again and again, hoping to rekindle his hatred and his need for revenge. He waited and waited, but his hatred for the village, the only emotion he'd wanted to keep a hold of was the only one that seemed to fade as time went by.

It had been mere months since they'd parted on the mountainside when Sasuke had written to Naruto again.

_Meet me at the waterfall_

_ We need to talk._

He'd waited there a week and Naruto had not shown up. At first Sasuke had just assumed he hadn't gotten the letter or had been out on a mission and hadn't received it yet. But as the week had worn on, Sasuke realized that Naruto had never intended to come. He had either decided not to come or hadn't even bothered to read the letter.

That had made Sasuke angry.

Sasuke did not get ignored by anyone, least of all by some dobe who spent the better part of the two years before their reunion in the Land of Shadows obsessively chasing after him. Sasuke wouldn't stand for it. He'd sent another letter.

_You owe me dobe, come to me now!_

And still nothing. Sasuke left the Land of Shadows wanting never to go back to that place and vowing to forget all about what had almost happened between them.

His anger at Naruto had lasted two months.

_I'm close to the village,_

_You need to talk to me._

Nothing. Then…

_ I need to talk to you._

Still nothing. By this stage it had been a year, and Sasuke no longer felt any anger about anything. In fact he was starting to feel nothing at all except shame and regret. The next letter had cost him a lot to write, but he couldn't think of anything else to try that might get through to him. He knew that if Naruto didn't respond, he was no longer reading the letters. It simply said:

_Please._

No reply. He was fairly sure after that particular show of weakness that he was writing his letters to Naruto's bin.

It didn't stop him from writing the letters, but he didn't write as often. The letters got longer. Instead of three lines of text, he wrote long letters. Knowing that they would probably never be read, he did something he never did, something he never even knew he was capable of, he shared. He wrote about everything. He wrote about trivial news, rumors, he wrote about what he was doing, where he was going, and most importantly he wrote about how all of that made him think and made him feel.

His one-sided letter writing went on for almost a year, gradually lessening throughout that year before he decided to stop sending them altogether. He wrote one last letter telling Naruto where he would be on this particular day every year and then stopped. At least he stopped sending them, but not writing them. Getting things down on paper helped him sort through things, and kept him sane, but he could no longer stand the idea that his thoughts and feelings were being tossed away once they reached their destination.

By not actually sending the letters, he only had to deal with his pathetic and pointless hope once a year, and that hope dwindled every single year he was forced to spend a solitary few days by the waterfall in the Land of Shadows. But this year his hope seemed to die, and despair replaced it instead.

He had been hoping for something to happen that would never happen again. Naruto would no longer go out on a limb for him because Sasuke had given him very little reason to want to.

There was one way to maybe salvage some of that hope. He had wanted Naruto to have faith in him again; perhaps it was time for Sasuke to have a little faith in Naruto instead.

* * *

><p>Izumo liked gate duty most of the time. It was a fairly uneventful job that gave him time to sit around catch up on his thoughts and reflect on life. However, because it <em>was<em> such an uneventful job he also often found it quite boring too when he didn't have much to think about.

Kotetsu was asleep, snoring away with his head on the guard desk with not a care in the world. Izumo just put his head in his hand, sighed deeply, and watched the road.

Eventually a figure came along, walking down the path in such an unhurried and casual way that Izumo took little notice of him at first. It wasn't till he got a little closer that he thought the man looked somehow familiar though couldn't place the face. Still, people passing through the village was a pretty regular occurrence these days, and so long as whoever this was passed the security checks and signed the book, it was hardly going to be an issue letting him in even if he didn't belong to the village.

He got closer still, and Izumo could make out his features a little more clearly. Yeah, there was definitely something familiar about him…something in the back of his mind that was telling him that this wasn't the usual kind of visitor, something that was telling him to pay attention.

The nagging thought was enough to get him to his feet and nudge Kotetsu awake as he left the guardhouse and stood nearer to the gate.

The stranger stopped in front of him, took his sword, still in its scabbard, and held it out in front of him.

He didn't say anything, just held the sword out and gazed at Izumo with a steady dark gaze. Obviously this person was surrendering his weapon which was normal practice for a stranger entering the village but Izumo hadn't reached out to take it yet. He'd just realized why this person looked so familiar. It had taken him a while because he hadn't seen him since he was about twelve or thirteen but now that he had the name there was no denying that this man was the grown up version of what that child looked like all those years ago.

"Uchiha Sasuke?"

He heard the rattle of a chair falling from inside the guardhouse at the name, and in the blink of an eye Kotetsu was behind the Uchiha with a blade pressed firmly against his spine.

Sasuke hadn't moved since holding out the weapon though, hadn't even blinked when Kotetsu had appeared behind him. He just calmly stared at Izumo, waiting for his weapon to be taken.

Izumo took the weapon carefully, aware of any tricks but none were forthcoming. When Sasuke's hands were empty he pressed his wrists together as though waiting to have them tied.

Izumo's first thought was that this couldn't be real. This man had been hunted by the leaf village for years, and here he was just calmly surrendering himself as though it were no big deal.

So with a mixture of suspicion and plain surprised curiosity, Izumo asked, "Why have you returned?"

At this Sasuke's face went a little hard, but his voice barely gave any feeling as he replied, "Because I am trying to have faith in blind optimism for once."

"What?" Izumo replied mystified.

Sasuke eventually broke eye contact, closing his eyes completely. "Because I am an idiot."

Well, Izumo could certainly agree there.

* * *

><p>"You can't treat me like one of your students anymore," Naruto told Iruka after he'd complained to him again about how many missions he'd been going on lately. Naruto didn't think he was volunteering too much, but apparently he was the only one. "You just don't like forking out for ramen every time I come back. Bet you think it's a bad tradition now, huh?"<p>

"I still remember that energetic little boy that I had to yell at to pay attention in class," Iruka told him with a hint of fondness.

Naruto finished his mouthful of ramen and grinned. "You told me off yesterday for not paying attention to Granny Tsunade, Iruka sensei."

"Oh, right, I forgot about-"

"Naruto Nii-chan!" Naruto turned to see Konohamaru running down the street, red in the face and eyes wide. When he eventually got to them he could barely breathe.

"What's wrong, Kono how far did you run?"

"I was coming in from a mission, but I saw them at the front gates and came here to tell you as soon as I could. They've caught him! They really caught him!"

"Caught who?"

"Uchiha Sasuke. Apparently he just wandered in the gate this morning, and handed over his weapons. They're escorting him to the Hokage right now!"

Kono could have slapped him across the face with a wet fish and he wouldn't have been more surprised than he was right now. He couldn't have spoken if he'd wanted to. Luckily Iruka wasn't so restrained.

"He just surrendered?"

"That's what they said. He –"

But Naruto didn't stay to hear the rest, as soon as the information had hit home, Naruto was off running through the streets toward the Hokage's mansion. He got there just as the slow procession from the main gate was walking their prisoner up toward the front doors.

He stopped short of running up to the procession entirely and stood with the rest of the small crowd to watch. There was no mistaking who it was. Sasuke had really surrendered himself.

Naruto didn't know if Sasuke could sense him or was just looking around at the crowd, but he lifted his head and caught sight of Naruto. The scowl that had been on his face softened and he gave Naruto that jerky little smirk that Naruto hated so much.

He probably could have gone with Sasuke to see the Hokeage - who could really stop him? - but he couldn't will himself to follow the procession.

After Sasuke had disappeared inside, he felt a hand on his shoulder and Sakura appeared by his side. She looked like she had run from home to be here, clear on the other side of the village.

"Was it really him? Did you see him?"

Naruto nodded, unable to say anything and just stared at the doors Sasuke had disappeared through.

* * *

><p>After standing around with the crowd for a little while, Naruto had decided to go home. He wasn't sure how long he spent staring out of the window because he wasn't really paying attention to the view. But when he finally did take notice he saw it was dark outside. He got up and flipped on the nearest light blinking for a few moments in what seemed like a harsh glare after the darkness. He hadn't heard any news on what had happened to Sasuke after he'd gone to see the Hokage but he didn't imagine he'd been killed or anything, not even after being branded a traitor for so long. Most likely he'd been interrogated and thrown into the cells beneath the mansion for the night.<p>

Naruto had decided to go pay him a visit. He had a feeling that trying to ignore Sasuke this time just wasn't going to work.

On his way through the mansion toward the lower levels he saw Kakashi heading down the hall towards him. Of course Kakashi was here, Naruto realized, he had probably been here when Sasuke had been bought in.

"I was just on my way out to see you," Kakashi told him stopping in the hall in front of him. "I thought you might have turned up before now."

"I was at home thinking," Naruto told him staring at the carpet in between them.

Kakashi raised an eyebrow at that particular statement. It was an odd thing for Naruto to say, but considering the circumstances, he couldn't really be surprised.

"Right. Here, I found these in Sasuke's things."

Kakashi handed him a black bag. Out of curiosity Naruto opened it up surprised to see it was filled with nothing but envelopes. Some looked a little crumpled like they'd been in the bag for a long time. He picked out one at random and looked at the front. Printed in Sasuke's impeccably neat handwriting on the front was Naruto's name and a date. It was dated as being more than two years old. Naruto dropped that one back in and picked up another. Again it had Naruto's name and a date from a couple of months ago.

"What's this?" Naruto asked thoroughly confused.

"Nobody has read them yet, not even me. Since all the letters seem to have your name on them I figured you could sort through them and see if there is anything important we might need to know."

The fact that Kakashi had done this for him when everything else Sasuke owned was probably being examined with a microscope wasn't lost on Naruto. He felt a little guilty because he knew Kakashi could get in trouble because of him.

"Why was Sasuke carrying a bag full of letters with my name on them?"

"I have no idea. I'm hoping you'll be able to answer that for me."

"Uh, okay."

Kakashi started past him back the way Naruto had come. "Night. And good luck."

"Yeah, thanks."

* * *

><p>He didn't exactly have permission to enter the cells to see Sasuke, but Granny Tsunade apparently knew him well enough. If he wasn't allowed in to see Sasuke then Naruto would probably force his way in so Tsunade had left word to allow him entry just to forgo any potential violence or destruction.<p>

The guards let him through and respectfully went further up the corridor and out of sight in order to give the two old acquaintances some privacy. Naruto walked up to the only occupied cell, and dropped the bag he was carrying onto the ground.

Sasuke was sitting on the floor against the far wall when Naruto stepped up to the bars. Just like before, the sight of Sasuke almost stole his breath away. Naruto could see some of the more obvious signs of interrogation, but he still looked heart achingly good, despite appearing like the most unkempt person on earth. He had been marked by the interrogation, and had dried blood here and there on his clothes and skin. His clothes and skin also looked filthy like he hadn't bathed in days. His hair was a little longer than usual and appeared somewhat greasy and a little knotty. But despite this, Naruto wanted to reach out and touch that skin he knew would be cool and yielding. He wanted to smooth the matted hair back away from his face, and remember how it used to feel soft and feathery in his fingers. Very few girls would gush over Sasuke in his current state, but one guy certainly might. However, Sasuke's appearance was not something he wanted to dwell on right now. He had to focus.

He gripped the bars in a white knuckled grip, surprised and angry at how difficult this was. He wanted to think the best of Sasuke, but he knew the other man too well to not at least suspect something untoward.

"What are you doing here?"

Sasuke looked up at him at the sound of his voice. He looked very tired as though the interrogation had taken a lot out of him. Sasuke still seemed surprised by the question though. "Hello to you too. Long time no see."

Naruto didn't respond.

Sasuke frowned at the lack of greeting and answered the question. "What am I doing here? I thought that was pretty obvious."

"Are you trying to pull something? Are you here to kill someone?"

Sasuke sighed, "I trust you, why don't you trust me?"

"Because I know you," Naruto replied bluntly.

"I'm here because_ someone _wasn't replying to my letters anymore. And I knew you weren't dead. You're pretty famous by now and I assumed I would have heard about it."

Naruto let that answer sink in for a moment. Sasuke didn't seem overly pleased to see him, but he hadn't expected Sasuke to run over and kiss him either. He'd been shunning Sasuke for a while before the other ninja had come back to the village, and in all the time they'd been apart he could only imagine what he'd been through in his own life as a renegade ninja. It didn't matter how many friends Sasuke might still have in the village, he was a traitor, and would be treated as a hostile enemy until the higher ups decided his fate for him.

When Naruto had been younger, he'd just imagined that everything would be all right if Sasuke would just come back. He had since realized just how naive that had been. Important people were very pissed off at Sasuke, and with very good reason. Naruto hadn't been the only one making a name for himself these past couple of years.

"You said you'd never return to the village. You had no reason to want to come back."

Sasuke got painfully to his feet and walked slowly toward the bars. He put his hands over Naruto's, but Naruto moved his hands almost immediately.

Sasuke's dark eyes narrowed a little. "I thought you'd be happier to see me," Sasuke said with a hint of anger in his voice.

"I don't buy it. You were so adamant to stay away, how did that change?"

"I suppose it changed when I realized fun wasn't enough for you anymore. You left because I said I wouldn't come back here. You think I meant that I wouldn't come back for you, that was a stupid misunderstanding, one that could have been resolved if you'd bothered to read any of my letters. I bet you threw them all away."

"I did. And I didn't leave because of a misunderstanding. I left because I didn't want to live like I was anymore. I was getting attached and we both know it. I didn't want to have to live lying and sneaking around all the time. That's not a life."

"I wasn't worth it, I get it."

The sullen tone wasn't lost on Naruto, but he wasn't going to be played by Sasuke again. He wouldn't fall for it this time. "You're right, you weren't. And I realized that the moment you turned your back on that village. Don't pretend you came back because of me. I was just a bit of entertainment, remember?"

"You have a very selective memory, Dobe."

"Fine, you want me to believe you came back because of me? What took you so long? It's been years, Sasuke."

"You think I could turn my back on everything I was trying to accomplish in a heartbeat? Besides, I might die here because of this little stunt. It takes a long time for a person to decide to die. Even for you, it takes that long."

"You're crazier than I remember. Either that or you're lying."

"Fine, don't believe me. Just give me what I came here for."

Naruto almost smiled at that one. "I'm not fucking through iron bars, Teme."

"I've changed my deranged priorities a little." Sasuke told him a little testily. "Come here."

Naruto did so, not entirely sure what to expect. But he realized he must have trusted Sasuke more than he'd let on because an angry Sasuke could have killed him through the bars. Instead he felt a hand on the back of his neck that urged his head forward enough to receive a kiss. It was just as he remembered it, cool lips and all. It was almost enough to make him forget why he was so mad.

It didn't last long but it made his mind reel.

When Sasuke let him go he stepped back from the bars, unable to understand this new Sasuke, unwilling after all that time trying to forget about him, to believe what he was saying.

"I thought I understood you, but I don't think I ever did or will."

Sasuke opened his mouth to speak, but something caught his attention. The black bag Naruto had dropped onto the ground near his cell.

"Do you know what's in there?" Sasuke asked gesturing to the bag.

"Letters," said dismissively.

"Have you read them?"

"No. Kakashi gave me the job of going through them since you wrote my name all over them. What are they?"

A tired sort of half smile was his answer to the question. "Read them, they will give you…understanding."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Go home, Naruto. I am back in the village and I will get to see you tomorrow and everyday after, just like you promised, until I die."

Naruto knew that Sasuke realized just how soon that might be. He couldn't think of anything else to say, so he followed Sasuke's advice and went home.

TBC

* * *

><p><em>Sorry to leave it off there, there's another chapter coming so hang tight. Thanks to everyone that reviewed, I guess I threw you all for a bit of a loop when years passed but I wanted them to have some time apart.<em>

_ So Sasuke is back but it seems as though a lot of people are really pissed off with him so I guess the question now is whether Naruto can save him or even whether he really wants to._

_Please review._

_- Dash. _


	5. Chapter 5

I'd Love You To Love To

Chapter 5

When Naruto had gotten home from seeing Sasuke it was still in the very early hours of the morning. He hadn't imagined he'd be able to get any sleep, but he'd decided to lie down anyway and attempt it. He must have been more tired than he'd imagined because soon afterwards he'd fallen asleep and started to dream.

"_I know you'll come back. You know how much I care. I wouldn't have even tried to prove anything to you if I didn't."_

_ "Tell me you want this. Tell me you're doing this for no other reason than you want to."_

"_I want to." _

"_That's the second time you've lied to me, why do you bother when you know I can tell?"_

"_Because when I tell you the truth you don't really listen. But when I lie, you immediately believe the opposite. It's easier to tell you the truth if I lie to you."_

"_That made no sense."_

"_Of course it doesn't make sense. Nothing I do when I am around you makes any kind of sense to me!"_

"_Nothing is wrong, I trust you."_

"_Do you know how many people I've told that I trust them?"_

"_No."_

"_None."_

"_Nobody who really knows me ever really…never mind."_

"_That's your problem. You don't let anyone get to know you."_

"_You don't think you really know me by now?"_

"_I know as much about you as you let me know. You choose what you share, so I only know as much as you choose for me to know. That's not really the same thing."_

"_It's nice to know you think I have that much control over myself when I am around you. I'm usually careful around everyone. With you, sometimes being careful doesn't always work."_

"_I suppose that's sort of flattering. It would have been better though if you didn't feel the need to be careful at all. What's wrong with just being yourself?"_

"_That is being myself. It's just the way I am. You actually get me to not be my usual self mostly."_

"_Is that better?"_

"_It's…singular."_

"_If you came back to the village and we saw each other every day, would you still want this? We would see each other all the time and have a real bed for once with sheets and pillows instead of dirt and stone. But would it be the same. Would you even like that? Would I?"_

"_It wouldn't suck."_

"_I'm not some brainless groupie that follows your every word and gesture with moon eyes and you know it."_

_ "Which is why I'm here with you, and not off with some brainless groupie."_

_ "Wait a minute, last time we talked about this you said this was just some entertainment, some fun. So why does it matter who it's with?"_

_ "Does it surprise you that I find actually being able to talk to someone who doesn't just blindly follow my every whim to be part of that fun?"_

_ "Yes."_

_ "And here I thought you knew me better than most."_

"_Those eyes of yours, I can never seem to get away from them. Your eyes tell me everything I need to know, it's how I know when you're lying to me most of the time. Sure I can hear it in your voice too, but your eyes give away so much of what you are feeling I doubt you or others know that this is the reason people tend to trust you automatically. Everything is laid bare when you look at someone, and I cannot understand how you can so obviously lay yourself open to people."_

_ "It's just the way I am I guess."_

_ "Exactly. Your every mood is reflected in your eyes just waiting for me to read."_

"_Sorry,"_

"_Why should you say 'sorry'?"_

"_Because somebody has to."_

"_You don't eat enough, you're getting too skinny."_

"_All that ramen you eat, you're getting a little fat."_

"_I am not, you're such a liar."_

"_So are you."_

"_You're still a jerk."_

"_But you love me anyway."_

"_Yeah, right."_

"_You're insane, don't you get it? You'll always find more people to blame because no matter how many people you kill, the pain never stops. You think that's because you haven't finished, but it's because there is no quick fix for what you've suffered. Even if you set fire to the entire world, that pain will never go away. But we care about you in the village, we can help you!"_

"_I don't need your help! I told you I'm never coming back, I don't know why you keep asking."_

"_Because I…I want you to come back. I need you to come back Sasuke, don't you get that by now?"_

"_If you've been harboring this hope all this time that I'll come back, that all this running around and hiding was only temporary, you're in for a big shock."_

He woke up with a start after only a couple of hours of intense dreaming, and now he sat up in bed, breathing hard and wondering if he was going nuts. He'd thought he'd started to get over his addiction to Sasuke, but apparently his denial of its existence didn't make it a reality. Seeing Sasuke again had made him remember everything he'd tried so hard to forget and left him wondering just why he'd been trying so hard in the first place.

Sure it was an unhealthy dependent relationship, but there had been moments when he'd felt a real bond starting to form again and his dreams seemed to be trying to remind him of that.

The fact was that he'd never felt closer to anyone before because no one else had seen every aspect of his being and still seemed to want to see more. Okay, so most of the time Sasuke acted with an air of general disinterest when it came to everything of a personal sort of nature, but the things he had said, shared, and noticed in Naruto had made Naruto realize that Sasuke paid more attention, and had more interest in him than he would have ever previously realized.

Sasuke listened to his voice so attentively that he always knew when Naruto was lying.

Sasuke could read his emotions just by looking at his eyes, and was fascinated by the openness he saw there.

Sasuke saw him at his best and worst in every type of situation imaginable and yet he always came back for more.

He even came back to the village. Never in a million years would Naruto have imagined that would ever happen. It had been a childish hope that had died many years ago. In the face of Sasuke's anger and hate against the village all hope for a happy ending to their situation seemed against the odds because it just wasn't in Sasuke to express anything other than that anger. At least, that was what Naruto had assumed at the time, based off what he'd worked out from Sasuke's general behavior. It had taken a long time to figure Sasuke out, but Naruto had thought he had. Obviously, there was still more to learn. With that in mind, he decided it was past time for him to learn more.

He knew there was no sleep to be had after the earlier couple of hours of dream filled sleep he'd already had, so he made himself comfortable sitting on his bed with his back up against the wall with Sasuke's black bag. He upended the envelopes onto the bed and started sorting them into some kind of date order. He didn't really know why it was important the he read them in order, he just felt that it was.

There turned out to be about thirty letters in total, the oldest ones were dated about three years old, and the newest was written yesterday. Naruto picked up the oldest one and started reading.

He was surprised to find out that these letters were all personal, all written to him. Of course they all had his name on them so he could be pretty sure they had something to do with him, but there were a lot of envelopes here, and for all Naruto knew, it could have been anything, including Intel on the nine tails collected for the Akatsuki. He never would have imagined Sasuke would write so many long letters to him over the years, like a three year long one sided conversation.

From the first letter, he learned that Sasuke knew he was throwing away the letters without reading them, and yet he not only kept writing them, he expanded their length beyond the three sentences typical of the ones sent in the past. He'd just never sent them knowing that Naruto would never read them anyway. Naruto got the strong impression that it was that exact reason why Sasuke had continued to write these sorts of things down. No one was likely to read them, so he could write about whatever he wanted. For a person with such closely guarded feelings normally it must have been one hell of a way for him to vent.

It was a little bizarre for a person like Sasuke to do something like this though even after being deprived of the one person he ever really shared anything with. Of course from Naruto's perspective, Sasuke hadn't really ever shared all that much, and what he had, had come out very reluctantly most of the time. But no one had made him write these, Naruto had not been there forcing some kind of emotion from him, he'd just gone ahead and done it of his own accord.

The letters were written to him, but written for Sasuke, that much was clear. He'd needed to talk, to have his say, even if no one listened. However, the letters didn't really contain much about anything in particular. It was mainly Sasuke mocking the general stupidity of everyone in the world, but the letters read almost exactly how Sasuke spoke, and Naruto could imagine Sasuke was here in his room telling him these things in person, rather than reading it from a page. That is, if he could ever imagine Sasuke talking about anything for so long. Occasionally Naruto would come across a section when Sasuke started writing on a more personal level, and he could see in the brush strokes how difficult it had been for him to write it. In his imagination of Sasuke speaking the words out loud to him, this is where Sasuke spoke reluctantly and with effort. At other times his writing was strong and bold, usually when he was writing about something he was angry about, and Naruto imagined he was frowning and using that tone of voice where he practically spat words as though even speaking about it made him livid. Other times he wrote casually rather than his usual careful style and Naruto could imagine that arrogant half smile on his face as he made a mocking remark about something or someone.

By the time Naruto finished the second to last letter, he almost felt like they hadn't really been away from each other at all. Sasuke had shared three years worth of idle thoughts, personal feelings, and frustrations with him and it made him remember that closeness they had only just begun to share with each other. But Naruto was really interested in the last letter, the one Sasuke had written before appearing at the village gates.

_I'm sitting in one of the tall trees just off the path to Konoha and I can see the village gates through the leaves. I occasionally look at that stupid dagger you gave me and wonder if I'm doing the right thing. Maybe I'm the dobe for once. _

_This isn't a good idea. I already know what will happen. I will give myself up, they will arrest me, and I will die. I know this will happen, and yet I still know it's what I'm going to end up doing._

_ You've poisoned my soul with your optimism and your unshakable belief that everything will be all right again if I just come back. I will be able to see you again every day, every night and nothing bad will happen. You were so adamant that this was the way things should be, that you've gotten me thinking it too._

_But that's impossible; it's idiotic because like I said I already know what will happen. Surrender, taken, death. Nothing will be all right, I will not get to see you every day for years to come, I know this. But just perhaps in between all of that I will get to see you at least one more time, see those eyes speaking to me, and telling me everything you're feeling, and I will kiss you and for a moment of stupid shared optimism, I will believe that it will last forever. And then I will be able to die with my biggest regret forgotten._

_ That is of course unless you still hate me, then I'll be dying for nothing, just like the rest of my clan did. It'll be poetic in a way that another Uchiha will die in Konoha for a stupid belief and hopeless trust. But whatever, at least when I die I can finally stop thinking of you, of revenge and whatever else that keeps tormenting me all the time. Maybe this is all just an elaborate way for me to commit suicide, but I can't really believe that. There are easier and less painful ways of getting myself killed than coming back here._

_ I suppose that even if you do hate me, and even if this is some sick way of ending it all, at least I will get something I want in the end._

_ I will see you._

_ And maybe I will get that kiss, even if you do hate me. Because I know, even if you don't, how you really feel. You can't lie to me Naruto, remember?_

This was the shortest letter of the bunch, and by far the most morbid. Not even in the early letters when Sasuke occasionally ranted at him for being a stupid dobe who was ignoring him did Naruto get such a strong impression of anguish and hurt. At least he could now see what Sasuke had meant about the letters giving him understanding.

He felt connected again, he felt a renewed bond, and most of all he started to feel that long forgotten hope start to rise again. He just didn't know what he was going to do about it. All he did know was that nothing had really changed between them, including the fact that he was still addicted to his obsession, and there was no way in hell he was going to let Sasuke die for the sake of getting one little kiss.

No matter how good a kiss it was.

* * *

><p>"Ah, Naruto. I'd thought I'd be seeing you soon," Tsunade greeted him when he entered her office later in the morning.<p>

He wasn't sure whether to take that as a good sign or not.

"I suppose I don't need to explain why I'm here then," Naruto began with a forced half smile.

Tsunade returned the smile for a brief second, but it hadn't lasted long. Naruto decided to take it as a bad sign after all.

"You can't ask me to set him free," she began. "You of all people know what he's done."

"Yeah I know, but people can change can't they?"

"You can't plead temporary insanity for a charge of treason," she told him dryly. "He has a lot to answer for."

"Are you going to kill him?"

Tsunade sighed. "If he were anyone else, yes, that's what the penalty is for treason, and it is costing me greatly by even contemplating making an exception here. The only reason he's even still alive is because I know what it would do to you and Sakura if we killed him outright. But I can't think of what to do. I did think that if he offered some intelligence, something we could use, we could allow him leniency, but so far he's been uncooperative to say the least."

"Information? I might be able to talk him around. But what then, you said you might be able to spare his life if he gave you some information, but what happens after that?"

"Prison," Tsunade replied simply. "Don't give me that look Naruto, life imprisonment is the very least our allies will accept for his past transgressions."

"What if you can make him useful?"

"We couldn't trust him again on his own, even you must know this."

Naruto chewed that thought over for a moment. "What if he wasn't on his own?"

"What do you mean?"

"What if we imprison him in the village. Make me his jailer, I'll watch him day and night to make sure he doesn't cause any trouble. That way you can use his experience and information and he won't be able to escape."

"That's ludicrous, Naruto. How can you assure me that he won't escape you? How can you trust him? I don't. From what I can see, he's given you very little reason to trust him in the past."

Well, not that Tsunade knew of anyway, and he wasn't about to enlighten her.

"You don't know him like I do," Naruto replied honestly. "I trust him, so all you have to do is trust me."

"Don't make it sound so simple."

Naruto shrugged. "Can't hurt to try. If it turns out I'm wrong and he can't be trusted…" Naruto swallowed, "You have my word, I'll kill him myself."

He left Tsunade's office with a promise that she would think about it. But Naruto had already decided that if Tsunade didn't go for it, Naruto would break Sasuke out, and leave the village with him. It hurt to think about it coming to that, and no matter what he would never do anything else to harm the leaf village, but he couldn't let Sasuke die because of him.

* * *

><p>Later the next day Naruto got word from Kakashi that his team had been stood down for the next couple of days. It was no wonder, sending a team out into the field that was so obviously preoccupied, was probably a very bad idea. Not even Naruto could argue with that one. Kakashi had also asked about the letters, but Naruto had told him that he hadn't gotten through them yet and it looked like there was no real information in them anyway. Surprisingly, Kakashi hadn't asked what they were about and for that Naruto was pretty thankful. He hadn't yet worked out how to explain the contents of the letters just yet.<p>

Sakura and Sai showed up on his doorstep later in the morning and when he opened the door it was to find Sakura frowning and Sai, well, Sai looked pretty much the same as always.

"You look terrible," Sakura greeted him.

Well at least she hadn't opened with something about Sasuke. Naruto knew how he must look, he hadn't slept much at all the night before and it had been a pretty emotional night. He was used to going without sleep, but he'd never felt quite so weary before.

"You sure know how to make a guy feel special Sakura-chan," Naruto replied rubbing his eyes.

"C'mon we're going to see Tsunade."

Naruto already knew why. "Uh, Sakura, I don't think it's such a good idea to see Sasuke right now."

"That's not why I'm going. I think we can talk Lady Tsunade out of killing him." Obviously Sakura realized what was probably going to happen to Sasuke for his crimes.

Naruto immediately perked up at the news. "What, how?"

"I'll explain everything when we go see her."

So for the second time that morning, Naruto entered the Hokage office to plead for Sasuke's life. Tsunade looked less than pleased to see him again so soon.

"Naruto, we've been over this."

"I wanted to see you Tsunade-sama," Sakura spoke up. "I know of a way we can make sure our allies are satisfied by punishing Sasuke without imprisoning him or killing him."

Tsunade sat back in her chair and frowned at Sakura. "And just what is this miracle punishment? Personally I can't think of anything…" Tsunade seemed to have a moment of understanding then, but she looked even less pleased than before. "No. There are too many issues with what you are suggesting. There is a reason we have forbidden such a thing."

Naruto felt like he'd just missed out on a large chunk of explanation here and wasn't happy feeling left out.

"What was forbidden, Sakura, what are you talking about?"

"I see you didn't explain things to your team mates before you came here and I can't blame you. It was deemed inhumane, worse than death for some. And besides, it's totally untested, he may die anyway and very painfully. You haven't thought this through properly."

"We could at least give him the option," Sakura countered.

"What option, what the hell are you two talking about!"

The Hokage turned her weary look to him. "Sakura is talking about a procedure to impede or completely cease Sasuke's ability to control chakra flow. It would mean he would no longer be able to utilize any ninjutsu or genjutsu with any degree of control in the future. Basically she is suggesting we neutralize his powers and abilities. It was a technique that had started to be developed a long time ago that was forbidden before it became common practice. It was considered too callous because it is a very painful medical procedure that is irreversible, and made some subjects suicidal after their abilities had been taken away so suddenly."

"It can't be more cruel than putting someone to death," Sakura argued. "We could at least give him the choice."

"Some ninja would disagree. Losing your way, your honor, for some is worse than death."

They argued for a little while longer but Naruto had since stopped listening. He was too busy arguing with himself over the pros and cons of such a plan. Of course if they went ahead with it, it might mean a sort of freedom for Sasuke. They may still either ban him from leaving the village or exile him altogether, but at least he wouldn't be in prison and he wouldn't be dead. Definite pros.

On the flipside, according the Tsunade the procedure was far from safe. It would cause him great pain and he may die from it anyway. Definite cons. Of course there was that niggling little fact that Sasuke would never agree to it anyway. If asked, Naruto knew, Sasuke would probably choose death over dishonor and losing his hard won and worked for skills. He went so far to gain such power, the thought of giving it all up would probably be unthinkable to him.

It was hearing Sai's voice that snapped him back into the conversation.

"Will he die or be imprisoned for his crimes?"

"That hasn't been decided," Tsunade snapped. But Naruto detected something in her voice that while he figured she wasn't lying, made him believe that she already knew what the decision would be.

"But what do you think will happen?"

Tsunade didn't look like she would answer for a moment. But eventually she just sighed and replied, "If he volunteers some information we can use, he will probably be imprisoned for life in a prison built to contain powerful renegades like him. If he refuses to comply and we have to pry the information out of him ourselves he will be interrogated for a few more days and executed."

"Do you believe our allies would be mollified if we went ahead with Sakura's plan?"

"Like I said before, some ninja consider it a far worse than death. It is a very severe punishment even if it does grant him a freedom of sorts. I believe most would be satisfied."

"Then we should give him the choice," Naruto spoke up. "Even if you think he doesn't deserve to have it, I want him to be able to decide."

"Fine, Naruto you give him his options. Make him fully understand the consequences of what each options entails. Sakura I want you to stay here, I don't want you to try and influence his decision by advocating a procedure like this one."

Sakura didn't look happy, but she stayed behind when Naruto left the room.

* * *

><p>When Naruto arrived in front of Sasuke's cell, he looked a little better and more alert than he had last night. He'd had a little time to recover from the first round of interrogation and looked like he might have managed some sleep too.<p>

Though he stayed sitting against the opposite wall, he looked slightly relieved when he saw Naruto step up to the bars.

"I didn't know if I would see you today," Sasuke admitted.

"You said you'd see me everyday," Naruto pointed out.

"That was yesterday, this is today. A lot can happen in a day, especially if you've had a lot to…understand."

Sasuke's not so subtle reference to the letters was not lost on Naruto and he resisted the urge to make Sasuke believe he hadn't read them yet.

"Yeah, I know what you mean. You called me a lot of names in some of those older letters, it'd be easy to hate you."

Instead of looking apologetic though, Sasuke gave him a half smile. "But you don't."

Naruto shrugged. "Maybe I've gotten used to it."

"Don't act so hurt. You know you probably call me a jerk as often as you use my actual name."

"You _are_ a jerk."

"Thank you for proving my point."  
>Naruto refused to let himself be baited into an insult-hurling match. "Look, Sasuke-"<p>

"They've decided haven't they?" Sasuke interrupted peering up a Naruto's face as though he could read the answer from his expression. "It can't be that bad. Or I suppose it could be and you're just not as upset as I imagined you'd be."

"Actually I'm not sure if it's good or bad. But the decision is going to end up being yours."

Sasuke didn't seem to like the sound of that. Whatever the options were he had probably assumed they weren't going to be good.

"Tell me."

Yes…TBC…sorry

* * *

><p><em>Notes: Yeah, I know this was meant to be the last chapter, but I got a little too involved and it was starting to get too long so I cut it off there and we will rejoin Sasuke and Naruto in the dungeons at the beginning of Chapter 6. Well hope everyone is more happy than annoyed there is going to be another chapter <em>

_ Thanks everyone that reviewed the last chapter it may be the most reviews I've even gotten for a chapter before so please know that I love you all. And Divine Velvet I will try my hardest not to die before the last chapter comes out you have my promise. Fox Girl, I tried to PM you but I think it didn't work out when I got not response. So if you do get to read the chapter please know that I tried and failed to get in contact and something must have gone wrong along the way._

_ Also there is a sort of Discussion List I have opened recently and if anyone is interested in joining please visit my profile page and click on the website link to join. There will be prizes though they may turn out to be arguably crap ones considering they have no real value other than pure entertainment. Interested yet?_

_Please keep reviewing, it clears writers block I swear it!_

_Dash._


	6. Chapter 6

**I'd Love You To Love To**

**Chapter 6**

Sasuke was looking at the floor and shaking his head by the time Naruto had finished speaking. He'd outlined the options, death, imprisonment, and neutralization and Sasuke wasn't pleased with any of them.

Death he had expected.

Imprisonment had been at the back of his mind.

But neutralizing his talents? That had been an option he'd never thought existed and was pretty horrified at the idea. Everything he'd worked for, everything he'd gained, would all be for nothing. He'd rather be dead than some disgraced nothing.

"It's worse than death," Sasuke told him.

"That's the popular thought," Naruto replied tiredly. "Look, it wouldn't be that bad. You're still an amazing fighter and they're not talking about gouging your eyes out so you'll still have that."

"Most of my Sharingan techniques need a certain amount of chakra control. My eyes will be close to useless," Sasuke replied dismissively.

"Well like I said, you're still a fighter, even without chakra. I think the idea is just to take down the threat level a little. Make you a less lethal."

"You don't understand what I have sacrificed to get where I am," Sasuke told him, getting to his feet.

"I understand enough, I know how hard it would be to give up."

Sasuke watched him for a little while before saying. "You want me to do this."

"Not really. But I don't want you to die either," Naruto said softly. "And you have to see that imprisonment would be just as bad. You'd be as good as neutralized, but locked up with a bunch of criminals and no contact with the outside world."

"Are you regretting your plea for me to come back yet?"

"Back then I didn't think it would be this complicated," Naruto admitted. "But staying with you and seeing you try to destroy yourself and the village would have been harder. You can't tell me that I put you into this mess and make it all my fault. I tried to get you to come back before they branded you a traitor, you did the things that made them want to kill you all by yourself. You said you gave up your mission to come back, but I think you just got a little lost and wanted something familiar again. You knew what would happen if you came back, you can't blame me when it turns out you were right."

Sasuke came up to the bars and looked directly in Naruto's eyes.

"You're right, I knew this would happen. I resigned myself to possible death. And what if I _do_ choose death, will you be as prepared for my fate as I am?"

"No, I said I didn't want you to die!"

"You asked for this, you can't have everything you want in this world without risking the consequences. I know I chose this, but you can't say you didn't have a hand in getting me back here even knowing the things that I have done. So I asked you, what will you do if I choose death?"

Naruto avoided answering Sasuke just yet and asked his next question carefully. "Did you really come back here for me?"

"I didn't come back for the welcoming hospitality, that's for certain."

Naruto nodded, he had the answer he'd wanted. "I won't let you die for me Sasuke."

"And what's that supposed to mean?"

"I've gotten pretty strong. The whole village couldn't stop Pain, but I did."

"You're talking about freeing me yourself," Sasuke said with some surprise. "You'd become an outcast and your precious village would hate you if you helped me escape."

"I told you, I won't let you die for me, whatever the cost."

"Then why give me the options then? You must know that I would choose freedom and you over this village any day."

"Because you'll be choosing for the both of us. Our future will be set depending on your choice and I hope that's a harder decision for you than just choosing whatever is best for you and you alone. Even if that does turn out to be the best option," he added as an afterthought.

Sasuke didn't respond at first, just kept looking at him and thinking.

"I think you know me better than that. You would be happy, village or not, eventually," he said as though speaking the words would make it true.

"We'll be together at least. I have to go."

"You'll be back tomorrow?"

"Everyday, remember?"

Sasuke watched Naruto leave and then listened until he couldn't hear his footsteps anymore.

He would never have suspected Naruto would offer him something like this. He would never have thought Naruto would choose him over the village, but apparently that's what had just happened. It made things seem better about what he was doing in a way and not just because he might not die now. Sasuke had given up his plans, his mission and his revenge to come back here. Those plans had been everything to Sasuke. And Sasuke knew that to Naruto this village, his friends and his will to protect it all, was what mattered most to him, and here he was willing to throw it all away to save one person. He guessed they were even now. And he didn't doubt Naruto's resolve because he never said anything without the full intention of carrying it out.

But then what? They would have each other and little else, but that was fine for Sasuke, who felt he had so little to begin with. But what about Naruto? Sure he would leave the village and he _would_ be happy enough for a time. Sasuke even got the impression that Naruto thought this was the best option. But the weight of what he'd done, and what he'd left behind would torture him. Sasuke would have him back, but it wouldn't be a contented life and Naruto may well grow to resent him for putting him in that position. Not consciously, but it would be there all the same.

So the real question was whether Sasuke could be content knowing the pain he'd caused just because it was the better of the three options for him, or would he have to give up even more?

He thought the problem over from every imaginable angle for the rest of the day. They hadn't come in to start the interrogation as he expected they might so he had little else to do but think about his situation. Either way he looked at it, it was pretty bleak and at least one person would be made unhappy by the result. So it really just came down to the question of who he'd prefer to do that to.

Sasuke was not, generally speaking, a self sacrificing sort of person and he kept coming back to the option that best suited him and tossing it around his head seeing how it might be made better for the other person too. But no matter what he did, no matter what he thought of, he just couldn't make it right in his head, and he kept coming back to the original question.

At least he'd dismissed one option. Naruto had been right; life in prison was actually the worst option of the three. He would be good as neutralized without the bonus of being able to see the one person he was doing this all for. So that was out.

But then there was another option to replace it with. Naruto had told him that if Sasuke chose to die rather than have his chakra blocked, Naruto would rescue him, and he wouldn't die. But then Naruto would only know to rescue him if he was told it was going to happen. He didn't know the current Hokage all that well, having left the village not too long after she took up office, but he assumed that if he warned her to keep his execution a secret, she'd do just that. It would be better for her to kill him in secret and apologize for it afterwards than risk Naruto doing something stupid and possibly losing him too.

Sasuke might have been prepared for death when he came here, but that didn't exactly mean he wanted to die either. But the more he thought about it, the more he thought the idea had merit. He would be gone and life would go on without him. Eventually Naruto would get over it and would be free to stay in the village and pursue his goal to become Hokage and Sasuke wouldn't have to live with the idea that he'd forced Naruto to become an outcast just because he'd made a lot of bad decisions.

Whatever he was going to do, he was at least decided that it was going to be a decision made without involving Naruto. It was the only way Sasuke could make any kind of a choice without having his thoughts and emotions swayed in a way he didn't want them to go. And Naruto would never plead a case about what was best for him anyway, he'd only really care about what was best for Sasuke. He just didn't have it in him to think about himself before others, and Naruto telling him exactly what he wanted to hear wasn't going to help him decide what was actually right in the end.

So with at least two things decided, he went back to his problem until he reached his decision. He didn't like it much, but it was the best thing for everyone involved.

He got up and went to the bars. He could see the guard just up the hall under the glow of the light.

"Guard! I want to speak to the Hokage. Now."

* * *

><p>Naruto had another dreamed filled sleep last night and woke feeling groggy and a little spacey. He'd dreamt of leaving the village with Sasuke, being with him again, going wherever they wanted, doing whatever they wanted, safe together at last. But he'd been woken from his dream when ninja from every nation showed up and killed them both. He remembered watching Sasuke die in his dream, his face covered in blood and a pain filled expression.<p>

He took his time having breakfast and getting ready for the day ahead, planning on going and seeing Sasuke first thing and finding out if he'd thought much more about their conversation yesterday.

He was just on his way out the door when he ran into Kakashi on his doorstep, hand raised about to knock.

"What's up Kakashi sensei? If it's about those letters again…"

Kakashi just shook his head. "We've been summoned." Kakashi paused. "Sasuke's sentence was carried out last night."

"What?" Naruto exclaimed his heart almost stopping with the sudden news. "Why weren't we told? What happened?"

"You now know as much as I do. We have to go and meet with the Hokage."

* * *

><p>It seemed like the longest time before they showed up in the Hokage's office and when they did come in, it was to find Sakura already there and looking at the floor by her feet with a solemn expression. Tsunade had the same expression but she was looking at them both directly at least.<p>

Naruto had the strangest feeling creep over him. It was cold and left behind him a feeling of emptiness. He felt like he'd known what had happened and could see it just like it had been in his dream. Sasuke was dead and Naruto hadn't saved him. He felt hollow and dead himself and he couldn't look at Tsunade's face because he didn't want to act out. Bad things happened when he got angry and upset, and already he could feel the fox chakra wake up inside him. He felt so angry, Tsunade hadn't told him what was going to happen before it had happened and Sasuke had died alone for nothing and it was all his fault.

Naruto was so busy being wrapped up in his own emotions that he wasn't really listening to what was being said. Not until he heard…

"…decided to do the procedure last night. As far as I can tell it was successful and he has been permanently neutralized from properly using his chakra from now on."

Naruto's head snapped up in surprise. "What?"

Tsunade frowned, obviously annoyed that Naruto had not been paying attention earlier. "He chose to undergo the procedure. The other villages think it was a suitable enough sentence for him to live out his days like a prisoner without actually being one, and they are for the most part happy with the outcome. Not all of them are happy of course, but it's nothing I can't deal with."

"I was under the impression we would be kept in the loop here," Kakashi pointed out. Apparently, he was a little disturbed about how this had been carried out too. It had happened so suddenly during the night. It was a little strange to say the least.

"The prisoner had conditions he wanted met before he would agree to anything. One of his conditions was that no one be told what was happening until after it was done. And the other was that if we weren't prepared to do the procedure immediately, he wanted to be executed on the spot. We had no alternative but to go ahead. He was lucky to not have died during the procedure as it was considering we didn't have much of an opportunity to prepare anything and although he agreed to it, his body was fighting against it unconsciously and it caused some problems."

"But it was a success," Sakura pointed out. "We eventually got through it."

She didn't look as happy with that idea as she did yesterday though. She was probably just now realizing that Sasuke was only choosing to do it over death by a very small margin considering his conditions.

So Sasuke wasn't dead, but had chosen to do this to himself instead. When he'd told Sasuke about his options he hadn't really believed Sasuke would want this. He'd given so much of himself to gain his abilities, there was no way he'd want to throw them away now. He had thought Sasuke would go along with being rescued and they would be together, whole and free. He was relieved he wasn't dead, but was angry at Sasuke for not wanting Naruto to know what he'd chosen and for doing this when there were better options available to him.

"Where is he?"

"He is resting right now and will be for another day at least. I have decided to take your advice Naruto and release him into your custody for the time being. I would have preferred Kakashi watch him, but it is easier to rearrange the missions to suit your new responsibilities than do so for a jonin we might need to send out on an assignment last minute. Your team will remain stood down until we can assign an Anbu team to watch him while you are on missions. _You_ may trust him Naruto, but he is still a trained fighter even without full control of his chakra, and he will need to be watched for a while yet before I share even close to that feeling of trust. Does this arrangement suit you?"

Naruto nodded. "Sure."

* * *

><p>He wasn't allowed to see Sasuke until he was recovered enough to be moved out of his holding room, and Naruto got the message two days later to come collect Sasuke and take him home that night.<p>

Sasuke looked terrible when Naruto went to get him. He still wasn't completely recovered from his interrogation earlier in the week, and he looked rightly drained from whatever it took to neutralize him altogether.

He didn't talk as Naruto led him from the holding area and up into the night air. Despite having three guards around him plus Naruto, he seemed relieved when he came outside and took a deep breath of fresh free air. The moon was near full tonight, and Naruto watched the bright silver light touch that pale smooth skin that he'd begun to think he'd never see again without a set of bars between them.

"C'mon," Naruto urged after a moment. They weren't alone right now and he couldn't stand here and admire Sasuke's appearance forever.

Sasuke followed him through the night and up the stairs to his apartment. The guards didn't follow them inside, but would stay outside through the night, every night and day, for the next few months just to make sure Sasuke didn't do anything detrimental to the village.

But they were alone once Naruto closed the door behind him, and he lurked back by the door, unsure of what to do with himself now that they were once again alone in a room together without bars between them. He had never felt this way around Sasuke, especially not when they had been…intimate friends.

Sasuke was standing just inside the main room with his back to Naruto, surveying his surroundings as though he'd never been here before. He had, but not for many years.

"I guess you never grew out of being a slob," Sasuke said eventually.

Trust Sasuke to open up with an insult.

"I know you never grew out of being a jerk," Naruto shot back stepping past him and going into the kitchen.

When he came back out he was carrying a cloth and a bowl of water.

"Take off your shirt and sit on the couch."

Sasuke raised an eyebrow at the command, but did as he was told. Just as Naruto suspected, he had quite a few shallow cuts and abrasions from his interrogation that hadn't been healed. No doubt Sakura would be over first thing in the morning so she could look Sasuke over then, but for now he set about cleaning out the small wounds with the cloth and water.

Sasuke was watching his face closely apparently trying to read into his emotions while he worked. He didn't seem to be having much luck.

"You've changed," Sasuke commented after a while.

"It's been years," Naruto said dismissively. "You think I would stay the same forever?"

"Yes," Sasuke replied as though he hoped this would have been the case. "You still don't seem entirely happy to see me."

Naruto sighed and stopped tending to Sasuke's cuts for the moment. He put the bowl down and looked Sasuke in the eye for the first time since seeing him in the prison and giving him the options that would affect the rest of his life.

"You didn't talk to me about what you were going to do. You didn't have to give it all up."

"Yeah sure and we could have run off together and lived happily ever after huh?" Sasuke asked sarcastically.

"Well, why not?"

"Because you wouldn't have been happy, and you would have blamed me, and I would've had to listen to you bitch and moan about it all the time. And that's even if you decided to stay with me. Carrying that much baggage, you might have left me eventually and then you'd have nothing to return to either because the village would think you were a traitor for saving me."

"So you, like always, just did what you think is best and went through with it without another thought. But now it's just the opposite; you're going to hate me because you lost your abilities."

"I'd rather make you listen to me complain than the other way around. At least this way, you don't have to go against the village. It's not ideal, but it's better this way."

"And what if they hadn't been prepared to go through with it when you demanded and they did kill you? What the fuck was that all about?"

Sasuke shrugged. "I said I was prepared. I just wanted it over either way. You would have gotten over it, and you could have gotten on with your life."

"I would've hated you for not letting me help you. And I don't know if I would have gotten over it."

"You're obviously already angry that I didn't let you help. There was no totally happy way this could have played out and you know that."

Naruto didn't reply. Sasuke was right, but he didn't want to admit it.

"I still don't understand what all this means," Naruto told him honestly. "I can't believe that you came back just because I didn't reply to your letters."

"You still don't trust me?"

"I want to, I really do. But you never had any strong feelings for me, you said what we did was fun and that was it. And while I realize your life is probably lacking in fun, it's not a good enough reason for you to give up, come back and have them do this to you."

"It was fun. But I never said it was just that."

"Okay, but you said it was supposed to be."

"What is supposed to be and what really is can be very different things. You once told me you wanted me. You told me you needed me. You almost told me you loved me."

Naruto stopped what he was doing and looked at Sasuke in surprise.

"Yeah, but you wanted me to lie to you, remember?"

Sasuke gave him that half smile. As much as Naruto hated that smile, he was glad to see it again.

"I can always tell when you are lying. You weren't lying to me then."

Okay, that was a surprise. So surprising that Naruto couldn't accept that.

"No I wasn't."

"You're lying now."

"No, I'm not!"

"Believe want you want, but the idea pleased me that you might. You don't know what that did to me. No one who really knows me has ever loved me except for my family. I became obsessed by the thought, especially because I thought I'd ruined things that day on the mountain. You made me want to come back, because I need you to love me."

Naruto let that sink in for a while. He almost thought that this can't be Sasuke sitting here in front of him and it was some imposter, but he knew that it wasn't. Nobody in the world could fuck with his head like Sasuke could, nobody could surprise him like Sasuke did, and nobody drove him quite so insane as Sasuke did.

"This is a sex thing isn't it?" Naruto asked with skepticism.

Sasuke actually laughed a little at that, though it looked like it hurt to do so because of his bruised body.

"This is not a sex thing, dobe. If it were a sex thing, there are easier people in this world to bed than you. Most people don't tend to ask so many questions either. Why would I risk death and have my chakra pathways mutilated merely for sex? You're good Naruto, but nobody is that good. I don't want to fuck you Naruto."

Naruto blinked at that. "You don't?"

"No. If you think that's all I ever wanted from you, then I will take great pleasure in proving you wrong."

"You will?"

"You told me after that time in the temple that you wanted to give me a temptation to come back to the village. It worked, by the way, just not in the way you imagined. I didn't come back for your body."

"Oh."

"That's just what I call a perk."

"You never say stuff like this, you can't be my Sasuke." Naruto said attempting a bad joke to lighten the nervousness he felt.

Sasuke decided though to answer him seriously. "I can try to be."

For a moment he dropped whatever pretense he had of being angry and cold toward Sasuke. He was seriously confused and really wanted to know the answer to his next question.

"Why?"

Sasuke spent a few moments looking into his eyes before smiling. It wasn't that jerky little half smile, it wasn't even the smug looking grin he had. It was faint, but it was a real smile he saw there.

He touched the side of Naruto's face, those light fingertips tracing their way down to his jaw. "There's the old you. Those open eyes of yours, you haven't changed all that much after all."

"You still haven't answered my question," Naruto pointed out.

Sasuke let his hand fall back to his side. "I know. I don't…share much normally, you know that, and I'm not ready for that explanation just yet."

So much for trying to stay calm and not be angry. Naruto scowled, getting to his feet.

"All I do is give you space, let you make the moves, I'm sick of-"

Sasuke silenced him when he stood up too, grabbed Naruto's arm, and leant in close to whisper in his ear, "I love you dobe, don't make me say it again."

Naruto didn't move, frozen stiff both from Sasuke's proximity, the feel of his breath brushing the side of his neck, and the stunning news he'd just had whispered directly into his ear.

Sasuke hadn't moved either apparently not wanting to see the look on Naruto's face after the confession. His grip had tightened on his arm though as the seconds went by with no response from Naruto. Naruto didn't want to leave that hanging, but he couldn't for the life of him think of what to say back. Did Sasuke want him to say 'it' back, because Naruto wasn't positive he could. Sasuke had told him that he had been lying before when he said he didn't love Sasuke and although he didn't doubt Sasuke's ability to tell when he was lying, it had been news to him and he needed time to process the information. But still, he supposed there was a way to tell Sasuke what he might want to hear without actually having to say the words. And it seemed kind of fitting anyway,

"There's no way I love you, Teme."

The grip on his arm loosened a little and Sasuke leant back so Naruto could see his face.

_There_ was that smug little grin. "You're such a fucking liar."

Naruto smiled too, he couldn't help it. And then he leant in and kissed that grin he hated but missed so much.

The kiss went on for a while this time and wasn't as chaste as before in the cells. Four years of pent up emotions and physical need went into that kiss.

"Are you sure you don't want to have sex, or are you the one trying to prove a point now?"

"I'm not totally sold on the idea." Sasuke admitted a little flushed and out of breath. "You got us into this by trying to prove a point. It worked by the way."

They spent the night curled up together in Naruto's bed. They lay in bed for a long time that night, not really speaking, fingers twined together just like they used to do. Naruto fell asleep eventually, rolling onto his side away from Sasuke. He was briefly woken though when he felt Sasuke scoot up behind him to lay flush against his back, an arm around his waist, reconnecting after losing that lost brief touch of his fingers.

He wondered if Sasuke had done it in his sleep without realizing it. He'd never been a cuddler in the past.

Those thoughts were quite pleasantly dashed soon after.

"Dobe, stop moving or I _will_ tie you down."

Naruto smiled and fell back asleep, looking forward to tomorrow, and the day after and…forever.

* * *

><p>Sasuke woke up early the next morning while it was still dark. He lay for a moment and listened to the world around him. The village was pretty quiet at this time and all he could really hear was Naruto's persistent snore beside him. Most people might be disturbed by the sound, but Sasuke actually felt comforted by it. It suited him. A loud, persistent, nothing held back noise, that drowned out everyone around it without fail.<p>

Careful not to wake Naruto, he sat up in bed and looked down at his sleeping face, peaceful, content and happy. Sasuke wanted to reach over and touch his skin, smooth the hair back that had fallen over his face, but he didn't want to wake him. Instead he checked the room around him making sure he was hidden well enough from any of the windows.

When he was satisfied he wouldn't be seen and Naruto was still fast asleep, he gripped his right wrist in his left hand and stared at his hand as though willing it do to something. It took a little while but eventually Sasuke saw the flicker of a spark pass from one finger to the next.

It wasn't much but it was a start.

The End.

Well...sort of...

* * *

><p><em>Do I hear you all say 'finally' or 'noooooo!' I hope it's neither and you are satisfied with the ending. That last part isn't meant to be a cliffhanger I just wanted to give something back to Sasuke in the end to make it all seem a little better but who knows, there might be something left in there for the future. I also never intended to make it seem as though Sasuke had lied in any way to Naruto about his feelings either, there's no dark agenda here, just an interesting side note. <em>

_So it's been a long trip for those who started reading when I posted the first chapter of the first story and I am extremely curious to see if you are all happy with how things turned out. **Please review** and let me know, this is the last chapter of the first trilogy after all. And thank you all so much for reading the story and I hope you enjoyed it._

_There will be more to the series, it has been decided. There are two specials after this chapter if you want to press the 'next' option. Plus there is a new instalment to the series coming soon called Chasing Away the Past, so keep an eye open. There is a preview posted at the end of the two specials at the end of this fic. Enjoy!_

_Big cheers for PJ for being the beta for the last installment of this series, she did an awesome job making it readable and I'm very grateful for her help._

_Don't forget to join The Dashdom for future updates, general talk and previews. Just visit my profile page and click on the link for the website._

_Dash._


	7. WNL Yule Special

_AN: Hello everyone, bet you never thought I'd update this! But I wanted to do something for Christmas and according to my poll this is everyone's favourite Dash story so I thought I'd give it a go. It's also dedicated to _ugottalongway2go_ who wrote the 100__th__ review of my Remember Me story. My only spec from them was to have fluff so this is a little fluffier than my usual but hey, it's Christmas and I suppose it's the season for fluff rather than heavy angst so excuse the divergence from my usual just this once _

_For those of you who have read the entire series, think of this as a fun little side note I did up as a Christmas/Yule/Hanukkah/Quanza (or whatever you celebrate or don't at this time of year) present for you all. It has no major bearing on the story and I won't delve into complicated plot. Just think of it as a nice time of year with our boys not too long after Sasuke returned to the village. I'm not touching Sasuke's possibly-not-totally-gone abilities in this one because I haven't decided for certain whether I will forever leave this series alone yet and if not, that will be something I would prefer to leave for later. _

_ Something I should probably admit to because it will become painfully obvious soon enough…I'm not too clued up on what Christmas is like in Japan. I realise it isn't celebrated like it is in western culture because it's a religious holiday mostly and that December 24th Christmas Eve is something more like Valentine's Day, a night to spend with a special person and trade gifts. So with that in mind, I thought I'd write a little piece sort of centred on that tradition instead. I apologise profusely if I get it too wrong, because it's bound to happen and I took liberties by design because Naruto World isn't a real world kind of anime. It'll only be half loosely based on what I think I know and what I can make up (this is fantasy after all) so hopefully it won't suck too badly _

_- Dash._

**WNL Yule Special.**

"So what are your plans for Yule, Naruto?"

Naruto hadn't really been paying much attention to his teammate. He and Sakura had come out to the training ground to meet with Kakashi but had been waiting now for twenty minutes for their perpetually late team leader to arrive. So instead of waiting in the freezing wind for Kakashi to turn up they had taken shelter by a nearby tree and wrapped their cloaks around them in an effort to warm themselves up a bit.

They could have just started training without him, but Naruto was frankly sick of training. He was still officially off team missions till Tsunade was happy enough that Sasuke wouldn't try to destroy the village the moment the village hero had left him behind so basically all Naruto did these days was train and hang out with Sasuke. The last part of his village confinement wasn't too bad, but not being able to go on missions was starting to get to him a little. He felt a little stir crazy actually and it was a feeling that only lessened when he was hanging out with Sasuke. But Sasuke wasn't here now, and though he had to follow Naruto just about everywhere he went, he wasn't allowed near him when he was in the Hokage mansion and just generally didn't want to come out to watch when Naruto was training. He couldn't join in and the reminder of abilities lost was probably a bit too much for him. So whenever he stayed behind, three Anbu watched Sasuke like a hawk.

Which would have been fine if Sasuke didn't do everything possible to try and lose his unwanted Anbu tail whenever the opportunity presented itself. Sasuke might have had his chakra flow cut off, but he was still quick on his feet and knew how to lose people when he wanted to. It made Naruto worry and it made Tsunade furious. But it could have been worse. Sasuke was only doing this mild form of rebellion because he was bored without Naruto around. It wasn't like he did anything bad, sometimes Naruto suspected Sasuke only did it to see if he still could, sort of like a test of skill. And because Sasuke had been cut off from his true power because of him, Naruto found it hard to really berate him for the behaviour. Pity Sasuke realised this too.

"I don't really have any plans," Naruto responded after a moment. "What are you doing?"

"Oh not much," she replied shrugging. "I love decorating the house, that's always fun. Oh and I hope we get a cake this year. I was wondering though, do you think Sasuke might like to go out and do something on Yule Eve?"

It took all of Naruto's willpower not to wince. Neither of them had told anyone what was going on between them, it just didn't seem to be worth it. Too many hassles, too many questions and way too much gawking. But it made him uncomfortable whenever Sakura bought up things like this. She always wanted to include Sasuke in things or hinted more than occasionally about asking him to do something with her of a date-like nature and each time Naruto had tired to steer her in thinking that it was too soon and she should probably let him adjust more before pressing him about anything more.

He felt horrible about it of course. Sakura really seemed to love the guy and there was really no way Sasuke was ever going to return her feelings. He wasn't completely sure Sasuke even liked her much as a friend anymore. She was flirty when they were together just like the old days and the attention she paid him didn't help to endear her to him very much. In fact the only time Naruto had ever bought it up Sasuke had told him that he thought she'd never really grown up. When she was around him she was just the same old Sakura that used to pine away for him when they were twelve. It had vaguely annoyed him then, and it bugged him even more now. In the past before returning he'd been mean to her, tried to kill her and yet still she seemed infatuated. If only she'd talk to him like a regular person then at least they could be friends, but Sakura just didn't seem to get the message. He'd even suggested to Sasuke that she might change a bit if he had a talk with her, let her down easily, but he basically wasn't interested. He'd just told Naruto that if Naruto was that eager he'd happily tongue molest him in front of her to help her get the message and Naruto had hastily let the matter drop in mortified embarrassment at the mere thought.

"Uh, you want to ask him out on one of the most romantic nights of the year?"

Sakura frowned. "Still too soon?"

"Probably," Naruto replied honestly.

But it did give him an idea. Yule Eve _was_ a pretty romantic night and while he was still having trouble fitting 'Sasuke' and 'romantic' into the same sentence even now, it might be nice to get him a gift and maybe a cake for the occasion. If nothing else it might help show his appreciation of everything Sasuke had given up for him.

"What sort of Yule cake do you get?" Naruto asked curiously. He hadn't really had that tradition since it was more of a family thing so he was curious about what it was like.

"Oh it's beautiful!" Sakura lit up after her depression about not being able to ask Sasuke out. "Vanilla sponge with whipped cream and strawberries, it's so delicious."

Naruto nodded. Well at least it was somewhere to start.

Kakashi showed up a few moments later and they started their drills.

* * *

><p>On the walk home after training Naruto put a lot of thought into what sort of present he might get Sasuke. And after about half an hour of careful thought he got really depressed instead. The problem was that Sasuke didn't actually seem to like <em>anything<em>. Well except for him. And although Naruto had no qualms giving himself to Sasuke as a present it wasn't exactly a special thing when he got that most nights nowadays anyway. He supposed he could try to make it special, a little different than the norm, but the idea of doing anything like that made him go bright red immediately. He just imagined himself trussed up naked with bright red ribbon and didn't know whether to laugh at himself or die of embarrassment. And besides, Sasuke's idea of kink was a lot more varied than Naruto's could ever be so whatever he could come up with would probably be too tame in comparison anyway.

And besides, he wanted to get something for Sasuke to keep. The one and only present he'd even given to Sasuke had been a ornate dagger he'd bought on their little vacation together and sure he'd seemed to like it, but he couldn't give Sasuke any form of weaponry because he wasn't allowed to. Even now that dagger he'd given Sasuke was sitting locked up in the Hokage mansion along with his sword, neither of which he was likely to get back any time soon. The one consolation was that Naruto had bought two of the same dagger and kept one for himself that was practically identical. Occasionally Sasuke got it out and looked at it like he missed his own and that gave Naruto another thought: Sasuke had seemed to like the idea that they had the same thing, two identical pieces of memory that were only separated by space. At least that's how Sasuke had put it in an uncommon moment of sharing. So that gave Naruto an idea, maybe he could do the same thing now, buy two of the same thing, something that wasn't a sharp weapon, that Sasuke could have with him even during his confinement within the village. But that's where the idea fell flat. Weapons were the only thing Naruto could think of that Sasuke might like and it needed to be something small and easily hidden that he could keep with him always without giving the bizarre fact away that they had matching 'things' which was probably a little too romantic if they wanted to keep this whole relationship to themselves.

The whole way home, Naruto looked through various shop windows trying to get inspired but nothing really stood out for him by the time he was opening the door to his apartment. He looked around the main room and seeing no one around made him frown. Of course when he was training Sasuke could still leave the apartment tailed by Anbu, but it always made Naruto worry that he might get himself into trouble.

Deciding to have a shower to take his mind off it, he was just stepping into his bedroom to get undressed when he found his new housemate standing in the middle of the room holding up two shirts and looking between them like they'd offended him somehow.

Since coming back Sasuke hadn't had much in the way of clothes. The ones he'd shown up to the village in had been dirtied and ripped to the point where it was either burn them or use them for compost in Sakura's garden. So after ridding himself of the clothes, he'd had nothing to wear at all not having bought anything else with him. During the first few days back in the village they'd been practically secluded in the apartment where clothes were unneeded and really unwanted, but after that he'd had to find something to wear. And more than most of the time he'd been wearing Naruto's clothes. Not the orange, never that, because Sasuke said he'd rather wander the streets naked than wear that getup, but he did wear some of Naruto's plainer, relaxation or training clothes. They had been a bit big but they still more or less fit enough for decency but wearing nothing but loose pants and t-shirts all the time seemed to make him depressed. Naruto knew why, it was because they weren't really combat friendly badass ninja clothing. Sasuke was pretty touchy about not being a full ninja anymore and not being able to use ninjutsu or genjutsu and wearing casual clothes all the time seemed to be a constant reminder of that.

So Naruto decided to get him some new clothes. Now, Sasuke might be the closest person to him in the whole world, but he'd rather set his own hair on fire than take Sasuke out clothes shopping. They argued about everything even when talking about shopping for groceries so Naruto preferred to not give himself the ulcer. Going out shopping on his own was also out of the question because as Sasuke had not so subtly pointed out by carrying on about Naruto's orange and black outfit, Naruto had about as much fashion sense as a blind monkey. So desperately wanting Sasuke to feel better about himself, he'd enlisted Sakura's help. In retrospect it might not have been the wisest move. While Sakura might have had more of an idea of what was cool, she also seemed hung up on dressing him as she wanted to see him rather than what he might actually want to wear. Naruto had realised his mistake when he presented the clothes to Sasuke only to have Sasuke less than impressed with the selection. He hadn't hated it necessarily, but it was obvious it was more for looks than it was for comfort.

The pants had been black and okay really though a little more fitting than his last pair. The few shirts he'd gotten had been either revealing or tight or both and he hadn't really been happy about either of them. The only thing he'd salvaged from his original outfit where his sandals and his arm guards both of both of which he was wearing now while he stared daggers at the two shirts. When he noticed his audience though he dropped his arms to his sides apparently in relief.

"I was about to come looking for you," he said which also explained the reason he was dressing in something other than Naruto's stuff for a change and why he was wearing shoes in the house. "I'm glad I didn't have to go out in this stuff though."

Naruto leant on the doorway and grinned at him. "Forget the shirt, the outfit looks better without it anyway."

Sasuke gave him a less than amused look. "I'd be flattered if I didn't feel like you two were playing Sasuke dress up with me."

"They were Sakura's choices, I more into playing Sasuke dress down. You know I kinda like that dark red one. It matches the crazy in your eyes."

"Funny dobe," Sasuke muttered tossing the shirts onto the bed and sitting on them with obvious disregard for them before bending down to take off his shoes.

"Were you really going to go out into the village looking for me?" Naruto asked after a moment.

"Yes," Sasuke replied without looking at him.

Which was frankly pretty brave of him. There weren't a lot of people around that didn't know who he was or what he'd done. It was entirely possible that the only thing that had saved him so far was that those people who might want to hurt him also knew he was Naruto's best friend. And being the best friend of the village hero counted for a lot these days. But still, going out without Naruto's company was tempting fate when you couldn't fight back to the best of your ability.

"Are you _that_ bored?" Naruto asked before being able to stop himself. As soon as he'd said it, he'd actually winced.

Surprisingly though Sasuke didn't seem to take much offence. He just finished with his shoes, sat up and shrugged. "Sometimes. You train a lot."

"You only get bored when I'm not here?"

"Mostly."

"But even when I am here half the time you're reading and I'm watching TV. Sometimes we don't talk for hours so how could it make a difference?"

"It just does."

Naruto blinked in surprise. "Wow Sasuke," he said honestly. "That was almost… nice."

"You think I can't say nice things?" Sasuke asked with a smirk.

"Not generally. I mean I know you're capable of it, but it's usually buried under so many layers of jerk that I can't see it for what it really is."

Sasuke didn't reply, he just kept his smirk and patted the bed between his legs for Naruto to sit down. Naruto did so but climbed on him rather than sit next to him. Doubtless it had been what Sasuke really wanted anyway. Sasuke ran his hands gently up Naruto's clothed back before grabbed him and swiftly toppling him off his lap and onto the bed where Sasuke leaned over him and grinned down at him.

"You want nice?" Sasuke asked somewhat inappropriately darkly.

"Actually I want shower. I must smell like a rank dog right now."

"Nonsense, I can barely smell Sakura on you at all."

Naruto winced, his slightly aroused moment leaving him in about a second. "See, you can't do nice."

Sasuke sighed. "I can do nice, to you."

"But no one else?"

"I don't think you would want me to be _that_ kind of 'nice' to other people."

"I just meant in general. C'mon lots of people here missed you and tried to help you."

"I didn't come back here for them. We had this discussion before, nobody really knows me except you. How could they know me enough to really care?"

"I'm not the only one who cares about you."

"Yet you're the only one I seem to be interested in knowing about. Go figure."

"Gah, teme! You're going to make me insane."

"Going to?"

"You are such and asshole."

"It's a knack."

Sasuke was just leaning down to kiss him when there was a knock at his door.

"Don't answer it," Sasuke told him.

Naruto lifted an eyebrow at that. "I'm rooming with a psychopathic ex-rogue ninja and you want me to make people believe I'm unable to answer the door?"

Sasuke frowned. "Fine, have your shower, I will answer the door. Do not get dressed."

Naruto couldn't really see the harm in that. The only people that were likely to come to his place weren't people that would hurt Sasuke. Probably.

"Okay, it's probably Kakashi anyway. He said something about coming around to check up on us anyway."

_And to check and see if my chakra was still subdued, _Sasuke thought to himself as he got off the bed and started toward the front door. He heard the shower start up just as he pulled the door open and about half a second after that he really wished he'd thought to put a shirt on.

Sakura spent a good few moments looking at him dressed in nothing but his pants and arm guards before blushing really red and stuttering for a few moments more. Sasuke figured that if she didn't start to make sense soon he'd shut the door in her face and she could try again later. But there was a niggling little voice in the back of his head that he vaguely recognised as Naruto warning him to be nice.

"What's up Sakura?" he asked in a monotone.

"I uh, well, wow, I picked good didn't I? Those pants really bring out your…erm…I mean, they look nice."

Sasuke forced himself not to roll his eyes. "Naruto's in the shower. Didn't you just see him at training?"

"Oh, I didn't come here looking for Naruto. I uh, wanted to talk to you. Can I come in?"

Sasuke sighed. Being nice was difficult. All he'd wanted to do was get rid of whoever was at the door then fuck his dobe senseless up against the shower door. Was that too much to ask for?

He reluctantly stepped back and allowed her to come inside. While she sat on the couch he took off his arm guards and stood there wondering if he should go grab a shirt or something after all. He decided not to, really hoping that Sakura wouldn't be here long enough to bug him too much with her staring anyway. He supposed he probably should just be thankful that she wasn't wondering why he was walking around Naruto's apartment half dressed while said owner of the apartment was taking a shower.

"I was, er, wondering what your plans were for Yule Eve?"

Well, he hadn't been expecting _that._ He hadn't even realised that was even coming up.

"I'm staying in," he told her. _With a naked Naruto tied to his bed,_ Sasuke added internally.

"Oh, because I was wondering if you might like to do something."

"I am doing something," he reminded her.

"No, I uh mean, with me. If you wanted to."

Boy, this girl just couldn't be let down easily.

"So just you and me and my three Anbu guards then?" Sasuke asked pointedly.

Sakura looked mortified for a moment like she figured she'd just said something horribly insensitive. "I'm sorry, I forgot about that."

Thankfully Naruto took that moment to re-appear after his shower. Possibly unlucky for him though that he'd heeded Sasuke's last order not to put on any clothes as he just wandered in. Obviously he thought their guest must be Kakashi too because Naruto wouldn't be bashful about his teacher seeing him in a towel and little else. But his eyes got real wide when he saw Sakura sitting on the couch staring at him with just as much shock.

"Oh um, hi Sakura-chan. I'll just uh, go put some clothes on then," he muttered before disappearing into the bedroom and closing the door behind him.

Sasuke watched him go and frowned darkly. Now he was really annoyed.

"Was there anything else?" he asked Sakura a little too sharply.

"Well I don't care about the guards. Besides, I don't think it would be difficult to ask Tsunade-sama to let you off just for one little night."

Sasuke was pretty sure Tsunade would rather drown herself in a recently used and unflushed toilet than let Sasuke off for five minutes. Since he'd gotten back they hadn't exactly gotten along real well. It was totally his fault of course. After all she obviously couldn't help being such a controlling bitch all the time.

"I doubt that," Sasuke told her and he could see from her expression that she hadn't really believed it anyway.

"Oh well I don't mind if we had company I-"

"I'm going to stay in. It's not really my thing."

"Oh, okay. Well couldn't hurt to ask. I just thought it might be nice, this being your first time back in the village for years and everything."

"Thanks for the offer," he said trying to sound at least a little polite knowing that Naruto probably had his ear to the door right about now.

He'd thought it was a pretty dismissive sentence, but Sakura stayed seated where she was while the silence dragged on.

"Did you want something else?"

"You don't like, have a date already do you?" Sakura asked quickly. Obviously the question had been bothering her.

"No," he replied honestly.

"Okay then. I better get going. Say 'hi' to Naruto for me."

She got up and left and Sasuke was careful to lock the door behind her before going to the closed door of Naruto's room. Before he opened it he called very loudly at the wood at about the height of where he suspected Naruto's ear was pressed, "Sakura said to say hi!"

He heard a muffled 'fuck' before Naruto wrenched the door open and glared at Sasuke. "Did you have to deafen me?"

"You know it's rude to eavesdrop."

"_You're_ giving _me_ a lecture about what's rude?"

"I thought I was being nice."

"Maybe for you that was nice, but for us regular humans it wasn't the best effort."

"She said my new pants really bought out my erm," Sasuke told him accusingly.

Naruto winced. "Sorry. You know, I thought I'd managed to talk her out of asking you out. But hey, another few conversations like that and she probably wont want to ask you anymore, nice erm or no."

"Well it keeps you coming back for more despite the fact you think I'm a jerk."

"The whole is greater than the sum of its parts," Naruto quoted. "Kakashi told me that. Even if most of your parts are made up of asshole, jerk and bastard."

"Better than dobe, moron and annoying."

The words lacked any real malice though probably because he was still only wearing a towel and Sasuke didn't seem in the mood to pick a fight. He grabbed the front of the towel and dragged Naruto closer.

"Now where were we?"

"I called you a bastard," Naruto said as Sasuke leaned in toward him.

"Before that."

"Jerk."

"Before that," Sasuke said flicking his tongue across Naruto's bottom lip.

"Assho-ah…"

Sasuke had trailed his lips down Naruto's neck till he reached a spot that he knew could make Naruto stop talking and refocus on what he wanted. Naruto's little weak spot in the crook of his neck. Sasuke nibbled it while pushing him backwards through the bedroom door.

"Getting closer." Sasuke murmured against his neck with a smirk.

* * *

><p>Naruto couldn't sleep. He lay with his elbow crooked and his head in his hand and watched the gentle rise and fall of Sasuke's chest as he slept next to him. The moonlight filtered in through the open blinds and it made Sasuke's skin look like creamy milk. His free hand rested on Sasuke's stomach with Sasuke's hand laying loosely over the top but Naruto wanted the use of his hand to flick away one of Sasuke's bangs that had fallen over his face obscuring Naruto's view of him.<p>

As soon as he moved his arm though, Sasuke woke up with a small sigh and stretched a little while Naruto took care of the offending bit of hair. Sasuke's eyes flicked over to him briefly before closing again.

"Are you watching me sleep? Because if you are, it's really creepy."

"Then I'm creepy. Hey Sasuke, is there anything you want?"

Sasuke opened his eyes again, locking his gaze onto Naruto's. "Why?"

"If you had heaps of money, what would be the first thing you'd go out and buy?"

"Better clothes."

"Teme! I'm serious."

"Look I can't know what to say if you don't tell me what this is about."

"What? So you can give me the answer you think I want?"

"Basically."

Naruto made an irritated noise and dropped onto his back. Sasuke must have sensed the question was more serious than it sounded because he rolled over and turned Naruto's head to reconnect their eyes.

"What is this about?"

"Nothing important I guess. I was just wondering if there was something you missed having, that's all."

"There is something," Sasuke replied after a moment. "But it's not something I can go out and buy."

"What is it?" Naruto asked fearing he might start talking about his inability to use chakra anymore.

Sasuke frowned slightly. "I miss not feeling lost."

"Huh?" Naruto asked confused when it wasn't what he had expected.

"It's hard to explain. I miss not having a clear purpose, I miss feeling like I belong."

"You belong here," Naruto told him quietly.

Sasuke sort of moved his head in a small shrug and rolled away to look up at the ceiling instead. "With you maybe. But I don't really feel connected to the 'here' part. Before I had a mission, clear goals and something to strive for. Here, I don't have that. And I can't return to a family or anything else that might immediately make me feel at home either."

Naruto hadn't meant to depress Sasuke, he'd just wanted to find out what he wanted in the way of presents. But he could see why Sasuke was so hard to buy for, he only wanted the things in life that couldn't be purchased with money. But Sasuke had unintentionally given him an idea and the more he thought about it, the more he liked it.

He reached across and laid his arm over Sasuke again knowing that he wouldn't be able to fall asleep without the touch and yawned widely.

"Yes you can."

* * *

><p>Naruto made himself scarce while Sasuke was still in bed this morning leaving him a note about needing to run some errands before training. Which was partially true but he'd left out a lot. Today was Yule Eve and Naruto had some shopping to do. He'd incessantly bugged Sakura on the details of what her family traditions were around this time of year. Apparently there weren't many and basically consisted of a chicken dinner, Yule Cake and if you were the romantic type, going out on a date and presents.<p>

Well going _out_ wasn't going to happen, not this year at least. But the rest could be done and Naruto was determined to start some traditions of his own. Besides, this wasn't just for Sasuke in some ways because Naruto had never experienced these kinds of traditions either so he was pretty excited about it himself.

So he ordered the cake, one just like Sakura said was her favourite, ordered dinner and the present had been ordered over a week ago. Everything would be ready for him to pick up on his way home from training. So he turned up to training with a big smile of his face and a spring in his step.

Tonight was going to be awesome!

* * *

><p>Sasuke got up not long after Naruto left and after taking a shower and staring at the walls for about half and hour he decided that even wandering around the village was better than sitting here all day with nothing to do. He'd read all the books Naruto had bought home to him from the library so he figured he might as well go get more if that's all he had to occupy himself with these days.<p>

He got dressed in the clothes Sakura had bought for him, the black pants and the dark red shirt that Naruto seemed to think was the pick of the bunch. The shirt was okay he supposed. It was a sort of sleeveless knit shirt with a zip up the front. It clung to him more than he'd prefer but at least it was better than wandering around in Naruto's clothes all the time.

So he left the apartment with his books under one arm and feeling very naked without his weapons in what he considered to be hostile territory. He scored a few glares and stares as he walked through the village, which he'd gotten good at ignoring. This was however the first time he'd left the apartment without Naruto by his side and he could see the difference in people's attitudes already. When he was with Naruto he was best friend of the village hero who mustn't be too evil after all if Naruto trusted him. But alone he was just Uchiha Sasuke, ex-rogue who was nothing to this village except a traitor.

Well, whatever, like he cared what they thought. He was only here for one person, the rest could die in screaming agony for all he cared.

He was just passing the park when he had that thought and as though his wish had been granted he did hear a scream or rather more of a distressed yell from somewhere amongst the trees, out of his line of sight. The sound was enough to make him stop for a moment but only because of the coincidence before he started moving on in the direction of the library once more.

Why exactly he stopped the second time he heard it, he wasn't quite sure. Even more mystifying when he found himself heading toward the sound to see what the issue was.

He walked in amongst the trees, stopping short when he saw five boys pushing around a sixth kid who already had a bleeding nose and a soon to be very swollen eye from the beating he had already taken at the hands of his aggressors. The boys hadn't seen him yet and Sasuke hadn't made an effort to make his presence known because he still wasn't quite sure what he was going to do about all of this or even whether he would do anything at all. After all, what did it matter to him what happened to this boy? He was simply part of a village that hated him and certainly wouldn't thank him for his interference.

And if the boy didn't have slightly blood smeared bright blond hair, he would have just moved on. Naruto had said to him in the past that he could have been Sasuke given his start in life. He could have hated the people who seemed to hate him, given up and sought revenge just like Sasuke had. This boy could grow up to hate his fellows for being disliked and beaten, or he could be shown that not everybody was an enemy and that there were people that cared just like Naruto had.

_Fuck me,_ Sasuke thought morosely, _It's because of Naruto isn't it? I wouldn't care one bit about this if it weren't for him. _

Sasuke didn't think of himself as any sort of hero like Naruto was, but for today, for this boy, he supposed could seem like less of a devil.

He stepped into view of the boys and cleared his throat. "Five against one, that's brave of you," Sasuke said openly mocking the bullies.

The bullies didn't seem to recognise him, they were all about five years younger than him after all. All they saw was a regular person with a stack of books under one arm. They all had headbands themselves, probably village genin, and therefore didn't see Sasuke as much of a threat.

"What's it to you book worm?" The apparent leader mocked him with what he must have assumed was high humour to judge by the way he laughed at his own joke. They were completely unafraid of the older Sasuke who wore no signs of being a village shinobi. "This little punk thinks he's better than us just because he's the only one that could hit the kunai target in class. We hate show offs."

Well then they were about to hate Sasuke a lot. Sasuke activated his Sharingan and stared at the leader whose face had just gone from smug to petrified in all of about three seconds. He might not recognise Sasuke by first sight, but he recognised the infamous Uchiha kekkei genkai when he saw it. His clan might be dead, but everyone had heard of the traitor Uchiha who'd come back to the village.

"Run!" The leader yelled before all five boys tried to scurry off between the trees at a fast pace.

But Sasuke was faster, not even dropping his books he ran forward and grabbed the leader by his collar before he could get away. He threw the kid by his collar onto the ground and put a foot on his chest before the kid could think to rise again.

"I'm not going to demand an apology," Sasuke told him letting the terrified kid stare into the depths of his red eyes, "Because I know you wont really mean it right now. But I promise you that if I see you ganging up five against one again, against someone who is supposed to be your ally no less, I will _make_ you feel sorry for _ever_ taking your very first breath in this world. I will rip a meaningful apology from your throat by that point made too sore from screaming in pain at what I will do to you. Do you understand me?"

The kid nodded quickly, his eyes never leaving Sasuke's. Sasuke watched him for a moment longer before finally deciding that he had gotten the message before removing his foot and watching the kid bolt into the trees.

Sasuke then walked over and helped the initial victim of the beating to his feet and crouched down to give him a brief inspection. "You'll live," he informed the boy before straightening up.

He was just about to turn and leave when he felt a tug on his arm and turned to see the boy had a hold of his wrist. Sasuke didn't really like people touching him so the look he gave the boy must have been warning enough for him to let go as though Sasuke's skin had burned him.

"Uh, you're Uchiha Sasuke, aren't you?" The boy asked timidly.

Here it came, the hate, the revulsion. _Whatever._

"I knew it wasn't true what they said about you. I know you're not bad, you saved me. That was so cool what you did. I'm surprised he didn't pee his pants!"

Sasuke blinked at the kid in shock. He probably should have said something nice or polite at this point, but he was too surprised to pretend right now. "Maybe you should learn to save yourself in the future."

Instead of taking offence though, the boy seemed to find the words encouraging. "I will Uchiha-sama. Thank you!"

After watching the boy for a confused moment longer Sasuke turned and started back on his way to the library, still pretty unsure how to take that particular compliment.

* * *

><p>When Naruto got home he kicked off his shoes and not seeing Sasuke in the main room, put the dinner he'd bought in the oven to keep warm and made a beeline for the bedroom. He found him there, laying on his stomach, shirtless and facing the opposite direction, propped up by his arms so he could read his book.<p>

"I'm home!" Naruto announced coming into the room balancing a cake in one hand and shoving two small boxes into his pocket with the other.

"No shit," Sasuke replied not looking around.

Nonplussed by this reaction, Naruto climbed onto the bed put one knee either side of Sasuke's waist and leaned over to kiss the exposed skin of his shoulder while sliding the cake in front of Sasuke's face on top of the book he was trying to read.

"Merry Yule, Teme."

Sasuke looked at the cake silently for a moment as though trying to work out why it was sitting on his book. "What's this?"

"It's a Yule Cake!" Naruto informed him happily.

"I know what it is Dobe. Why do you have one?"

"I've never gotten one before so I thought I'd get one this year."

"Why?"

Naruto frowned, his happy moment slowly being beaten down in the face of Sasuke's blunt questioning.

"Because this is the first year I…" Naruto didn't want to sound too mushy because it would only lead to bad teasing. "You don't like cake?"

"Not really."

"Oh," Naruto replied crestfallen. "How can you not like cake?" he persisted after a moment. "Everyone likes cake!"

"Not me."

"You like strawberries though right? I _know_ you like strawberries. You can eat the strawberries off the top."

Sasuke reached forward and plucked a whole strawberry off the top of the cake which came away covered in cream and icing, stared at it for a moment before passing it up toward Naruto. "Lick the icing off for me."

Naruto bent forward to comply when a blob of cream dropped off hitting Sasuke's shoulder.

"It just dripped on me didn't it?" Sasuke asked with faint annoyance.

"Don't worry, I'll clean it off," Naruto assured him. He went ahead and sucked the icing off the strawberry first though. And while Sasuke took a bite of the newly cleaned fruit, Naruto ducked his head down and sucked the cream off Sasuke's shoulder. He was perhaps being a tad too thorough though when he ran his tongue over his shoulder and up his neck.

Sasuke disrupted him by turning over then, careful to slide down so he didn't end up putting his head into the cake.

"Maybe cake isn't so bad after all," he allowed.

Naruto grinned down at him and then kissed him while reaching up to grab another strawberry. He intentionally made sure it was well covered before drawing back and holding it over Sasuke's chest. Very slowly he drew the strawberry over Sasuke's skin leaving behind a trail of cream and sweet icing. He managed to get most of the mess onto Sasuke before teasing along Sasuke's lips with the fruit. But when Sasuke opened his mouth to accept it, he took it away and covered Sasuke's lips with his own slipping his tongue into the open mouth sliding it against Sasuke's tongue momentarily before drawing away to lick and suck the mess he'd left behind on Sasuke's skin. He slid his tongue slowly up the cream trail deviating occasionally to nip and suck at a nipple. Finished, he sat up just as Sasuke was opening slightly glazed eyes.

"You have cream on your jacket," Sasuke pointed out with a light smirk.

Naruto frowned at his jacket noticing what had happened before taking that and his shirt off and giving them a toss onto the floor.

"You look like you could do with some more cake," Sasuke told him.

Naruto couldn't help but smile at that one. But this time, instead of the strawberry he ran his finger through the top layers of the cake and used that to trace sticky lines over Sasuke before licking them thoroughly away. He took his time, sliding his tongue over warm pale skin whether there was anything to lick off or not. Sasuke wasn't making a great deal of sound, but Naruto could tell he was getting to him. The not quite regular sound of his breath hitching occasionally and his muscles tensing and un-tensing every so often.

Naruto licked his way down to the waistband of Sasuke's pants, deftly undoing them and kissing the small vee of newly exposed skin.

It was at this point Sasuke apparently had enough. He sat up and grabbed Naruto, rolling him onto his back and settling himself between Naruto's legs.

"What do you think you're doing?" Sasuke asked leaning over him.

Naruto tried his best to look innocent. "Eating Yule Cake?"

"Uh huh. Since when do _you_ tease _me_?"

"If you didn't want me to learn, you shouldn't do it to me so often."

Sasuke watched him carefully for a few silent moments, gazing into his eyes without blinking. Then Sasuke sat up, confusing the hell out of Naruto. He'd thought things were going well, great even, but Sasuke didn't seem to like what he'd seen in his eyes.

"You're trying too hard."

"What?"

"You look apprehensive about something. I don't want…" Sasuke began, but like usual before he could share too much he just shook his head and began to move away. "Forget it."

_Well, fuck that._

Naruto sat up quickly and grabbed him before he could move too far. "What the fuck Sasuke?"

"Let go."

"No."

"You're hiding something," Sasuke accused.

"You're one to talk. I thought things were going well."

"So you _are_ hiding something."

"Sure I am. But it's a surprise."

"A surprise?" Sasuke asked blinking at him.

"Well sure. What did you think I was hiding?"

Sasuke opened his mouth to reply but closed it again almost immediately. Eventually he said, "I thought you might feel guilty. You hardly ever spend any free time away from me. And now cake and this…"

Naruto didn't have to ask what guilt Sasuke was referring to. And the truth was that he did feel guilty about all Sasuke had been through to be here with him. He knew it, Sasuke knew it and even though Sasuke often would use it to his own favour to win a lot of arguments, Naruto could see that it really bothered him. Not only what he'd lost, but how Naruto felt about it too.

But, "If you think this has got anything to do with that you've got another thing coming. You think I'm spending so much time with you because I feel guilty? I might feel guilty, but that's not why I do it. I'm doing this because it makes me happy and I'm hoping that it makes you happy too. I know that's an alien concept to you and everything but you gotta learn that people sometimes do things for you because they want to, not because they have some other motive. Jeez, and you call me a moron!"

Sasuke didn't look like he was going to move away again but he looked perfectly serious when he replied, "You are a moron."

Naruto smiled crookedly at that. "See, why would I want to spend any time away from you when you say such nice things to me."

"I see you've picked up sarcasm from me too then, not just the ability to tease."

Naruto leaned in and kissed him once briefly and murmured, "Maybe if you try hard enough something else of yours will rub off on me too."

Sasuke kissed him back a little less chastely than the one Naruto had given him and pushed him back to where he had been before with Sasuke pressed up against him, with lips moving against one another. Clothes were kicked off and hot skin met hot skin and Naruto groaned thinking, _and why the hell would I want to be anywhere else?_

* * *

><p>"Oh shit!" Naruto said sitting up quickly in bed.<p>

"What?" Sasuke asked stretching a little and wincing at sore muscles. They'd been quietly dozing next to each other after having…cake and Sasuke had been quite content to drift off to sleep where he was.

"I forgot about the chicken!"

Sasuke spent a few moments trying to work out why chicken was so important right now, or really at any time, and eventually gave up.

"I'm sure the chicken will forgive you."

"No, I mean I bought home chicken dinner for us. I put it in the oven to keep warm, I hope it's still good."

"As long as you didn't cook it, it should be good," Sasuke replied turning over and trying to get comfortable again.

"Funny, asshole. Are you hungry, I could go get you some?"

"I'm not hungry after all that cake. By the way, I think the rest of the cake ended up on the floor."

"Oh, did it?" Naruto leant over him to inspect what was left of the demolished cake on the floor. "Pity, that was tasty."

"I'm certainly a convert."

"I got that special you know. I didn't know what to get but Sakura told me all about the family traditions and I wanted to get it right." Naruto told him leaning back and sighing. "I guess I kinda suck at this."

There was no way Sasuke was going to drift off to sleep with a comment like that left unquestioned. So he sat up so he could look directly at Naruto. "What do you mean? Why do you care what Sakura and her family do?"

"Well it's Yule. I thought I could make it special and I didn't want to ask what your family…never mind. Look I shouldn't have bought it up."

Sasuke did remember the family traditions. His father always used to bring home a cake, he remembered now, and then they'd have a family dinner. It didn't really hurt to remember such things like Naruto must have assumed it might. It sort of made him ache a little, but he generally just tried not to think about it.

"So this was for me?"

"Well mostly. I don't know about family traditions 'cause I've never had any. Traditions or family really. This year, well, you're my family now and I wanted to start some new traditions."

Sasuke watched him for a moment thinking that through carefully. Naruto obviously didn't like the silence though because he just looked more nervous as the seconds went by without a response.

"Well you're off to a good start," Sasuke told him eventually. "We should definitely have cake more often."

It probably wasn't the response Naruto had been hoping for but he smiled just a little anyway. "You're such a perv."

"So," Sasuke continued. "Is this about the other night, when you were asking me what I wanted? You think I wanted this?"

"Not really. I guess I wanted this more than you did. But you said all that stuff about family and not belonging and I wanted you to feel like I was your family I guess."

"I already told you I felt like I belonged with you," Sasuke reminded him. "You aren't the problem."

"Oh yeah, the present!"

Sasuke watched baffled as Naruto found his pants that were slung over the end of the bed and rooted around in the pockets till he found what he was apparently looking for. He retrieved two flat though small boxes one blue box, one red. He handed the blue one to Sasuke.

"Don't open it yet, I want to show you this one first."

"You bought me something?"

"Yeah, this is supposed to be like a romantic night or whatever. I'm supposed to get you a present. That was the surprise."

"I didn't get you anything," Sasuke pointed out more bothered by that than he expected to be.

"You're here aren't you? Considering what you had to do to be here, I think that's present enough for me."

Naruto opened the red box and pulled out a silver chain and held it up for Sasuke to see. Dangling on the end of the chain was the red and white Uchiha crest about the size of his thumbnail. It looked finely done and pretty expensive. Sasuke reached out to take it but Naruto drew it away.

"I know this symbol is a part of your family heritage that you're really proud of. I know that this is what makes you think of family, but I don't want you to wear it."

Naruto took the chain and slipped it over his head so that the little Uchiha crest dropped down against his chest. Sasuke reached over and fingered the crest sitting against Naruto's skin before looking up into hopeful blue eyes.

"This isn't necessary," Sasuke told him.

"What, you don't want me to wear it because I'm not part of your clan?" Naruto asked getting the wrong impression.

"That's not what I meant. You don't need to wear this for me to think of you as family."

Naruto grinned and reached up to take it off but Sasuke stopped him. "Doesn't mean I don't like seeing it there though. I like having you marked like that."

"Possessive much?" Naruto asked with a wry grin.

Sasuke just smirked and shrugged. "So what's this one?" He asked tapping the box in his hands.

"Well that's one for you to wear. You can open it if you want."

Sasuke did so. It was the same kind of long silver chain but at the end of this one hung the red spiral symbol of the village. Sasuke looked at him quizzically.

"Uh, I don't really have a family crest like you do, but this is better anyway. That's the symbol for the village. I know you don't feel like you really belong here anymore. And I'm sorry to say this Sasuke, but a lot of that is your fault. People here don't like you for what you did, but you aren't making an effort to change their minds about you either. You're rude to everyone, you glare at them and you hide out in here reading books most of the time. But I know now that's because you don't feel connected to anyone else. I figure that if you could feel connected in some small way you might to start to think of this as your home. You said a moment ago that you liked me being marked as yours, then I want you to see yourself marked with the symbol of the village. I belong to you and you belong here. See you _can_ go home to your family Sasuke, because I'm your family, me and everyone else that cares about you. You just have to make that connection again and I think a reminder like that will help."

Even two days ago, Sasuke might have scoffed and told Naruto exactly what he thought of belonging to _this_ village, swearing included. But Naruto had put a lot of thought into this. Obviously he thought that if Sasuke wore the symbol he'd feel more like he belonged. He wasn't sure how it would make him feel to wear it but it sure as hell wasn't the cure all that Naruto seemed to think it was. Still, he remembered earlier today, helping that boy out. The boy had thanked him, shown him respect even knowing who he was. Perhaps it wasn't too much to hope for that he couldn't at least start to fit in a little more in the future.

So Sasuke slipped the chain over his head and watched Naruto's eyes flick down to it and smile.

"We're both marked now," Naruto told him. "Let's hope we can live up to it."

* * *

><p>Naruto and Sasuke spent Yule day on the training ground. Previously Sasuke had been resistant to spar knowing full well that he couldn't use ninjutsu. Well not much, and not that Naruto or anyone else knew. But Naruto had just wanted to spar like the old days, no ninjutsu, no genjutsu, just beating each other up and having a little fun. Sasuke was a little rusty, he had to admit, but he was pleased to discover that he could still beat Naruto in a taijutsu match even if Naruto did give him a good run for his money. Of course if both of them were able to fight at full strength against each other Sasuke knew the win would not have been so easy.<p>

"I can't believe you can still beat me," Naruto lamented as Sasuke helped him up off the ground.

"Believe it, dobe."

"Yeah well I-"

"Hi guys!"

The pair turned to see Sakura jogging up to them, a smile on her face. Sasuke wanted to roll his eyes, but he didn't. Naruto just waved back and waited for the girl to get closer to them.

"Happy Yule!" she greeted. "I looked around everywhere for you both. What have you got planned for the day?" The question was mainly directed at Sasuke but Naruto answered for them.

"Nothing much. Have you got plans with your family?"

"No, not really. I came to see if you guys wanted to get dinner tonight."

"Your treat?" Naruto asked hopefully.

"Dream on Naruto. Oh by the way, how was the cake? You got the one I told you to right?"

It took all of Naruto's willpower not to grin like a maniac at the question. But he could really say _oh, it was awesome, I spent half the night licking it off Sasuke's body._ So instead he settled for.

"It was good. Thanks for the suggestion."

"Did you get to have any of it Sasuke-kun or did pig Naruto end up eating it all?"

"The strawberries were nice," Sasuke told her watching out of the corner of his eye as Naruto's own eye started twitching from not being able to laugh. It was probably a good time to get Sakura away from Naruto before he lost it. "Sakura can I talk to you for a second?"

"Oh, of course."

Sasuke led her away from a confused looking Naruto till they were out of earshot. "Dinner tonight? Was that invitation really for both of us?"

Sakura might seem like she was a fatuous girl sometimes but she wasn't stupid, not really, and she knew what he was really asking.

"It's for the whole team actually. Kakashi sensei wanted me to ask you and Naruto. I'm going to check with Sai after this. But if you wanted to, one night we could-"

"I don't want to date you," Sasuke told her bluntly. Her expression was somewhere between mortified and upset. "But I would like us to be friends," he continued a little more solicitously.

Okay so that kind of eased her expression as she seemed to take it in. She still didn't look happy, but she smiled despite it. Even Sakura must have realised what an olive branch this was and although her feelings probably weren't going to go away overnight, at least she knew where she stood and if she wanted it to be, it could be as one of his friends. Something Sasuke was in very short supply of these days.

"I want that too. Thank you, Sasuke."

The two parted after a moment more of making plans and Sasuke returned to Naruto a small smile on his face.

"What was that about?" Naruto asked.

Sasuke shrugged like it wasn't a big thing. "Just making friends."

Naruto plainly didn't understand at first but eventually the meaning sunk in that Sasuke was trying to be nice and that he had pretty much called Sakura his friend too.

"I'm proud of you Sasuke."

"Don't get too gushy. Sai's coming tonight as well apparently."

Naruto grinned. "Just don't murder him before the main course and I'll still be proud of you."

"I make no promises."

The End.

* * *

><p><em>Wow, that was long! So much for one chaptered fluff, it was bigger than two of my regular chapters. Hope it wasn't too hard to get through. And I do aplogise for the lack of descriptive sex, apparently my smut muse takes Christmas off, who knew. But it was a huge chapter, my biggest to date so hopefully that's compensation enough.<em>

_Oh and any and all Tsunade bashing was all Sasuke's doing and not the personal feelings of the author. Haha, just because I like her most of the time doesn't mean Sasuke has to lol. Sorry, I felt I might get a little singed for that one. Anyway, I hope it was a nice little read and you all enjoyed it. I just wanted to do something nice to everyone who has been so nice to me during the writing of this series and afterwards. I may or may not continue this story though probably not in the near future. I haven't decided. For now, think of this as a little Christmas treat and I hope you enjoyed it!_

_ Meri Kurisumasu,_

_ Dash._


	8. WNL White Day Special

_Notes: So I missed writing something for Valentine's Day because I had too much on at the time but then KawaiiGaara had the fantastic idea to write something for White Day instead which gave me a lot more great ideas than the few I'd had for the Valentine's fic. So yay KawaiiGaara to whom, if anyone enjoys this at all, great thanks should be forthcoming :) Cause if the idea hadn't been put into my head you would not be reading this._

_So by this point as well I'm hoping everyone is up to date. That includes reading I Want You to Want To, I Need You and I'd Love You trilogy as well as the Yule Special. Of course if you haven't read all of them it isn't necessary, but you might be a little confused in some places. _

_Oh and I know making chocolate might not be the guy thing to do for White Day like it is for the girls on Valentine's Day but it fit with my story so I decided to run with it anyway :) Oh and btw, I've never made white chocolate before, just a heads up._

_Enjoy!_

_Dash._

**WNL White Day Special.**

"Damnit, I don't have enough money for this shit!" Kiba exclaimed.

They were sitting at Ichiraku's for a shared meal for once. Lately there weren't a lot of jobs on offer so quite a few of his friends had been hanging around town with not much to do.

Today Sakura had met him for lunch and he had dragged Kiba along in his wake after coming across him shouting at shop windows about prices.

Naruto still hadn't been sure why he'd been doing that, but figured there was little that ramen couldn't fix and persuaded him to come along.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Naruto asked him while Kiba ignored the food in front of him and eyed a list he was holding.

"Fucking White Day."

Sakura immediately smiled at the reminder and even went a little pink. "Oh I love white day!"

"Yeah you would", Kiba groused. "All you girls have to do is give out some chocolate on Valentine's. The guys are the ones who then have to go out and spend lots of money on each girl who gave him something. It's stupid!"

"What?" Naruto asked perplexed. "You have to buy presents for everyone? Why not just buy something for the ones you actually like?"

Kiba gave him a weird look. "Haven't you had to buy anything before?"

Naruto swallowed his next mouthful of food while he shook his head. "No. I mean I've gotten Valentine's chocolates before. I get at least one lot every year, but whoever keeps giving them to me never leaves a note or anything."

Kiba, who knew perfectly well who was leaving the chocolates for him, just rolled his eyes and focussed back on his list.

"Well you're lucky. It's rude not to give a gift back…apparently. Doesn't matter whether you like 'em or not. But there's no jobs, so I'm broke. Sure I only got three gifts this year, but broke is broke. The only reason I'm here with you guys is 'cause Naruto said he'd treat me."

"I did not!"

"Look Kiba," Sakura began, ignoring Naruto's outburst. "You don't have to spend a heap of money. Just make some chocolate like the girls probably did for you, but make more than they gave you. That should be okay. If a guy who I really liked actually made something for me it would be even better than jewellery."

"You're so full of shit," Kiba accused her. "What girl would want handmade chocolates when they could have expensive jewellery?"

"I told you I would! It's either that or nothing since you don't have any money."

Kiba sighed and tucked the list away. "You're probably right. Fine, maybe Hana knows how to make it. If she doesn't, I _know_ Hinata knows how."

Naruto frowned at his empty bowl obviously not picking up Kiba's hint. "You know Sasuke got heaps of chocolate for Valentine's."

"Really?" Kiba asked surprised.

"Well he's always been popular with girls."

"Yeah but he's also an ex-rogue who-"

"It would be better if you didn't finish that sentence Kiba," Sakura warned.

"Well anyway, I'm surprised he's still so popular that's all."

"I wonder if Sasuke knows about this White Day stuff," Naruto mused.

"I don't think he'd care," Kiba predicted.

Naruto sighed. "Yeah you're probably right."

"He's still living at your place while he's under guard right?" Kiba asked suddenly. "I'm surprised you haven't killed each other by now. When you were kids, you two used to fight like cats in a sack."

"We still do," Naruto admitted before adding in his head, _But the make up sex makes it worth it now._ "It's alright when you learn how to handle him."

"It's amazing," Sakura interjected. "I've never seen them get along so well," she grinned. "The name calling sounds almost affectionate now."

Naruto went a little red at that statement. Sakura was just teasing him, but it was pretty true.

"Not funny Sakura-chan."

"Ah don't tease him," Kiba told her. "I feel sorry for him having to live with Sasuke. I mean you're friends and all, but if I had to live with some of _my_ friends I'd want to kill them too. And they're a lot nicer than Sasuke."

Naruto wanted to tell them that he liked living with Sasuke, despite the occasional arguments and Sasuke's general jerk moments. But he didn't like how that might sound. Nobody knew about them and it was better for everyone involved if it stayed that way. But he loved Sasuke and he wouldn't want Sasuke to be anywhere else.

"I'm used to him," Naruto said simply.

* * *

><p>Predictably, Sasuke was reading when Naruto came home. His favourite reading spot was on Naruto's bed next to the window where he would sit reclined slightly in order maximize comfort while getting the best light. He mustn't have been at it for too long though because his hair was still damp from a recent shower, telling him Sasuke had been exercising while he'd been gone.<p>

The pair sparred every now and then, but apart from that and the occasional walk to the library, Sasuke didn't get any other exercise. Well maybe a bit more when they were in the mood. So Sasuke would often exercise a little indoors trying to keep himself in shape when no other opportunity presented itself. And he tended to push himself too which Naruto complained about. He'd almost make himself sick before he would stop so he tended to do it now when Naruto left the house.

Naruto flung his jacket onto the end of the bed before climbing on to sit next to Sasuke who still hadn't looked at him. He was wearing an old faded pair of Naruto's pants with no shirt and Naruto could see the little silver and red Konoha crest glinting on his skin.

"You're home," Sasuke acknowledged, still not looking up.

"Obvious much. What are you reading?"

Sasuke at that point did lay the book down on his lap while he stretched. It was a sight to behold.

"About the best time for planting corn."

Naruto could never understand Sasuke's reading habits. These days he'd read about any old thing just to keep himself occupied whether it actually interested him or not.

"You're so weird."

"Whatever, you were the one just checking me out. So what does that make you?"

"Weirder," Naruto replied without hesitation. "Sasuke, have you heard of White Day?"

"Of course. Why?"

"So you used to buy presents for every girl that gave you a gift on Valentine's Day?"

Naruto was impressed. Sasuke must have gotten at least a dozen presents this year, so he couldn't imagine how many he used to get when he had been a bit more liked by the general populous.

"No."

"What?" Naruto asked temporarily derailed. "I thought it was rude or something not to give a present back whether you liked the girl or not."

Sasuke raised one single black eyebrow at this. "So you think I wouldn't be rude to someone?"

Naruto could understand his mistake as soon as he'd said it. Sasuke was rude to everyone in varying degrees. If he was only a little bit withdrawn and nasty around you it meant that he really liked you. Of course Sasuke wouldn't care if he was being mean.

"Uh, right. I didn't think about that. But you got like a dozen presents this year, you should do _something_."

Watching Sasuke's impassive face Naruto got the distinct impression that Sasuke was genuinely thinking this through. Naruto had told Sasuke to make an effort to fit in and while normally he wouldn't care about a bunch of love-struck girls with an impossible crush, he knew that his answer might show unwillingness to fit in. And that would upset Naruto. Really upset him, more than their usual petty arguments.

"Look," Naruto persisted, "Sakura told me that giving gifts back doesn't mean anything, you wouldn't be leading anyone on unless you got them something really special. It's just a tradition. Sakura suggested that making a bunch of chocolates for them would be okay. What do you think?"

"I think it's stupid," Sasuke told him bluntly before adding, "but I'll do it on two conditions."

"And what are those?"

"One: you have to help. I'm not making that many chocolates on my own especially because this is your idea. And Two: I require my helper to be half naked. Whichever half is completely up to you."

"Gee, thanks Sasuke. Why do I suddenly feel like this is suddenly more for your benefit rather than all those girls?"

Sasuke smiled. "Because sometimes even you can be surprisingly perceptive."

* * *

><p>Sakura had given Naruto her recipe for chocolate, but Naruto was more than happy to ditch it when Sasuke stated that he knew how to make it. Both of them had eaten Sakura's chocolate before, and it was closer to dog food than chocolate and giving that stuff out was less of a thank you and more of a fuck you for the recipients.<p>

"How the hell do you know how to make white chocolate? Did you poison some and use it to assassinate someone once?"

Naruto asked, leaning back against the kitchen bench opposite to where Sasuke was sorting out ingredients. Naruto was wearing nothing but his orange pants and a frown. He didn't like cooking at the best of times and Sasuke could get especially bossy when he knew what he was doing and Naruto didn't. For Naruto it didn't sound like a happy night ahead for him.

But he had acceded to both of Sasuke's requests. He would help him out and was going shirtless. Going pants less wasn't even in the cards because a clumsy cook should always wear pants in the kitchen and also because he figured it would distract Sasuke way too much and they'd never get anything done.

"Not yet, but if you keep it up it might be an option. My mother loved this stuff. I used to help her make it when I was little."

Naruto's grumpy attitude lasted a whole half-second after that.

"Uh, sorry."

"Don't be. I was really young and I'm lucky I remember how to make it at all. Here," Sasuke told him turning and handing Naruto a saucepan with some hard white stuff in it. "Heat that up slowly until it melts."

Naruto went to the stove and put it on the hot plate as instructed.

"What is this stuff anyway?"

"Coco butter. Watch it and make sure it doesn't burn."

Naruto poked at the stuff and moved it around while it slowly melted. Cooking was boring. It was why Naruto tried not to do it whenever possible. Plus he knew he was terrible at it. He had no patience, no talent for picking taste, and usually whatever he did was only barely edible. Sasuke wasn't so bad. He had patience and had learnt a lot over the past couple of months about cooking, but he didn't really like doing it much either so most of their shared meals were whatever take out Naruto would bring home whenever neither of them could be bothered making something themselves.

The novelty of going through the motions with Sasuke was slightly better than if he were absent, but this was going to be a long night. Sasuke had so many presents to make up for that they would be at this all night and tomorrow night before they were all finished. If they were lucky it would only take two nights. But White Day was still four days away so they had some time at least.

He felt arms wrap around him before he felt the warmth of Sasuke step up behind him while he checked on his progress. Sasuke was still slightly taller than him and could just look over his shoulder while Naruto stirred the contents of the saucepan.

He felt Sasuke's palms low on his belly, fingers just resting under the waistband of his pants. He felt warm breath waft against the side of his neck and a low voice in his ear said, "You're doing good."

Well maybe cooking with Sasuke wasn't so bad after all.

"Well it's not exactly hard is it?"

"Oh?"

Sasuke's hands slipped lower, one palm coming to rest high up on his thigh, the other moving down to languidly run his fingers over Naruto's cock, brushing the end lightly with a thumb.

"So you aren't."

Naruto made a long 'mmm' sound at the touch and leaned back into Sasuke's embrace.

"Keep stirring it," Sasuke warned him.

After a few moments of gathering his wits because Sasuke's hand was curling around his rapidly hardening length, he went back to stirring the contents of the saucepan.

"That's really distracting, teme."

"I'd be insulted if it wasn't."

Sasuke pushed against his thigh with his other hand pressing Naruto's lower body more firmly against Sasuke. Through the layers of clothing he could feel the beginnings of Sasuke's own arousal pushing up against the curve of his ass.

Naruto's eyes dropped closed as he leant into Sasuke.

"Keep stirring."

Naruto hadn't realised he'd stopped again. He opened his eyes and went to stir it again before realising it had all melted now anyway.

"It's done," Naruto murmured putting the spoon down and was just about to reach around behind him to Sasuke when Sasuke heard the news.

"Ah good."

Sasuke removed his hands quick as a flash and reached over to take the saucepan handle before going back to the bench with the ingredients. He stopped off to wash his hands and then started adding all of the other ingredients together as though nothing had just happened.

Naruto was left staring at the stove like he'd been bludgeoned.

_That asshole!_

Of course he should have known better. Sasuke might have agreed to this, but there was going to be a part of him that thought he was being forced to do this through emotional blackmail. Sasuke was never one to pass up an opportunity for revenge that was for sure.

Naruto flicked the stove off and went over to lean against the bench Sasuke was working at. By now his mixture was thick and white with just the hints of small black dots through it that Naruto guessed was the vanilla Sasuke had been cutting up before.

"Bastard," Naruto commented.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

Naruto boosted himself up to sit on the bench and rolled his eyes. "You can't do the innocent routine Sasuke. It doesn't work."

"Here," Sasuke said ignoring him and stepping around Naruto's knee so he was standing in between Naruto's legs, holding up a finger covered in the white goop.

And if Sasuke hadn't been smirking at him in that way, Naruto would not have hesitated. But he had the distinct feeling that Sasuke was going to tease him for the entire night because of their little bargain and he didn't know if he felt like playing.

Not that play teasing with Sasuke wasn't awesome. He was generally very inventive and always made it worth all the teasing in the end. But it was that end that Naruto wasn't sure whether Sasuke was going to get to. He would want to draw this out, surely.

Of course Sasuke's patience for cooking didn't reflect his patience for everything. He had little to no patience for Naruto in most things. Which could be bad, but when it came to sex could certainly work against him here if Naruto chose to tease him back.

"I promise I haven't poisoned it," Sasuke told him still holding out his finger.

He opened his mouth and leant down sucking the goop off Sasuke's finger. He was just about to honestly tell Sasuke how good it was before Sasuke stopped him by pressing his lips against Naruto's still slightly open ones and plunging his tongue in. He made a thorough job of it before drawing away and licking his lips.

"Tastes good to me," Sasuke told him.

"Yeah."

Sasuke reached across, stuck his finger into the goop, and drew it out to taste it before screwing up his face.

"Hmmm, not so good that time. It's missing something."

He stuck his finger in again and took it out, cupping Naruto's chin and forcing his head to the side. Naruto felt the warm mixture trace a line down his neck followed swiftly by an even warmer tongue that licked and sucked its way up the sticky trail with slow deliberate movements.

"Yeah, that's better," Sasuke murmured against his neck while reaching down and massaging Naruto through the front of his pants.

This would be Sasuke's plan for revenge. Tease him and leave him. Well maybe it was time to test Sasuke's patience.

Sasuke predictably went to step away before Naruto stuck a few fingers into the mixture as well, and trying not to feel incredibly embarrassed, made sure to keep his eyes on Sasuke as he ran his gooped up fingers down the middle of his chest.

Sasuke watched those fingers closely, following their trail as though it was the most fascinating thing in the world right now.

"Maybe you should make sure," Naruto suggested.

Sasuke's eyes flicked up to his and he smirked at him as though saying 'I know what you are doing,' but he stepped back in and ducked his head down to lick his way up the trail of chocolate as though to add 'but I don't care'.

Sasuke finished and looked up at him. "Better still. But it still doesn't seem right somehow. Let's see."

He pushed a surprised Naruto backwards onto the bench. Before following him up Sasuke grabbed the waist of his pants and dragged them down before climbing up onto the bench in between Naruto's legs and leaning over to kiss him again.

This reminded Naruto a little more of their rougher moments. Not too rough, but not exactly slow either. It also reminded Naruto a little of Yule as well when he'd licked cream and icing off Sasuke till Sasuke had rolled him over and fucked all thoughts of the cake he'd been enjoying out of his head. But he loved these moments, when Sasuke acted like he couldn't live without teasing or touching him. The slight roughness of it just seemed to accentuate his want and need.

Sasuke had managed to manoeuvre them so Naruto now had enough room to draw bent legs up enough to touch his feet to the countertop. He almost ripped the zip off Sasuke's dark red shirt getting it off him and threw it to the floor while Sasuke continued to kiss him.

Sasuke sat back on his knees and Naruto took the opportunity to open the waist of his pants, skidding the zipper down while Sasuke picked up the bowl of liquefied chocolate and upended the bowl over the body laid out in front of him with a smug look.

"You ruined my plans."

Well if this was Sasuke's way of rebelling against having to make the chocolate in the first place it could have been worse. Considering how he handled revenge in the past, really Naruto should have been thankful that's all he did.

But there must have been about a litre of unset chocolate in that bowl that was now running down over Naruto's chest and belly in warm slow rivulets.

"Asshole you wasted all that chooommph-" Naruto began but Sasuke had silenced him by leaning back over him and latching onto his lips with another surprise kiss.

Naruto grinned into the kiss and wrapped his arms around Sasuke to press Sasuke against him. He moved against him a little in order to spread the goop around as much as possible, but Sasuke didn't seem to care about the mess.

"You keep sliding like that against me and I'll take you right here and now," Sasuke murmured against his lips.

It did feel kind of nice. They sort of slid against one another, the chocolate even more runny due to the heat from both of their bodies.

"If you don't fuck me right here and now I'll beat the crap out of you," Naruto responded with feeling.

Sasuke grinned coated his fingers well in his mouth before leaning down and kissing him again, tongue delving in once more and roving against Naruto's while Naruto's fingers raked down Sasuke's sides. Naruto felt wet fingers massaging around his hole fingers barely being pushed inside before being taken away and he felt something larger breach him. His back arched a little from the sting of not being prepared much at all and also the familiar and oh so good sensation of Sasuke entering him. Sasuke wasn't real gentle, he shallow thrusted a few times before pushing in entirely, arm going around Naruto's leg, forcing it up and out a little more so he could get in deeper.

Naruto hissed and gripped Sasuke's shoulders hard enough for his fingernails to break skin.

"I hurt you," Sasuke murmured. "You should be careful what you ask for."

He might be mocking him, but underneath that Sasuke was a little concerned. Well a little.

"Don't you dare stop, jerk."

"Like I would."

"You fucking liar-ah!"

Sasuke straightened his back and like he always did, hit that sweet spot dead on. He thrust so hard, that the chocolate that had crept beneath Naruto when he'd arched his back made him slide up a few inches before Sasuke's grip around his leg dragged him back down and he did it again.

Naruto squeezed his eyes shut in that moment, one of his hands dropping off Sasuke's shoulder to lie on the bench beside his own head. Sasuke grabbed that hand, twining his fingers with Naruto's and put his weight against it to keep Naruto from moving too much as he continued to thrust deeply inside him.

The hand on his leg gripped tighter as Naruto used his foot, still firmly planted on the countertop as leverage, to raise his hips up to meet every thrust. He heard Sasuke moan above him and he felt a faint fluttering in his belly that steadily grew until he felt Sasuke start to quicken the pace and he came hard in between them. When Sasuke felt that he groaned deeply and thrust a few more times before stopping, letting go of the captured leg and gently fell forward on top of Naruto.

Hands still clasped tightly he heard and felt Sasuke sigh deeply.

"That wasn't the plan," Sasuke murmured.

"You were gonna spend the night teasing me weren't you?"

"Was I that transparent?"

"Yeah. Wasn't hard to figure out. Figured you'd see it through too. That's not like you to quit."

"Not my fault."

"Hey I'm happy your master plan backfired and all, but you can't blame that on me."

"Yes I can. When I licked the chocolate off you it reminded me of Yule. Then all I could think about was fucking you as soon as possible."

Naruto laughed, "I thought about that too. This shit is a lot stickier than cake though."

Sasuke let go of his hand and sat up while Naruto attempted to do the same. It was then that he got to fully appreciate the mess they'd made. Sugar, vanilla pods and the rest of the ingredients were all knocked over and mostly on the floor. The chocolate itself was smeared over both their torsos and in a moment of hilarity Naruto saw that it covered half of Sasuke's face too from where he'd laid his head on Naruto's chest.

Half trying not to laugh too much, Naruto leant over and ran his tongue over Sasuke's cheek and then smacked his lips thoughtfully.

"Yep your right, it totally tastes better now."

After giving Naruto an unimpressed look, Sasuke too looked around at the minor devastation.

"Shower first or clean?" Naruto asked.

"Shower. I don't want to try and get this stuff off once it sets."

"You know, you wasted an entire batch of chocolate just because you _had_ to get back at me."

Sasuke shrugged and smirked at him. "Well you know what this means."

"No what?"

"We'll have to make more tomorrow. And probably the night after too."

Naruto knew Sasuke well enough to read into that statement pretty quickly.

"Well, we wanta get it right after all."

* * *

><p>Among lots of other girls, Sakura had been one who had given Sasuke chocolates for Valentine's. Sure Sasuke had told her last Yule that he only wanted to be friends with her, but she had also given some chocolate to Naruto too this year so maybe it had only been a friendship thing after all.<p>

She eyed the box weirdly for a moment though when Naruto had given it to her.

"You two really made this?" she asked dubiously.

Obviously she was starting to get the message about Sasuke. A couple of months ago she would have been gushing that he'd actually stooped to making her something and wouldn't have questioned it.

"Of course!" Naruto told her. "We put a lot into making that!"

"Really?" Sakura asked Sasuke as though he was some great insight into the truth than her close teammate.

"It took three nights to get it just right. I did most of the work."

Naruto glared at him.

"Oh okay," Sakura said apparently satisfied by the answer. "Wow you guys sure made a lot."

Naruto suddenly smiled at that particular comment sharing a split second look with Sasuke.

"Well turns out making chocolate is really fun. I'm looking forward to getting heaps of chocolate next year so we can do it again."

Sakura smiled at Naruto's enthusiasm. "Well you don't have to wait for a special occasion. Hey maybe we can make some more next weekend, just the three of us."

Naruto frowned at her. "Wow, Sakura-chan that's really sick."

Sakura looked really surprised by the response and looked to Sasuke who had managed to sling an arm around Naruto's neck and clamp a hand over his mouth before he could say anything else.

"Don't mind him, there's something wrong with his brain."

"Um, okay. Anyway, thanks for the gift."

"Yeah sure. Later."

With that Sasuke turned and with his arm still around Naruto's neck began leading the pair of them away.

When they were halfway down the street Sasuke released him and smacked him upside the head.

Even from here she could hear Naruto swear and reply to whatever Sasuke had said to him that she hadn't been able to hear.

"Jeez Sasuke, I was just kidding around! Lucky I didn't tell her the secret of what was missing from what she got."

Sakura watched them for a little while longer before shrugging and turning away. As she walked she took a piece of the white chocolate out of the box and tasted it experimentally.

"Wow," she said to herself in surprise. "This is really good. I can't imagine what it might be missing."

* * *

><p><em>Notes: This was fun. Not as good as the Yule special but still lots of fun. I hope you all had fun too!<em>

_ Dash._


	9. Chasing Away The Past Preview

_Notes: So this is just a preview and not the finished beginning of chapter one though it is quite a big preview. Not certain about posting times yet but it should start up again soonish. The chapter here might change a little before posting and will def be longer. Anyway I hope you enjoy :)_

_Dash._

**WNL Series.**

**Chasing Away The Past**

**Chapter 1 Preview**

Naruto was trapped.

Behind him was a smooth wall sliding against him occasionally sending chills running down his back as his shoulders made contact with the cool surface. On the other side and beneath him was a warm slightly sweaty body, arms wrapped around him, helping him move, causing his shoulders to slide against the wall behind him. His own legs were bent, his feet planted behind that person on the bed while he sat in the person's lap, their legs crossed beneath them, their cock filling him up and making him moan.

He was very close.

"Sas…Sasuke…"

He wanted to tell him to slow down or do something, _anything_ to prolong what they were doing but he couldn't get the words out in time. So instead he squeezed his eyes closed and went with his coming orgasm making Sasuke groan as the muscles clenched around him causing his pleasure to be cut short as well as he came not too long afterwards.

Breathing heavily, Naruto let his head drop back to rest against the wall behind him while he continued to hold on to Sasuke's slick shoulders and recover. Moments later he felt Sasuke lean forward and rest his forehead against Naruto's chest and Naruto ran a hand up through the damp hair on the back of his neck.

Well either they were both really out of shape or it had been going on longer than he'd thought it had. He was always torn between wanting it to go longer and wanting to come that he often lost track of time. Besides, Sasuke had been back in Konoha for almost six months and it wasn't like it had been in the old days. In the old days before he'd come back and the two of them had been sneaking out to see each other in secret it had almost always out of necessity been quick and to the point. Nowadays they had no such problems. The longest time they spent apart was when Naruto had to go out on mission and so far the longest of which had only been a week. It had been a long week from both of their perspectives and when he'd gotten home they'd spent the next three days doing pretty much what they had just done only stopping for food, sleep and showers.

Then he'd spent about the same amount of time recovering and warning Sasuke that if he ever so much as tried to start anything, Naruto would beat the ever-living crap out of him. This was because, generally speaking, Naruto was almost always the one in the most pain. And it wasn't like they had pre-defined roles within the relationship either where he must always be on the receiving end because it wasn't always the way. But it usually was. And tonight he was regretting it again. He'd just come back from a mission yesterday and so far Sasuke hadn't let up. It was really nice to be missed so thoroughly, but it was getting pretty painful too, he had to admit.

Luckily these days pain was only really a factor when they were at each other for days at a time or when one or the other of them decided to get a little too rough, but it was still annoying when he went out the next day only to feel his back scream in response, his shoulder muscles ache, not to mention his, usually by this point, greatly abused ass to cause him to hiss every time he tried to sit down.

"Sasuke?"

"Mmmm?" was the muffled response of a head resting face first against his chest.

"Why am I hardly ever on top?"

Sasuke raised his head at this out of the blue question and further raised one eyebrow too. "Call me crazy, but I'm pretty sure you're the one sitting on me right now."

"You know what I mean, teme!"

Sasuke did the smallest of exhausted shoulder shrugs. "I'm usually the one that starts things."

"So if I started it you'd…you know."

"Take one for the team?" Sasuke asked with a smirk.

Thankfully in the darkness Sasuke probably couldn't see him flush. "Well, yeah, I guess."

"It's not like it's never happened," Sasuke reminded him.

"Not very often. Was it, um…not good?"

Sasuke frowned a little. "It was good. You like it better that way?"

"I wouldn't say that," Naruto answered quickly. "It's always good, better than good, fantastic even and I-"

"Rambling," Sasuke warned.

Naruto took a deep breath, knowing he was going to regret bringing this up but also knowing Sasuke would pick at him till he had an answer now it had started. He wasn't generally a nosy person but he wouldn't stand for the notion that he was never the best ever at everything. Which wasn't at all what Naruto was implying, but Sasuke would take it as an insult unless reassured otherwise.

"It's just that I after these days long sessions when I get home I get sorta sore and it's bad when I gotta go out and train, but mostly I was wondering whether you preferred it this way because you don't like it when I do it to you."

"You think _I_ think you're crap?" Sasuke clarified.

"Well yeah."

"And you think I would be better off being the sore one because I don't have to go out and train like you do," Sasuke went on.

Naruto rolled his eyes. "Fuck me Sasuke, why do you have to go and make everything sound so…so…"

"Negative?"

"Yeah!"

"Because it's generally the way things really are. You think I'm not sore after our sessions either?"

"Not like I am," Naruto muttered.

"Tch. It's not that bad. You want me to stop jumping on you the moment you get home?"

"No!"

"I didn't think so. You've never complained before."

"I'm not complaining now! I wouldn't give this up for anything, I was just asking a question."

"So you don't want us to stop doing this?"

Did Sasuke mean that he was talking about them breaking up? "Woah, woah, this is getting blown way out of proportion. Look I love what you do to me but would it be so bad for once that you were the one walking funny afterwards?"

"It's not like we trap ourselves in here for days at a time all the time. Only when you get back from missions."

"That's true I guess," Naruto reasoned. But then, "Hey, you still haven't answered my question. I was right, wasn't I? I'm crap, aren't I?"

Well maybe Sasuke wasn't the only one who liked to know they were good at something.

Sasuke took his time answering and that gave Naruto a bad feeling.

"You're not crap. Look wait, my legs are going numb," Sasuke told him before urging him to slide his legs back and sit up so Sasuke could get out from underneath him and lay back with a huge sigh.

Naruto sat down next to him and winced for a moment before finding a more comfortable way to sit.

"You're such a girl," Sasuke commented watching him.

"And you're really bad at answering questions," Naruto shot back. "C'mon there's got to be more to it than, 'you're not crap'."

"It's complicated," Sasuke replied after a few moments. "Do you remember what I told you in the hot springs about my past experiences?"

It didn't take long to remember, it had definitely been one of those things that stuck in your mind. He'd never imagined that had anything to do with this though, otherwise he would have kept his mouth shut. Sasuke didn't like to talk about things at the best of times, though he was getting better at it these days. Mainly because now that he lived with Naruto it was either spill or be bugged for weeks at a time. So in the interests of his sanity, Sasuke tended to break from past habits and do the occasional share. But this time Naruto was going to give him a free 'out'. There were just some things that probably needed to be talked about when the other person was ready, not forced out because they thought they would be verbally tortured till they talked about it.

""I remember. Look Sasuke, you don't have to tell me about it. If that had anything to do with this…"

And then Naruto realised just how Sasuke could be having a problem with the thought of someone else topping. His brain quite literally didn't know what to do. He was livid, disgusted, and horrified all in one go. The thought that someone had touched Sasuke and done _that_ to him was like someone had just smacked him in the head and chest simultaneously. It reminded him of how he'd felt the first time Sasuke had told him.

But he'd never imagined that what they did together now could make things worse for Sasuke. That what they did together might impact him in the same way. The aura of barely controlled brain explosion must have reached Sasuke pretty quickly cause he sat up sharply and grabbed his chin forcing Naruto to look at him and pay attention. "No, don't let you mind take you there. It wasn't like that."

"Somebody forced you!" Naruto exclaimed his mind unwilling to let go of it now. It was lucky he had such tight control of the Kyuubi these days or the room might have exploded quite literally. As it was he could feel his teeth sharpen at the thought.

Sasuke must have seen it too. "If you don't calm down I will hit you and make you calm down. Nobody forced me, not really. I explained this to you already. There was always the option of saying no and walking away but I didn't because I could only think of moving forward and I felt that if I didn't do certain things in certain situations that I wouldn't be allowed to keep moving in the direction I wanted. I did feel trapped, I didn't choose who or when, but I didn't say no either. That isn't being forced, that's just doing whatever you feel you have to do to achieve a higher goal. Which I might add was not worth it in the end."

"I don't understand the difference," Naruto told him. "If it was either do it or else, that's still being forced."

"Well _I _do understand and, no offence, but that's what really matters."

"You got hurt though, didn't you?"

Sasuke didn't answer him, but he didn't really need to. A lot of things made a lot more sense to him now. Especially that time in the dark temple when Sasuke had told him that he trusted him and that he needed to do this right before Naruto had experienced being inside him for the first time. Now that he understood just what those words meant he felt pretty sick about it. Of course the fact that Sasuke had trusted him so much to even contemplate doing that so early in their relationship was not lost on him either but he felt sick about it all the same.

"You're thinking about it too much dobe, I can almost hear the wheels turning."

Naruto took a deep breath. Though Sasuke had managed to calm him down a bit, he still wanted to know just who this person or people were so he could go to them and make them very sorry.

"It was more than one, wasn't it?"

"Why do you ask? Do you want to be all protective and do something violent to them?" Sasuke asked.

"You bet I do!"

"Well too bad because I'm pretty sure that most of them are already dead. But what you can actually do for me is drop it. I'm over it and you should be too."

Even Naruto could tell Sasuke was lying. Not every bad dream he had, and there were a lot of them, could just be about his brother and the rest of his family. But for Sasuke's sake he'd try to appear calm right now because pissing on about it was not going to be helpful at the moment.

"But anyway," Sasuke continued, "It does have a bit to do with certain reservations I have about the experience. _Past_ reservations."

"I would never hurt you Sasuke," Naruto told him softly.

"Not even if I asked nicely?"

"Don't even make jokes about that. Look I won't bring it up again, okay? It doesn't matter at all to me who does what."

"It might not have much before, but it will now," Sasuke told him perceptively. "I bet you already feel bad about past times you've fucked me. I'm telling you this now, the fact that I could do that with you should tell you how much I trust you. You haven't forced me, I've always had a clear and easy choice to say no and it's the only time it feels okay to lose control. If you ever got into the mood to do it again I would gladly let you because with you it's amazing."

Sasuke never said things to him just for the sake of making him feel better, never. And he seemed really sincere too. But Naruto knew he'd never feel good about taking that feeling of control away from him again. It probably only happened one time in ten anyway and it was hardly a big ask to let that one time go. It didn't matter because like Sasuke had pretty much said; when he was with him it was always amazing.

And Naruto realised that like before, he'd already dealt with this knowledge of what had happened and his own anger at it. It also made him realise that he was angrier with himself too. All the things they'd done, the things Naruto had done to him even after he'd been sort of told about this the first time burned themselves into his brain. He was angry at himself for not realising or even really thinking about it again after Sasuke had told him that first time what further damage Naruto might do to his sanity reminding Sasuke of things he probably wanted to forget about. So he promised himself never to do that again.

TBC

_Notes: Alright, so not much about the plot yet, but there's a little light smut there anyway to tide you all over :) So anyway this new fic in the series will be posted as its own fic so you'll have to author alert me or check up on my profile at a later date to see when the fic will be released on it's own. There will be **no more** additions to the end of this fic so story alerting this will not tell you when the new fic comes out just so you know. Anyway, thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy the fic when it comes out *big smile* _

_Dash._


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